Trying Not To Love You

Today I was thirty-seven weeks. I had a doctor's appointment and another ultrasound set up. This would be the last one before we would finally get to meet our little chunky monkey. Hunter had to work today, so he was going to meet me at the doctor's office on his lunch break.

I got out of bed and started getting ready for the appointment when my cell phone started ringing.

"Hello?"

"Hey Kenzie, how's my little man doing?" Hailey was always asking how little man was doing, never how I am feeling and she refused to entertain the idea that I might be having a girl.

"You know, I think you love the baby more than you love me." I laughed, "The baby's doing well, me not so much. My feet are really swollen and I'm waddling more and more like a duck."

"Put the phone up to your belly. I want to talk to him."

Laughing, I did as she asked. After a good minute, I put the phone back up to my ear and told her, "I have a doctor's appointment around lunch time today so I will have more pictures to show you. Do you want me to stop over when I'm done?"

"Yeah, that would be good. Mason is supposed to come over and take me to dinner tonight."

"Oh, really?" Hailey and Mason's relationship was rocky right now. Something was going on, but they both refused to talk about it. Any time I mentioned anything about it, they told me it was really nothing for me to worry myself. I tried talking to Hunter about it, but he just told me everything would be ok between them. He explained they weren't really fighting themselves. They were fighting about something else that was going on.

"Nothing special just dinner."

"Ok. I really wish you would talk to me, and tell me what is going on Hails. I hate seeing you guys like this."

Hailey let out a big sigh. "You don't need the added stress; remember what the doctor said? You need to stay nice and relaxed. Everyone is taking care of everything. Stop worrying that pretty little head of yours."

I was getting a little irritated because everyone was treating me as if I was made of glass. "It's stressing me out that you will not talk to me about it Hails. You talk to me about everything; why not this?"

She huffed, "Because I just can't. Now stop worrying and go get ready."

"Fine, but this isn't over. I'll call you when I'm on my way."

"OK, love you and little man."

I laughed and said, "It's Princess and I love you too."

I was standing in my closet trying to find something to wear when I heard a crack of thunder that made me jump. I was rubbing my belly as the baby moved around. "Oh boy, chunky monkey, it's raining. We better hurry up and get out of here so we aren't late."

After I changed, I walked to the front door, slipped on my flip-flops and grabbed the umbrella. It was pouring outside; even with the umbrella, I was still getting wet. I noticed there was a car parked at the end of the driveway, which was unusual for our neighborhood. I started the car and backed out. I thought it looked like Brittany in the car, but it couldn't have been. She and Dominic broke up right after school was over. I brushed it off, and left our development, heading towards the highway.

Merging onto the highway, the rain was coming down harder. It was making it very hard to see, even with the wipers on full speed. I looked in my rearview mirror and noticed the car that had parked at the end of my driveway was now following behind me. I only needed to go about two exits up on Route 295. I figured I would be ok as long as I took it nice and slow and did not panic.

About a half mile before my exit, I saw the car directly in front of me start to hydroplane. The driver must have panicked, because the car started swerving into the lane next to it. Just as the driver jerked the steering wheel, he collided with another car. I tried to slam on my breaks to avoid the accident, but the person that was following me slammed into me. I slid off the highway, down an embankment.

Screaming, I braced myself for the collision I knew was coming. It didn't happen right away. I flipped upside down three times before I finally felt the car stop. Everything was fuzzy, I couldn't see straight and my body felt numb.

I don't know how long I had laid there before I heard someone approaching. I tried to yell for help but nothing came out. I saw a shadow of a person look in through the side of the passenger side door.

Why are they not helping me? I thought.

I heard a girl speak, "If I can't have him, neither can you bitch."

I got a razor sharp stab of pain in my stomach. It was so strong; I was seeing stars, and then nothing after that.

When I woke up, my whole body hurt. It was almost unbearable but something was pulling me from my sleep. I tried to open my eyes but they were just too heavy. I tried to concentrate and figure out what was going on, where I was. I felt like there was something gagging me; there was pain in my stomach, chest and right leg, lots of pain. I remember driving; it was really raining hard. There was a bad crash, my car flipping. Someone was there looking into my car and then there was darkness.

I felt something warm run down my face. I tried to reach up and wipe it away but my arms were too heavy. I heard humming and knew Hunter was here with me, wherever I am.

"Sweetheart, why don't you go home for a few hours? You could shower, grab some food and try to get some sleep? I will stay here with MacKenzie and the baby. They both need you to be strong for them." I knew that voice; it was my mom's, but what was she talking about a baby for?

A violent stab of a pain hit my head. I was trying desperately not to give back into the darkness.

The humming stopped and Hunter's voice spoke, "I'm not leaving them, I can't."

I heard little whimpers of a cry, and then he went back to humming.

I felt so confused. I tried opening my eyes again but they were still too heavy. I felt someone grab my hand. I tried to squeeze it but I didn't have the strength.

"Oh baby girl." mom said, rubbing circles on the back on my hand with her thumb. "You have to wake up your boys need you."

My boys, does she mean my brothers? Another flashback came back to me. I was on my way to meet Hunter somewhere. Why was I meeting him?

The pain was increasing and the pull into the darkness was becoming too much to fight.

The noise in the room started phasing out except for a beeping noise.

"Baby girl, if you can hear me squeeze my hand." Mom said.

Beep.

I tried to squeeze but I just couldn't.

Beep.

I felt a warm fingers touch my face and gently rub from my temple to my jaw and back again. "CC, please open your bright blue eyes for me baby."

Beep.

"I need you; I can't do this on my own." I heard him sniffle. "He looks just like you. Same little nose, head full of dark curly hair." He sniffled again. "I love you baby."

Then there was a long beep and the blackness finally took over.

Look for part two of their story in

the fall of 2013.