“Don’t do that,” Antonio insisted. I looked over to see the slight scowl on his face. “I knew from day one he’d pull a dick-move like this eventually. He played us both.”
I sat quietly while Antonio seemed to get lost in thought, probably thinking over the past and the role AJ played in breaking his heart and now mine. When he shook his head I turned to face him.
“What is it?” I asked.
“Nah…it’s nothing.”
Now I was curious. “Speak your mind. When’s the last time we just talked without it being awkward or…weird between us? Whatever it is, say it.”
Antonio glanced over at me for a second and then managed to smile a little. “I was just thinking about how, after everything you and I have been through…I hate seeing you cry over him. It makes me feel like I should’ve fought harder for you, because I never would’ve broken your heart.”
I didn’t speak, mostly because I didn’t know what to say.
“Sometimes I feel like I let you slip through my fingers too easily – like I should’ve proven to you that you’re worth fighting for,” he added.
My face felt warm with embarrassment when he put me on the spot, which made him chuckle a little.
“Was I wrong for saying that?” He asked.
I weighed my words carefully. “Not…..wrong, per se, I just……I don’t...”
His smile grew as I stammered. “Relax, I’m not hitting on you. I’m just sayin’…you’re not the only one who wonders if you should’ve done something differently.”
Speaking of awkward….my pulse raced even faster, feeling stupid for jumping to conclusions. Here I go overreacting again; of course he didn’t mean anything by it.
“You know what? I think I’m gonna take off now,” I said, unable to make eye contact. “Believe it or not, I’m supposed to be in class and I can’t afford to be a no-show again.”
Antonio shook his head with a slight smile still present, knowing that I just needed an excuse to exit. He stood and followed me to the door where I slipped back into my shoes and coat.
“I’m glad you came by – glad that you knew it’d be okay,” he corrected.
I nodded, feeling the same way. A shocked look came over his face when I hugged him quickly before opening the door to let myself out.
I was half way down the sidewalk when he asked, “Will I see you again anytime soon?”
I looked back and shrugged coyly. “You know what? You might.”
Chapter12
AJ
That look on her face…..
What she accused me of doing…..
Staring at her ring in my hand, I went over it and over it again and again and still didn’t believe the way things went down. It was like watching a movie of someone else’s life, yelling at the television screen that everything they thought was real wasn’t, only to have your words fall on deaf ears. In Sam’s mind, I was guilty and there wasn’t anything I could do to change that.
I spent days going over the details in my mind. At first I was hurt that she thought I was even capable of cheating on her, but then when I looked at the situation from her perspective…
I’d been lying for months, and while I felt like my motives were noble, it wasn’t until everything blew up in my face that I realized that there is no such thing as a noble lie. My attempt to shield her from reality ended up making me look like a fraud. She wouldn’t even listen to me when I tried to explain.
When I returned from pleading with her in the court yard, I couldn’t believe that Reina had actually stuck around. She met my gaze with fear in her eyes when I slammed the door and rushed toward her, nearly forgetting that she wasn’t a guy and that I couldn’t put my hands on her.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I demanded.
“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” she reasoned.
That wasn’t the answer to my question and whether she meant for this to happen or not, Sam was now thoroughly convinced that I betrayed her. Fighting off insanity, I gritted my teeth and stared into the eyes of the girl who’d probably just cost me everything I’d been working so hard to hold on to.