Grimmy copies.
It takes about an hour to go through the entire Halloween Walk through the woods, so pretty soon, we’re all kind of attached to Grimmy. When we walk over a small wooden bridge and look down into the water to see all of the jack-o-lanterns they place on pedestals in the water, Grimmy lifts Josh up so he can see over the railing.
When we come around a bend to see a graveyard setup on the hillside, Grimmy points out one of the big tombstones to Josh right before a ghost jumps out and tries to scare him. Josh walks right up to the ghost and kicks him in the shin.
If we could see Grimmy’s face, I bet we would see him smile.
We come around the last corner of the walk and can see people milling about at the end getting hot chocolate and hot apple cider from some of the vendors.
Uncle Drew pats Grimmy on the back. “Well, Grimster, it’s been fun. I’d say it was nice to meet you, but you scared the future children I might have had out of my nut sack when we first met.”
“Future children? Your balls are too old to have any more kids,” Dad laughs.
“I’ll have you know that my sperm are in excellent condition and my balls are NOT old. I do NOT have old man balls. Honey, tell them.” Uncle Drew looks over at Aunt Jenny.
“It’s true. He doesn’t have old man balls. They are still nice and soft and not wrinkly at all.”
Grimmy puts his hand up over his masked eyes and shakes his head sadly.
We all wave at the guy as he stands in place in the middle of the path, and we make our way out of the woods. Gavin and I walk over to one of the stands, and he gets me some hot apple cider.
“I’m having a really hard time being with you tonight and not ripping every piece of clothing off of—”
“What are you kids talking about?” Aunt Claire asks as she comes up next to us.
“The weather.”
“Astrophysics,” Gavin and I reply at the same time.
Aunt Claire looks back and forth between us suspiciously.
“The direct correlation to the earth’s atmosphere blending with the time space continuum to produce noxious gas on Mars,” I ramble.
“Well, alright then. Have fun with that,” she replies, turning around and walking back over the picnic table where everyone is seated.
“That was close. Nice save,” Gavin says quietly with a laugh as we follow behind her.
“We need to be more careful or everyone’s going to find out,” I warn him as we walk.
“Who cares? You broke up with Rocco, right? So it doesn’t matter.”
ABORT! ABORT CONVERSATION!
“I think I need to change my tampon.”
“Oh look, a squirrel!” Gavin says, rushing away from me and taking a seat next to Uncle Carter at the picnic table.
With a sigh, I take a seat across from him, next to Tyler and Josh. A man with a Metro Parks uniform walks up to our table and asks if we had a good time and enjoyed the walk.
“I beat up Freddy Kruger and kicked a ghost. It was alright,” Josh replies with a shrug.
“I have to tell ya, man, that Grim Reaper you got walking around the woods deserves a raise. That guy scared the holy hell out of me,” Uncle Drew tells him with a laugh.
We all chuckle and then notice the park worker looking at Uncle Drew in confusion.
“Grim Reaper? We don’t have a grim reaper employed with us this year, do you mean Frankenstein?” he asks.
“Uh, no. I mean the Grim Reaper. Tall guy, wearing a black cloak that dragged on the ground and had a hood pulled around his face so you couldn’t see him. And he had that big sickle thing in his hand that he walked with,” Uncle Drew explains.
“I’m sorry, sir, there is definitely no one of that description that works here this year.”
We all look around at one another in confusion, no one wanting to admit just how creeped out we are. But I know there has to be a logical explanation.
“It was probably just someone going on the walk like we were and he decided to have some fun with you,” I tell Uncle Drew.
Once again, the park worker shakes his head.
“I was at the front gate collecting tickets from everyone tonight, and there wasn’t anyone wearing a costume like that,” he says.
The man talks to us for a few more minutes about the people that volunteer for the walk every year and how he’s known them since the walk first opened twenty years ago. He walks away and our table stays silent while everyone processes what he’d said.
“Maybe he was a homeless guy or something. I bet he lives in the woods and just wanted to make some friends,” Aunt Jenny says wistfully.
“Make some friends, yeah right. That guy wanted to ass rape me,” Uncle Drew complains.
“Really, Drew? I’m surprised you noticed anything while you were humping trees and squatting over pumpkins so it looked like you were shitting them out.” Mom gets a disgusted look on her face as she remembers Uncle Drew’s actions in the woods.