Lube and Tune
April, 2002
“Hunny, you know what your problem is?”
“That’s good news-- I only have one?”
“You need to get laid.”
“Well unless I can screw myself, I don’t see that happening anytime soon. Leo’s knee deep into this Hedge thing and I can’t find a two-day gap in my schedule to make the quick trip to New York. Besides, even if Kurt picked Kendall up from school on a Friday afternoon, it only gives me thirty-seven hours with Leo until I have to be back on Sunday. Hardly satisfying.”
“Why don’t you just ask Kurt to take her for an extra day?”
“No way! It’s not what Kelly wanted.”
“Well I bet she didn’t want your huha to go to waste either! And, would you look at yourself? You’re starting to look like…a mom.”
Walking over to a full length mirror in one of the studios, I too am repulsed by what I’m looking at. The roots of my blond hair are grown out to Courtney Love-like proportions, my eyebrows are now an eyebrow and my outfit looks like something I pulled out of the lost and found.
“Tsk-tsk...You’re starting to look like Barbara before I got my hands on her.”
“Oh my God, when did this happen?”
“December. When Leo left.”
“I better make some appointments and get myself back on track. He’s supposed to move back next month.”
Exhaling as I look in the mirror and play with the dark strands of hair dangling in my eyes, “I’ve got to do something about this. One look at me and he’ll rip this ring off of my finger and catch the first flight back to New York.”
“Here doll, this should help.”
Taking a small red box from the palm of my sweet Slutty Co-worker’s hand, I flash her a look that says, “what have you done?” Then I open it.
“Oh my gosh, this is a two day spa retreat at The Ritz Carlton in Half Moon Bay! ARE YOU SERIOUS?”
“Yep, and you better get going. Your cut and color starts in two hours! And hunny…do yourself a favor and wax more than those eyebrows. If the carpet matches the drapes…you’re in some serious trouble!”
Jumping up and down like a four-year old, my rejoicing comes to an abrupt halt when I remember I have a four-year-old.
“Shit. I can’t go. Kendall.”
“Such a good mommy. But, even the best mommies need a break. It’s all taken care of.”
“How?”
“Megan’s picking up Kendall from school and taking her to Kurt’s.”
Adamantly shaking my head, “I can’t ask her to do that.”
“You didn’t, I did. Listen, it’s his two days with her anyway, who cares who delivers her to him. Besides, she wants to talk to him about that Nepal charity crap.” Placing my car keys in my hand and nudging me out the door, “All you have to do is go home to pack your bag. Oh! And hunny, here’s one more little gift. But don’t open it until you’re told to.”
“Told to by who?”
“Me. I’ll call you tonight. Now get going!”
On the way to The Ritz, in between shaking the box that Slutty Co-worker told me not to open, I try to call Leo to tell him about my surprise. But to my disappointment he never picks up. Never-the-less, I make it to my afternoon of pampered bliss and immediately forget about the letdown of not hearing his voice. I get cut, colored, massaged, waxed, mani’d and pedi’d to absolute death and then float out of the spa and into my room where I order room service. After staring at myself in the mirror and proudly proclaiming, “Now there’s my girl!” I get all cozy in a big white fluffy robe and then make my way to the balcony to enjoy the ocean view. My enjoyment is immediately disrupted by the countless number of couples I see walking hand in hand along the shoreline. Just as I’m beginning to feel sad about being all alone at such a fabulous resort, a loud knock pulls me away from the melancholy moment. I pull my robe tighter as I make my way to the door and open it expecting to find my Cobb salad.
“Oh my God! Leo!”
Rushing into his arms, I nearly knock him over, kissing his face, his neck, his eyes, his ears…anywhere my lips land.
“Are you really here?”
He cups my face in his hands and with that voice that will forever spellbind me, he says, “Yes, baby, I’m really here.”
It’s been months since I’ve had his arms around me and I’ll die if I have to go that long without them again. There’s so much to talk about, so many details about our new life together with Kendall, and so many things I want to know about his new business, but everything can wait because there is so much about each other’s body that we have to get reacquainted with.
Closing the door with his foot and throwing his bag to the ground, Leo keeps one hand on my neck while he kisses me and unties my robe with the other. Thank you, Lord Jesus, who I’m still struggling to believe in…I’m soooo glad I paid extra to get the super lube and tune wax job! I tear off his belt and rip the buttons off of his shirt while trying to remove it. The scent of him makes my legs go weak and each inhalation makes them weaker. Every girl part attached to my body is throbbing and I don’t care about anything other than having him inside me. Mercifully, within thirty seconds of laying eyes on my love, that’s exactly where he is.
