Buzz took the decision away from her. One moment he was gazing at her with the cool indifference of a man who was the epitome of control. The next he reached for her, grasping her biceps and pulled her toward him.
He didn’t ask for permission to kiss her. His mouth came down on hers like a bird of prey swooping down for a kill. The fierceness of the kiss took her breath. For an instant, he possessed her, and despite her resolve not to make a mistake, she reveled in the sensation. Her brain ordered her to pull back, but the hot desire coursing through her body banked the order with military precision. Instead she opened to him, and he went in deep. Sensation streaked through her body like electricity and exploded in her brain like a bomb. The sleeping bag she’d been wrapped in fell away from her. Vaguely, she was aware of the cool night air on her back. She gasped when his hands went to her breasts. He molded her and her body jolted with pleasure, arching against him and all she could think was that she wanted more.
He tore at his clothes as he kissed her. Desperate to feel his bare flesh against hers, she reached for the snap of his jeans, but her brain was so overwhelmed she couldn’t manage. When he pulled away to work off his shirt, Kelly opened her eyes, found herself looking at his bare chest. He was leaner than she remembered, but his muscles were more defined. A dark blanket of hair covered his chest and ran in a thin line down to the waistband of his low-rise jeans.
He never took his eyes from her as he worked the jeans over his narrow hips. She watched him undress, mesmerized by the stark male beauty of his body. The sensuality of the moment overwhelmed her. She felt as if someone had doused her with gasoline and set her aflame. She was burning from the inside out, and the sensation was only increased by the desperate knowledge that this would be their last time together.
When he leaned forward and kissed her it was with a gentleness that brought tears to her eyes. That a man like Buzz could be so gentle with her was profound and it moved her as nothing else could have. Kelly wasn’t much of a crier, but a muffled sob escaped her. She felt Buzz stiffen. Then he pulled away slightly and looked at her with a puzzled look.
“Don’t stop,” she whispered.
“Kel, if you don’t want to do this—”
“I do. I want this…too much.”
“Why are you crying?”
“I’m not.”
“Kel…for Pete’s sake, yes you are.”
“Because I want this. Because it’s a mistake, but I want this anyway.”
She could feel him shaking with tension and restraint and uncertainty. She could feel that same tension zinging through her own body. He stared at her, his expression cautious and puzzled. Because she knew he wouldn’t proceed without some kind of encouragement from her, she leaned forward and brushed her lips across his.
That was all it took. In one smooth movement, he unzipped the sleeping bag and slid in beside her. The hard length of his body against hers shocked her. He felt solid and warm and strong beside her. It had been so long since she’d been with a man—since she’d been with Buzz—she’d forgotten what it was like. But her body remembered. Oh, yes, her body remembered.
When he moved over her, she opened to him. He looked down at her and she wanted to cry out with the joy of holding him close. She tried not to think about tomorrow or next week or next month. She tried not to think about what it would be like to walk away from him for the last time.
“I haven’t been with anyone since that last night,” he said.
The words shocked her. She’d assumed he’d moved on with his life. Over the years, she’d thought of him often, wondering if he’d found someone special, never letting herself examine too closely how that made her feel.
“That’s a long time,” she said.
“Some things are worth waiting for.”
His kiss devastated her, shook her all the way to her core. He worked her mouth with his, nipping at her lips, their tongues sparring. She moved restlessly beneath him, arousal burning her, making her impatient.
“Please,” she said, breaking the kiss.
“Not yet.”
She withheld a cry when he took her nipple into his mouth. Buzz had always been a patient lover. But she felt feverish. Unzipping the bag slightly, he moved lower, kissing the heated flesh of her belly, dipping his tongue into her navel, leaving a wet trail as he worked his way lower.
Her control left her when his lips brushed over the crisp curls at her V. She knew what he was going to do next. While the part of her she needed to protect cried out against the intimacy of the act, another side of her pleaded for him to continue, for him to touch her in the most intimate way a man could touch a woman.
“Don’t be afraid,” he whispered. “I won’t hurt you.”