Love Notes

Chapter 32-Maverick



I know I hurt her and I didn’t mean to, but I just can’t deal right now. I have to figure out what I’m going to do. My whole damn life, football has been a huge part of me. I’ve lived and breathed football since I could walk. It’s who I am and now that has been completely ripped away from me. I have so many things to figure out and I just can’t be with her, not like this. Even if I can still feel that pounding need and ache for her.

Asking her to leave was one of the hardest things I have ever done in my life and I realize I may even lose her for good over this.

My mom and dad look at me with sad eyes. My dad speaks up first. “I know you need some time. We’ll be in the waiting room, if you need us. Just think about this. You are good at many things and have a lot to offer the world besides football. Think before you make some gigantic mistakes that you can’t take back.”

My mom leans over and kisses my forehead before turning and walking hand in hand with my dad.

I’m reeling over what my future may hold, when I see Will pop his head in the door way. “Hey man, is this a good time? I just spoke to your parents.”

I snort in response, I can’t help it. Lucky for me he says, “Well I don’t care if it is or not, because I’m coming on in, so you can get over yourself. I just saw Charlie leaving, but she didn’t see me. She ran right by me with huge tears running down her face. You want to explain to me what that was all about? I know you’re smarter than that Maverick. I know you didn’t just completely throw her out, right? I mean she’s funny, smart, terrific singer so I hear and hot as hell even though she doesn’t know it. Let’s face it that in itself is a huge turn on.”

I can’t help the huge sigh that tumbles from my mouth, “Are you done now dude or would you like to continue? While we are discussing Charlie, since when did you notice her and her hotness?”

I can’t help the pang of jealousy that flies through my body. I know Will has eyes for a certain mouthy red head, but the fact is he still noticed Charlie.

“Chill out Maverick. I’m a guy and I can’t help but notice. For crying out loud, do you think I’m the only guy that has paid attention to her curves, because I am most definitely am not. Not to mention she’s really sweet and different than the majority of the girls we go to school with.”

I can’t help it; I’m starting to get severely pissed off. I don’t like anyone talking about her. Don’t get me wrong, I like others seeing her qualities, but not so extensively as Will is nailing it in this five minute conversation.

“Well, now I see that I have really gotten your attention. Excellent!” Will says, “What the hell are you trying to do? You have this awesome girl who thinks you hung the moon and what do you do? You push her as far away as humanly possible. Why and what for? Dumb ass move bro. Dumb ass move. I would kill to have a girl like Charlie.”

“Now, are you done?” I ask. Will throws me his trademark smirk and crosses his arms like he means business. “For now.”

I know he’s the one person who completely gets me. We’ve been friends since kindergarten. He knows me the best, better than Charlie. “Look Will, all I have ever known and breathed is football and to hear that I will never play again, is a big deal. It’s who I am and I don’t know who I am without it. You of all people should understand that.”

“Here is what I know Maverick, and listen to me good. I know you think that football is all you are, but you're wrong. I can’t even begin to imagine how you feel and I’m not trying to. I’m just saying that there is more to you than football and you need to figure it out before you lose her. Because you will if you wait to long. That’s all I’m going to leave you with. However, I understand and realize that you’ve got to figure this out for yourself.”

I know I have a lot to figure out and I just need time, but for right now, I need to do this myself, alone. “Will, I will think on it. Happy?”

Will hangs his head down staring at the floor and shuffles his feet back and forth, like there’s something else weighing heavily on his mind. More than likely he’s thinking about Tori and I feel somewhat bad. I also know he’s irritated with me, but he’s going to have to get over it. I just need time. However long it takes, I have to figure this out for myself.

“Whatever Maverick, I’ll let you feel this way right now, because it’s fresh and just happened and you still haven’t gotten used to the idea. Just do me a favor.” He doesn’t give me a chance to respond. “Don’t take too long to figure it out, because if you do, she probably won’t be here. Look, I’m your best friend and I will support you completely. I just don’t want you to make a mistake that you can’t take back. What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t say anything?”

With that last sentence he walks out the door.