Over and over again I keep saying, “I never want you to stop, I never want you to stop.” Breathlessly, he whispers back, “Not until you tell me to, baby…not until you tell me to.”
My hands travel from his shoulders to his forearms and then back up, taking in all of his strength. Then they trail down the middle of his back and rest on the lower part of his hips where I can feel his muscles tighten with every thrust. I’m in absolute heaven with his intoxicating smell, his breathless confidence and his powerful focus until…
“Oh my God! Stop! Stop! Stop!”
Slowing down but not leaving me, he smiles and says “No way, baby.”
Pushing him off of me, “I’m serious, Leo! You have to take it out!”
Now lying beside me, he breathlessly admits, “That didn’t go as well as I planned.”
Out of breath myself, I explain, “I’m not on any birth control. I never got that other shot, and I have no idea when my last period was. Jesus, it’s like I can’t keep track of anything anymore!”
Climbing back on top of me like he could care less about what I just said, I push him away again.
“Are you crazy? We just got Kendall! We can’t risk another one, not right now.”
“Remember the night we met?”
“Yeah…”
“Did you plan for it to happen?”
“That would be a big, NO!”
“Would you say meeting me was the best thing to ever happen to you?”
“Of course.”
“Do you still plan on marrying me?”
“Leo! Yes and why are you asking me these questions?”
“Remember that one time we were in Monterey and I pointed out that woman who was pregnant and I told you I couldn’t wait until you looked like her.”
“How could I ever forget?”
“I meant what I said. Chrissy, not one damn thing about our relationship has been conventional.” Now laughing, “The timing of us having a baby is irrelevant to me…” Moving back on top of me, “…it’s the fact that we’ll be together forever that matters.”
Still pushing him, “Your wooing words are charming, but I want everything to be perfect, Leo.”
“And what does perfect mean?”
“It means you’ll be home with me and Kendall. That she has some time to settle into our new family. Shit…so we ALL have time to settle into our new family. Perfect means you won’t miss one day of my morning sickness, my first ultra-sound…my expanding waistline.”
“Then I guess I’m outta here.”
Standing to put his pants on, I tug at his hem and ask where he’s going.
“The drug store.” Smiling down at me, “I’m not done with you. Oh, and open that box while I’m gone. The spa was my gift to you and that’s your gift to me.”
“So this whole thing was your idea?”
“Yep.” And then he bent down to kiss me before saying “I’ll be back in ten minutes,” and then he dashed out the door.
I almost opened the door to beg him not to leave, but resisted the urge because I knew there would be no sex on the menu if he stayed. So, while Leo was gone I ordered another Cobb salad for him and opened the box. When he returned, I was wearing the lingerie he entrusted Slutty Co-worker to buy for me. It was surprisingly tasteful and fit like a glove…and it came off just as easy as one.
The remainder of our weekend was a dream. We hardly left the bed and spent countless hours talking about Kendall, our wedding and the success of T.L. Capital. Apparently, not only are they going to open up an office in California, but Texas as well. The forty-eight hours we spent at The Ritz was long over-due time together needed to plan our future, and I could’ve continued to do it long into the future, but Sunday rolled around and Leo had to catch his flight back to New York and I had to be home by five o’clock to meet Kendall who was being delivered by Kurt. Hearing Kurt’s name come out of my mouth was obviously hard for Leo to digest, but for the first time in four years he didn’t clench his fists when it happened. It looks like he dug deep and things might be okay with the visitation arrangement after all. Two days after I opened the door to him, I have to open it again to let him out.
“Do you have to go back?”
“Unfortunately, yes.”
“I guess it’s just for one more month.” Hugging him tightly, “I think I can make it.”
“Chrissy I have something to tell you. I waited until now because I didn’t want to ruin the weekend.”
Pulling back a little, “You’re scaring me.”
“It’s not scary, I promise. It’s just that I have to stay in New York until July to help Taddeo with the Texas deal.”
“What? No!”
“I only need an extra six weeks and I can get what I need done. I promise, I wouldn’t do it if it wasn’t important.”
“But, it’s been so long already and Kendall probably doesn’t even remember what you look like!”
“But she knows what I sound like. We talk on the phone all of the time.”
“It’s not the same! Damn it, Leo, I don’t wanna live like this anymore.”
Pulling me back into him, “It’s hard for me too. But, what I’m doing is for the rest of our lives. We can make it six more weeks, can’t we?”
Just like I remember doing in Dr. Maria’s office so many years ago, I nod my head yes like it’s no biggie, but the hole in my heart that’s flashing a big neon vacancy sign says otherwise.