He let out a broken exhale. “I’ll miss you too, Jessie.”
They reluctantly pulled apart from each other, neither one wanting to let go, but both knowing they had to. Kai cupped her cheek when they were a foot apart, searching her face like he was memorizing it. Then he kissed her forehead. Jessie closed her eyes as he murmured into her skin, “Goodbye, cousin.”
He stepped away from her so she could open the door. With her hand clenching the doorknob so hard she knew she’d be bruised in the morning, Jessie spent long seconds gazing at him—his exotic beauty—the stunning eyes, the deep skin, the intricate swirls of his hidden tattoo. And all of his physical attractiveness overshadowed by the goodness in his heart—it seared her. Jessie didn’t think she’d ever love anyone else the way that she loved him. Her voice calmer than it had been since she’d entered this fateful apartment, she told him, “I love you, Kai.”
His lips curled into a small, sad smile. “I love you too…Jessica Marie.”
Kai woke up Monday morning feeling a ripping pain in his stomach that he hadn’t felt since he’d first discovered the truth about Jessie. He knew what he had to do, and he knew it was the right thing to do, but that didn’t make his decision any easier. If anything, it was harder. Because a part of him wanted to ignore what was right. A part of him wanted to race to the woman he loved, a woman who loved him back. They’d finally admitted it to each other, and instead of the declaration being a heartwarming moment that brought two people together, it was driving them apart. Thousands of miles apart.
Sitting up on his bed, Kai stared at the river rock photograph that Jessie had given to him. She was so caring, so wonderful. He couldn’t imagine his life without her in it. But he had to go. It was time to return to the home he’d left behind. Life had been so simple when he’d boarded the plane to come out here. Thinking about how different the return flight was going to be filled Kai with dread. It was going to be so hard to leave, especially with Jessie there, seeing him off.
Kai sniffed and stared at his sheets. That might be the last time they see each other. Ever. He couldn’t truly comprehend it, and tried to think of ways around the finality of that ending. Maybe they could try not seeing each other again. Maybe, if Kai cut off all ties with April and Harmony, he’d lessen his chances of running into Jessie. But Gran…there was no way around that one. Their mutual grandmother was big on family togetherness. Although, even she wouldn’t approve of the level of togetherness Kai and Jessie had. But she’d make staying here and remaining separate from Jessie impossible. Eventually she would force them together, just like she had this past weekend.
Kai could already see at least a half-dozen times where they would have to be together—Christmas, Gran’s birthday, Kai’s birthday, Jessie’s birthday, Easter, Grandpa and Gran’s anniversary, one she still celebrated every year, even after his death. Sighing, he got out of bed and trudged to the bathroom. He’d somehow managed to fake an illness that had gotten him out of Thanksgiving dinner a while ago, but Kai couldn’t do that every time there was a family event. Not without raising some serious red flags. No, there was just no way they could remain here together and not see each other.
Turning on the shower, Kai recommitted himself to leaving. It was the only way to stop them from loving each other the way they wanted to—man to woman, boyfriend to girlfriend…husband to wife. Kai scrubbed his face to erase that thought from his brain. That was most definitely not an option.
Kai and Jessie weren’t anything but family. Kai had even made that distinction when he’d professed his feelings for her. As he ran his hand under the warm water, he wondered if Jessie had caught the significance of what he’d said. He’d called her by her full name, a name that only family called her. Because even though he might not think of her that way, there was no denying who she was. In his head, she might be Jessie, the warm, caring girl he’d met at a club one night, but in reality, she was Jessica Marie, his first cousin, by blood. And while he might be able to fool himself into believing their relationship was okay one day, the blood didn’t lie, and there was no getting around the fact that they were family.
No, being together…wasn’t an option.