Love Notes

Chapter 21-Charlie



Monday morning seems to take forever to get here. Where most high school students can't wait for the weekends, I despise them.

Going to school is a form of acting. For just a little while, I get to pretend that I’m someone else.

I spoke to Maverick for all of a few minutes yesterday afternoon. Long enough for me to tell him the song choice that Tori I decided on. She and I decided on a classic. Who can ever resist Journey, Don’t Stop Believing? We think it’s perfect and he did say he trusted us, after all. I think he may be more nervous about singing in public than he’s willing to admit. He may have groaned just a little into the phone. But then, he invited me to his parents’ house for dinner the following weekend. This had me surprised and excited.

To be honest, I haven't asked my parents if I can go. I may have told them I was working on a musical number for school. Which I am. Just not when I go to Maverick’s house. I’m not advertising lying to your parents. I’ve never lied to mine. I've just distorted the truth a tad bit.

Call me brazen or stupid, I don't care.

That's a lie. I do care, I care a lot. I’m concerned about the ramifications if they find out I haven't been completely honest.

Mr. Hall did ask that we all start practicing after school, a couple of times a week and I’ve already explained this to the parentals, so it really is a small lie.

My justification.

After spending all weekend stuck at home, this afternoon seems as good as any to practice. Plus, as crazy as it sounds, I need reassurance.

I know I'm stupid, but never in my whole life has anyone, stood up for me. It pissed my dad off royally. I actually think he was more stunned than anything. Regardless of his mood, it made me happy to know that Maverick is the one that put that look on his face while taking up for me.

The moment I pull into the parking lot and hop out of Lexie, I spot Maverick looking so damn good, waiting for me.

I feel shy. It was as if I don't know what to say or how he would react to me. Apparently, I shouldn't have worried. The moment he sees me, his eyes light up, and a huge grin spreads across his handsome face, as he starts making his way over to me. I can't help but feel that usual doubt, but I’m tampering it down. This isn’t normal for me.

The moment he’s beside me, he grabs my hand, “I couldn't wait for Monday to come. Just so I could see you.”

As soon as these words leave his mouth I feel a little more at ease. “I'm staying for practice this afternoon, you coming?” I ask.

“Yep, especially if that means I get some more quality time with you.” he says. He will never know what his sweet words mean to me.

As we walk towards the senior area, I spot Tori walking towards us with a huge grin plastered across her face.

“Hey guys, who all is staying after school to practice?” she asks.

We simultaneously say that we both are.

“Oh good, Maverick has no clue what he's in for,” she laughs cynically.

I can't help but roll my eyes and laugh at her attempt at an evil laugh.

There is nothing evil about that girl.

“Maverick, you ready to show us what you got? Because, I myself am very curious.” Tori smirks.

I take a quick glance at Maverick and see a slightly startled look cross his face. This to me is even funnier. It's kind of nice to see the big bad football player be just a tad unsure about the singing thing.

Singing is something that doesn't bother me in the slightest. Don’t get me wrong, I hate being the center of attention. However, with music it’s different. I can escape and tune everyone out and think about nothing, but the words. I don’t notice anyone when I’m singing.

I'm sure for him to go in front of his whole team, is a huge deal. He leans over and asks, “Hey babe, you ready to get your singing on?” I laugh only because he’s so screwed. “I am, but the real question is, are you?”

“Not going to lie Charlie, I'm a little concerned about singing in public, but don't be knocking my skills until they’ve been heard.” As he wags his eyebrows at me, grinning.

Now at this I laugh. I can’t picture him singing. Not, one, bit.

Later that day, as soon as we enter the Auditorium for class, Mr. Hall directs each group into a corner where we won't bother each other.

He starts to clear his throat. The music starts and Maverick starts singing his part of the song. I’m stunned and pleasantly surprised. He turns and looks at me, as if he’s singing directly to me. Tori nudges me, signaling that it's our turn. We harmonize our line perfectly and get ready to join Maverick with the chorus. My head is still spinning with the knowledge that he can actually sing. Talk about a surprise and a half. The whole time he sings, his eyes never stray from mine. I’m completely captivated by him.

Nothing matters. Not home, my dad, my mom. Absolutely nothing, except for him and me.

The moment the song is over, we continue to stare at each other. I don't even know what to say. As corny as it may sound, we had a moment and nobody else existed. How did I come to like this guy so much, so fast? It scares the living shit out of me. It's so nerve wracking that my negative thoughts get the best of me.

I turn and flee the room. The moment I make it into the rest room, I start crying. I don't realize I’m being followed, until Tori walks in.

“Didn't you hear me calling your name? Charlie, what's wrong? Why are you crying?”

How do you explain that you aren't good enough for someone? That you aren't who that person needs. How do I explain to Tori, without telling her?

“Why does he like me?” It's the only question I know to ask and I hope that she doesn't ask too many questions.

She seems flustered by the question. “Why do you ask me this? There is so much to like. Why do you feel this way? What’s going on?”

I can't tell her–not yet anyway. It's too soon and way too embarrassing. I decide to play dumb and get over it. I can fall apart later. He probably thinks I’m an idiot now. I can't believe I ran out, I chastise myself.

“I'm fine, really. Thanks for following me and checking up on me. You're a good friend.”

She looks at me with a look of concern and confusion.

“You're not okay Charlie, and I don't know why you won't talk to me about it. I can tell there’s something going on, but if you don't want to talk yet, then fine. Just know I will be here, as your friend. No judgments.”

“Thank you.” It's all I can muster.

I don't want to lie; I just don't want to talk to her about it. Now to face Maverick. Here's to hoping he doesn't think I'm a complete loose cannon.

As soon as I walk out the door, there he is leaning up against the wall. “Hey, you okay? Did my singing scare you off?” he jokes.

“What? No. I'm good. Sorry about that.” I think of a quick story that won't make me look like a total fool.

“I wasn't feeling good for a moment. I felt sick to my stomach, but I'm fine now.”

Honestly I don't think he’s buying my bull shit explanation, but it looks as if he is going to take it, for now.

Changing the subject quickly, “You’re really good! Why didn’t you tell me you could sing?”

He chuckles, “Honestly, I didn’t think I was. I sing in the shower from time to time and that’s as far as my singing career goes.”

Peering down at me, he asks, “You feel up to practicing more?”

I throw on smile, to make sure that he knows, I’m good to go and nod a yes. Taking my hand, we walk into the auditorium, where we practice for an hour, before I don’t have a choice but to go home.

Home, the dreaded awful word.