Misguided Heart

Thirty-Seven

Aston

Last night and this morning was incredible. I was still sore from our night and early morning tryst. A girl could definitely get used to this. I was walking on cloud nine when I finally made it to the office. My body could feel his presence the moment I stepped out of the elevator. Of course reality came crashing down on me like a ton of bricks, once I entered my office. I had totally forgotten about the hundreds of roses scattered throughout my office and there went my cloud.

Knowing how the flowers would make Sloan feel, I called for Annie to throw them all away. Every single last rose was to be gone within a half an hour. As soon as my office was cleared out and back to normal, I made the one phone call I had been dreading.

“Thank you for calling Destination Unknown, this is Shelby. How may I help you?”

"Hey whore, long time no talk.”

“Well if it isn't the skank herself. You and Sloan come up for air? Or is it Nole? I just can't keep track anymore.”

“Ha ha, you're funny for a nitwit. Yes we did, and it was Sloan.”

Insert long pause, and let the insults flow!

"Well good for you."

I sat back in my chair, baffled at the odd way Shelby was behaving. We always insulted each other and made fun of one another. It was our thing. "Okay, spill. What the hell is going on with you? And don't tell me nothing."

When I heard Shelby clear her throat, I knew I was in for it. "Well, things have been going really well with Braden lately. We just decided that, maybe it was time, for, um, Braden moved in."

The line went completely silent and I let out a sigh of relief. The way she was hemming and hawing, I thought maybe someone had died. "Well Jesus Shelby, could you just spit it out next time. I swear I almost had a goddamned heart attack. That's amazing, no?"

"Sure. You know how I get Aston. I have the worst taste in men, and let's not forget that when Braden and I first hooked up in the beginning, things didn't work out then either. Why should now be so different?"

I was in a state of shock. Shelby never worried about how things were going to pan out, at least not when it came to guys. If it didn't work out, she would just move on to the next. "Listen up slut, I don't know why you are so worried about this, but you guys found your way back to each other. After all of these years of being apart, you guys saw each other again and the rest is history. Why are you so worried? You have had guys move in before."

Shelby, god bless her heart, had a habit of moving in almost every single one of her boyfriends. She was a co-dependent person and it showed when she dated. Honestly, I think she was just afraid of letting them be away for too long. When you get cheated on so many times, you tend to think the worst in men.

"Okay, okay stop beating it out of me. He asked me to marry him."

In an instant, three things happened in unison. First, my phone slipped from my cold sweaty hands, landing on the top of my desk, shattering into pieces. Second, my jaw dropped to the floor and went completely dry. Third, a single tear fell from the corner of my eye.

I wasn't one to cry, but how, how could the one person I never expected to get married, be engaged before me? This couldn't be happening. I know I sounded like a little baby, but my heart was breaking. Inside I felt as though someone walked through my door and stabbed me through the heart.

It was supposed to be me first. Shelby could barely keep her life together, let alone her relationships. And with Braden, what was that all about? Braden was worse than Shelby. He couldn't commit to a f*cking shirt half of the time. What the f*ck was happening in my life? Was I unlovable? Was I just the girl who fixed them up all pretty and shiny for a new owner?

If my track record were any indication, then the answer would be yes. I pulled myself together, wiped the tear from my face and went about fixing my phone. I was so not in the mood to be at work, but if the pile of manuscripts didn't get finished by tomorrow, there was no way I was going to be able to go to that party.

Shelby tried calling me back at least a dozen times throughout the day, but I ignored every single one. I knew what the next step was and I wasn’t prepared to go wedding dress shopping with her just yet. I never explained to Shelby how it felt when she told me, what would be the point? I love Shelby to death, but she is a very selfish person. She had always been the type of girl who says, "Hi how are you,” but really she just wants you to ask about her.

The rest of the day seemed to drag on mercilessly. I didn't even take a lunch when Annie asked me to go along with her. I kept myself locked in my office for the greater portion of the day. That was until a very handsomely, delicious man made an appearance.

"How's your day been going, gorgeous?"

His smile went straight through me and melted my heart at first contact. I was almost speechless, almost. "Oh my day has been super, and yours?" I couldn't contain the sarcasm that sat heavily against my words.

"Wow, not as good as yours, obviously." His wicked smile had my insides in a bunch within seconds. "Mines been okay."

His arms reached out for me and I hesitated only for a second, before I lunged myself into his comforting hold. I tucked my head down on his chest and squeezed my arms tightly around his waist. He never asked me to explain and I never offered.

We stayed in our small embrace for what seemed like an hour, but was really only about ten minutes. A big part of me wanted to blurt out every emotion I was feeling, to tell him how much I cared for him, but knew it would never happen. The smarter part of me won, and I kept my feelings at bay. The day would come when I would be forced to tell him, but today just wasn't that day.