“I’m going to the police station to tell them what I’ve done.”
“You mean what you were coerced and blackmailed into doing?” All of a sudden I was filled with rage that Kyle had tried to ruin someone else’s life. However mad I was, I was even sadder knowing he had probably succeeded a little with Brittany. Even from the grave he was still causing pain. “Brittany, there is no active investigation right now about the missing money. We hired a P.I. because we were curious as to how he did it. But no one is looking to press charges against you. You did nothing wrong.” Brittany looked at the ground and nodded her head, but she still looked defeated. I couldn’t imagine what she was thinking, or the bravery it took for her to come here and tell her story. “You’ll go to the police station, Brittany, but not to turn yourself in, to give a statement, to aid them, perhaps, but that is all.”
Porter reinstated his purposeful march across the room, angry steps leaving angry thumps in their wake. Mattie slept peacefully as years of drama unfolded around her. I watched Brittany and she looked down to her lap and cried, softly mumbling how she never meant to hurt anyone.
We were all better off now that he was dead.
It was a harsh statement. It was also a true statement. He hurt more people than he helped. If I hadn’t defended myself last year, if I hadn’t killed him, not only would I be dead, but he’d still be hurting other people. Brittany might still be under his thumb. For the first time in maybe ever, the guilt over killing another person wasn’t weighing so heavily down on me.
Once she’d quieted down and pulled herself together a little bit more, Brittany stood and made to leave. I hugged her and tried to remind her that none of this was her fault, that what he had done was wrong. She nodded at my words, but I knew she wasn’t agreeing with me. It would probably take her a very long time to accept that fact, but I hoped that someday she would. She told me she would go to the police station straight from the hospital and I gave her Dillard’s name, telling her to only talk to him. I hugged her again and then watched her walk out of the room.
My eyes found Porter and they were wide, my mouth hanging open a little, completely and totally shocked at what the last hour of our lives had left us with.
“Can you believe any of that?” I asked him, hoping he was just as shocked as I was.
“I know I’ve said this before, but he’s lucky he’s dead already, because otherwise I’d find him and finish him off myself. What a worthless waste of a human being.”
“He seemed so normal . . .”
“Yeah, well, if all the crazy douchebags of the world would wear neon flashing signs around their necks warning us all, the world would be a better place.”
I had to laugh at the image of Kyle with a sign hanging from his neck flashing the words “Deranged Psychopath.” I let out a sigh, finding that all the day’s events were finally catching up and finding me exhausted.
“Have you thought about what you’re going to do tomorrow?” His voice was light and concerned all at the same time. I could feel his need to protect me as a physical force, his need to keep me safe wafting over me. I nodded and met his eyes.
“I’m going to go to the trial.”
He nodded, silently, then ventured another question.
“And you trust your mom enough to leave Mattie here with her?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know if I trust my mom, or sister, or Kalli, or anyone enough to be here with Mattie without me. But it doesn’t matter, because the only other person on the planet I’d leave her with is going to be here with her—you.”
His eyes grew wide in surprise and he took a few steps towards me. I kept my face still, not letting my feelings show as he moved closer to me. I’d seen Porter get worked up quite a few times since we’d been together, and I knew he would never hurt me, but this was fury I’d never seen Porter direct at me before.
“You’re crazy if you think I’m going to let you testify tomorrow, even be in the same room as that poor excuse for a man, without me.” His finger was pointed angrily at me, his voice was firm and furious, and his eyes were wild. He was really scared. And I knew he would be. This was exactly the reaction I was expecting from him. Even though I knew he was furious, it made me smile.
“Porter, the only place I need you tomorrow, is here, with our baby.” I stood up and walked to him, taking his hand in mine and wrapping his arms around my waist. “I have no doubt that I can testify tomorrow, on my own, just fine. And I would love it if you could be there with me, holding my hand, and offering me sweet words of comfort, just like I know you would. But I need to know that Mattie isn’t alone, isn’t sensing that we’re both gone and wondering where we’ve went. That would hurt me more than anything. So you need to stay here. Can you do that for me?”