It was too late. I’d already blacked out, faded into a zone where I was determined to connect to her.
I grabbed her, forcing her wrists together behind her ass and made a quick work of tying them together with my belt. Zoey twisted in my chest, fighting against my hold.
“No! Just let me go!” she grunted into my chest.
When I was done, I pulled her face into my hands. “I want you. I will always want you. I’m not sorry that no one hasn’t snatched you up yet, but I am sorry for the pain I’ve caused.”
Zoey was looking at me wide-eyed, absorbing my words with tearstained face. I immediately smashed my lips into hers, pushing my tongue into her mouth. I swallowed her tears, mucous and pain. I didn’t know how else to prove my commitment to her. She was panting in no time, but before I could feel Zoey join me, I withdrew and grabbed her under my right arm, taking her into the bathroom.
“What are you doing, Stenton?” she asked, still crying.
I moved her in front of the vanity and yanked down her shorts and underwear and stepped on them to prevent her from moving. Her body tensed, but she couldn’t move. I’d had her by the wrists, held at the back of her and my foot holding her ankles together.
“What are you doing?” Zoey yelped. “No. This isn’t right! Stenton, my—”
Before she could finish, I’d yanked her plug. Her eyes raked up to me with incredulity, mouth hanging agape. I searched my back pocket for my wallet. Within seconds, I was sheathed and pulling Zoey out of the holdings of her shorts and underwear.
With realization in her eyes, when she could have said something to discourage me from my next move, she’d only cried out, “Stenton!” She breathed my name, begging me.
I stretched her legs wide and entered her. I wasn’t sure of my pacing. My actions weren’t measured, just my intent. I needed her to know I still desired her. Still wanted her. Words could not convey that. At least none were coming to me that would.
I plummeted into Zoey, clutching her at the ass and shoulder, giving her all of me. I loved the hell out of this woman and I was at my wit’s end, trying to figure out how to do right by her. I grabbed her at the jaw, lashing her mouth with the deep desire I had for her. I couldn’t get enough of her. Zoey’s eyes were closed, absorbing me. I could feel her countering each thrust. I nipped her nipple through her tank, garnering a hissing sound through her teeth and a judder from her small frame. My emotions were just as fragile in the moment—shit, over the past few months.
“I’ve fucked things up so bad, I don’t know where to pick up the pieces. To heal us, Ni?a,” I cried into her ear as I pushed into her.
Zoey felt incredible. She never failed to make me feel more than physical pleasure during sex. Being buried deep inside her made me feel hope for all things. She made me do insane shit. And in this moment, I knew I was fucking up. In this moment, I knew Zoey didn’t want this. I knew I’d forced myself upon her. Although she was enjoying me in the moment, I knew my manipulation got her here. No matter how much I tried, shit always went wrong for us.
Then I felt Zoey’s thighs tighten around me. She tugged at her wrist behind her. Excitedly, I realized she wanted to participate in this more and freed her arms. Her hands swung around my neck, pulling me into her face. She kissed me dizzily, gulping in air from her shaky lungs. I felt my sacs tingle. I needed her breakthrough more than I needed a release. She was my release. Zoey was still my obsession.