“Go on…” She urged and repositioned herself on the couch, tucking her legs underneath her.
He sighed, trying to tear his eyes from her chest. “I was angry with her. The last few weeks of her pregnancy, we barely spoke. She had a doctor’s appointment every week and, other than taking her to and from the appointment, she wanted nothing to do with me. I honestly remember being scared she wouldn’t call when she went into labor but she did. Her aunt took her to the hospital and I met them there.”
“Where were her parents?”
“Her parents moved down to Florida when we first started dating. She didn’t want to leave New York and stayed with her Aunt Vicky. Anyhow, she had a rough delivery.”
“That I remember. I was at the hospital.” She smiled as she remembered waiting in the waiting room with the Lanza’s.
“I know.” He said, remembering when he finally walked into the waiting room, wearing scrubs, and staring into the faces of his expectant family. He was smiling so wide when he announced he had a daughter. His parents cried, Sam ran to him and Jake lifted Cara and spun her around in a circle, before they all demanded to meet the little angel.
“I may not have planned for Ava, or on being a single parent, but she is the greatest joy of my life.” He said hoarsely before he blew out a breath. “I stayed in the hospital around the clock with Marie. She barely held her in the two days we were there. When they were discharged from the hospital, she took Ava and sent me on my way. I was allowed to visit in the mornings and before the last feeding. Then one day she showed up at my parent’s house with the baby and said she made a mistake. I thought first, that she had given her the wrong formula or something silly that new parents don’t realize, but she shoved Ava into my arms.” He shook his head. “She told me she didn’t want her. That she didn’t want a child and had made a huge mistake. And as quickly as she said the words was as quickly as she was gone. I couldn’t take off after her, because I had Ava. I couldn’t do a goddamn thing to stop her and a part of me didn’t want to, if she could bring herself to say those words than she didn’t deserve to be Ava’s mother.”
“But eventually you reached out to her.” Cara remembered the devastation in his eyes.
“Yeah, but she was gone. She never picked up her phone. In fact, she changed the number. Her Aunt Vicky told me that she packed up her car and drove to Florida before she threatened to have me locked up for acting like a lunatic on her front lawn. I kept trying to get in touch with her and there was no way to, until one day when the certified papers came in the mail stating she signed over all her rights to me. She even requested for her name to be taken off of Ava’s birth certificate.” He sighed. “That was the last we heard from her.” He shrugged his shoulders. “Her loss.”
“You aren’t kidding.” Cara said, moving closer to him on the couch. “I’m sorry I didn’t get in touch with you and that you had worried about me.” She said softly.
“One thing has nothing to do with the other, but do me a favor, yeah?” He said as he lifted his arm off the back of the couch and brushed a fallen strand of hair behind her ear. “If you don’t want to be here, don’t be. Don’t be here because you think it’s what I want or because it’s convenient for the time being. Be here because it where your gut is telling you to be.”
“The funny thing is there are a million and one reasons I should be by myself yet the only place I want to be is here with you. And it’s not just my gut telling me so.”
He leaned towards her closing the distance between them. “Say it again.” He demanded in that gruff tone of his. His hands cupped her face and when she remained silent he tilted her face upward and bent his head to crash his lips against hers. His lips worked her lower one, his tongue sneaking out for a teasing taste. “Say it.” He murmured against her mouth.
Every fear that she wasn’t good enough or that she was too broken to be a part of his life vanished from her brain and all she could think of was how badly she needed to taste him. He pulled his mouth from hers and stared into her hooded eyes.
“Say you want to be here.” He said running the pad of his thumb along her lower lip. His gaze dipped to her pouty lips and he sucked in a breath. “Say it.” He said sternly.
She swallowed. “There’s no place else I want to be. I want to be here with you.” She whispered, barely getting the words out as his mouth crashed over her desperately. Her fingers ran wildly through his hair, tugging on the ends, pressing his mouth firmly against hers. She opened her mouth and her tongue pushed past his lips, gliding over his. His tongue danced against hers, together battling for who could feed their hunger first. He gripped the cheeks of her ass and slid her onto his lap, her legs wrapping around his waist.
He pulled away and searched her eyes. “Is this okay?” He asked hoarsely.