She shrugged. “Oh, I don’t know. I can’t imagine he can be either, but if Tegan believes it I’m not sure if I should try to take that away.”
I knew she should. Tegan needed someone to tell her what to do and mean it. If it was up to me I’d ban her from ever seeing him again, hell, I’d ban her from even thinking about him. It wasn’t just the jealously talking either; she needed a clean break from all the bad to focus on healing and moving forwards.
I knocked on her door five minutes later.
“Come in,” she called out.
That made a nice change from her telling me where to go.
She was sitting on her bed watching Family Guy and looking fucking gorgeous. She definitely hadn’t been crying again but she did look sad. Her smile hid nothing.
“Hey.”
“Hi,” she said weakly and patted the bed.
I sat down, crossing my legs at the ankle and looked over at her. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” She laid her head on my shoulder and it was ridiculous how much that small contact made my heart race. “I’m sorry about before, Luke.”
“It’s okay,” I replied.
“It’s not okay. I just needed you to stop talking, but you need to know that I didn’t mean any of it. I really am sorry.”
“You’re forgiven,” I said. She leant around and hugged me, burying her head in the crook of my neck.
I stroked her long hair. “So, does that mean you want to be with me?”
“Luke.” She hesitated and I felt my heart drop. “I just–”
Fuck, why did I go there? I turned my head away, not wanting to look her in the eye when we had the same conversation about how she in fact didn’t want to be with me.
“No, Lucas.” She was pulling my arm so I faced her again “Look, it’s not that I don’t want to be, believe me, I do, I just need to take this slow. Really, really slow.”
“So, you do want to be together?”
“Yes. I just don’t want to rush anything.”
Smiling, I put my arm around her. “Okay, I can do slow. Can I take you on a date? Nothing heavy or serious, just a casual date.”
“Yep,” she replied. “Just don’t expect–”
I held the hand up that wasn’t trapped behind her back. “No expectations, I swear. Where do you want to go?”
Laughing, she replied, “Zoo.”
“Is that the only place you can think of?”
“Apparently. Anyway, you shouldn’t ask me, if you were a real gentleman you would surprise me.”
“You hate surprises.” She shrugged. “Alright then.”
“Alright what?”
“I’ll surprise you.”
She shook her head. “No, I was kidding.”
“You can’t have it both ways, Tegan.”
“Yes, I can, I have breasts.”
I laughed and tilted my head, getting lost in eyes that held so much hurt. “Thank you.”
“For?”
“Giving me a chance.”
“I’m giving us a chance. Just be patient with me.”
I had a feeling this was going to take all the patience I had but I was willing to give it a go. I had to make things better for her and see what these feelings I had for her were all about.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Tegan
I didn’t know why I’d insisted on taking it slow. He traced the back of my hand with his thumb. Going slow was stupid. I hand nothing to lose. So what if it went horribly wrong and he realised I wasn’t worth it in a few months – or weeks – time? At least we would’ve had some fun.
I looked up at him. “Lucas?”
Glancing down, half watching the TV, he replied, “Yeah?”
“I changed my mind.”
I had his full focus then. “What?”
Christ, he was slow. I hooked my leg over his and sat up so I was straddling him. Yeah, this was definitely a good idea. His eyebrows shot up but it took only a second for his hands to grip my waist.
“Are you actually going to kiss me, Luke?”
Laughing once, he pulled me closer and his lips touched mine lightly. He was a tease but I liked the way his breath tickled my skin and gave me goose bumps. Groaning, his hand slid up my side and into my hair. I wasn’t sure how long I could sit on his lap, a centimetre from his face and not kiss him. My skin was on fire. Everything was on fire and he was doing nothing but look at me and copping a feel of the side boob as he went up.
Whatever self-control he had vanished quickly and then he kissed me hard, desperate and so deep it made my toes curl and my body arch into him.
He pulled away slightly and whispered against my mouth, “Are you sure you want to do this?”
I wasn’t sure of anything anymore but he made me feel…something. “I’m sure,” I replied. He kissed me again until we were both panting and things were starting to get a little bit more heated. I could feel how aroused he was and I was reaching the point where I’d just think ‘fuck it’ and strip him. Something was shouting, screaming that it wasn’t a good idea and this time I couldn’t ignore it.