“You know there’s no fun in that.” Nick said, taking another chunk out of his apple.
“Where’s Ava?” Luke said, ignoring him.
“She fell asleep about twenty minutes ago.” He studied Luke for a moment. “So you’re really not going to give me any gossip.”
“You’re really becoming too in touch with your feminine side.” Luke said flatly and walked into the living room. No Cara. He walked towards the kitchen and stopped short when he heard her talking to Sam.
“I’m sorry he called you guys over here. I know you probably have a ton of shit to do before you leave tomorrow night.” Cara said softly.
“Are you kidding me? It’s no big deal, I’m just glad you’re okay. Luke was really bent out of shape when he called. He was worried.”
“I get it but he takes things to the extreme.” Cara said. “My phone died.”
Sam bit down on her lip, hesitating for the slightest moment. “Cara did Luke ever bring up Marie to you?”
Cara drew her eyebrows together while shaking her head. “No, why?”
“Well, it’s just you guys are getting close and I figured he would’ve mentioned…” She was cut off by the swinging door. Luke stepped into the kitchen and his eyes shot to Cara.
“Babe, you ready?” Nick asked from behind Luke. “The snow tapered off, I say we blow this popsicle stand before we get stuck with Grumpy over here.” He said pointing his thumb at Luke.
“I’m not grumpy.” Luke mumbled miserably.
Cara looked at Nick. “Do you mind dropping me off on the way?” She turned to Luke. “I can’t stay here and leave Benny by himself.”
“I picked up Benny hours ago.” Luke said flatly. He had picked up Benny when he first went in search for Cara, hoping he would catch her at her apartment.
“Benny is upstairs. He followed Nick when he carried Ava to bed.” Sam offered, watching Luke’s face falter.
“Oh.” Cara said as the intensity in Luke’s eyes ripped through her.
Sam stood up and walked over to Cara, giving her a tight hug. Sensing the tension between Luke and Cara she leaned into her ear.
“Give him a break.” Sam whispered pulling back and turning to her brother. She kissed his cheek.
“Thanks for coming.” He said roughly.
“Anytime, we’ll call you tomorrow before we leave.” She said with a smile.
“Cara, glad to see you’re in one piece.” Nick said with a nod before turning to Luke. “Pull the stick out of your ass, Grumpy.”
Luke ignored Nick while keeping his gaze steady on Cara. A few moments later he heard the front door close and knew they were alone.
“You mind explaining why you’re angry with me? He said as he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the doorway of the kitchen.”
“I don’t know Luke, let’s see, I saw my old man who I haven’t seen in what? Fifteen years? The man I despise more than anything, the man who was supposed to raise me and nurture me not beat the shit out of me and verbally abuse me. There he was being the ideal father to another young girl. Seeing him and her, my sister…” She said the words as if they were venom on the tip of her tongue. “It made me remember how weak, I am… and how I can’t face a goddamn problem on my own without any sort of aide. I wanted to get high, so bad and just forget I ever saw them but I didn’t. I drove myself to a meeting. I’m standing in front of you right now and I’m clean and I’m not ignoring that I was thrown for a loop today and that it cut me deep. I needed to be able to do that for myself.” She swallowed and watched him drop his hands to his side. “My phone died. I wasn’t intentionally ignoring you. I wasn’t trying to drive you crazy with worry. I was just trying not to fuck up my sobriety and that was my number one concern.” She paused and looked away. “You deserve better than me Luke. You deserve someone who you can rely on because the entire fucking world relies on you. You deserve someone who can put you first because you’ve put everyone else first. I can’t be that person right now. I don’t know if I can ever put you before my sobriety and the struggle to hold onto it.” She ran her fingers through her hair roughly.
He blinked. “What are you saying right now?” His heart was in his throat.
Her shoulders slumped as she drew out a breath. “I’m saying I’m sorry.” She stepped closer to him. “Luke, I’m so scared of everything right now. I’m scared of what I saw today, of how I felt and most of all, after listening to you at the church, I’m scared of losing you.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” He said in that gruff tone of his before he let out a sigh of relief. He understood that she was dealing with a lot and one minute she felt one way and the next another, but the push and pull of it all was driving him mad. He wasn’t used to not being in control of a situation and then he realized he hadn’t been in control over anything since Jake passed away. Not saving him. Not honoring his promise. Not falling for Cara. Not a damn thing.