Destined to Change

chapter 6



Loralei



The next few days were great. Jaxon and I spent every minute we could together. The fact that we worked together was really convenient. That's one of the perks of being the boss, you can make-out with your farmhand boyfriend in every possible place you can think of on the farm. The barn, the field, the garage, the garden, my office - so many places, so little time.

I walked into one of the horse stalls and suddenly felt warm breath on the back of my neck.

“Morning, babe,” Jaxon said, placing a kiss on my neck. I felt his tongue as he licked a trail from my ear to my jaw. I shivered from my head to my toes.

“Jaxon, stop. Someone will see us.”

“No, they won’t. Everyone went into town for the sale this morning. We have the barn all to ourselves. Of course, we have to share it with the horses, but I don’t think they’ll mind if we roll around in their hay for a bit.”

I turned to face him. “Did you just insinuate that I would roll around in the hay with you?”

He nuzzled my neck and nipped at my ear. “Why yes, ma’am. I believe I did.” He laughed against my neck and pushed me onto the bales of hay in the corner of the stall.

I giggled as he was fumbling with the buttons on my shirt. “You need help with that, stud?”

Jaxon pulled away. “You know I hate it when the guys call me that, but when you do it, it really turns me on.” The sexy smirk was back. “I’ll make you think stud.” He kissed me hard.

As his tongue thrust into my mouth, I pulled my knees up so I could get him closer to me. He pressed into me and let out the sexiest moan. “God, you feel so good. I want to bury myself inside you, and never come out.”

“Then do it already. Please, Jaxon, I’m ready. I need to be with you.” I was breathing heavy and probably sounded like a crazy person.

“Not like this, Lor. Not out in the barn, literally rolling in the hay. It needs to be special.”

“How about tonight? My parents are keeping the kids. We’d have the whole house to ourselves.”

Before I got the words out of my mouth, he picked me up off of the hay and started swinging me around in circles. “Whoa, calm down stud. I’ll take that as a yes?”

He stopped spinning and sat me down. “Yes, for you the answer is always yes.”

The rest of the afternoon dragged. It seemed like the day would never end. I got home and called my mom to make sure the kids were okay. I told them to get their homework done, be good for their grandparents, have sweet dreams, and mommy would see them tomorrow.

I could do this, right? It’s just sex, Loralei. I tried to tell myself it was just sex, I really did. But it felt like so much more. Like when Declan and I were together, it wasn’t about the sex, it was about our connection. It was about our future. I felt like this night with Jaxon was going to change things.

I was an excited, scared ball of nerves. We were going to be together. He could be my future. And that was huge. If he was going to be in my life, that meant he was also going to be a part of my kid’s lives. I had thought of nothing else since that first night we spent together. I had finally come to the conclusion that I loved him, and he wasn’t going anywhere. So, yeah, I decided I could do this.

I took a long, hot shower. Towel dried my hair and put on my sexiest nightgown. While I was searching for something to wear, I realized I probably should have gone with Ems one of the many times she invited me, to pick out something sexier. My sexiest nightgown was just a short, white baby-doll gown. It was trimmed in lace and very feminine. Not super sexy, but I had to work with what I had.

I left my hair down and went downstairs to the kitchen. I decided maybe a glass of wine would help calm my nerves. I poured a large glass and headed to the living room to wait for Jaxon. When I walked into the room, my eyes immediately flew to the mantle, to the picture of Declan and I. I walked over to it, picked it up, and almost cried. Almost.

My feelings were changing. Declan would always be my first love. But I was starting to realize that he wasn’t the only love of my life. Jaxon had done this. He had made me forget, no not forget, I could never forget my past. But he had made me reevaluate my future, or my destiny.

Tonight would change everything, but I wasn’t nervous anymore. It was like Declan had released me. Something had happened in my head and my heart. Something that made me know how right tonight was going to be. How right Jaxon was for me and my future. Tonight was going to be life-changing.

When I heard the motorcycle barreling down my driveway, I went into the kitchen and rinsed my wine glass and put it in the dishwasher. I didn’t want Jaxon to think I had to drink to do this.

He knocked on the door and I ran to answer it in just my nightgown. He was dressed in his signature “fancy pants” and a blue Eagles t-shirt. His shaggy hair was perfectly tousled and those big brown eyes were taking in every inch of my body.

I cleared my throat, and he finally made eye contact. “Babe, you do realize that sexy-ass nightgown is completely see-through in the light? You may have just given me a heart attack.” His eyes were lingering on my breasts. Men - they’re all the same.

“We have plans tonight, mister. You can’t die on me now.” He walked in the house and immediately picked me up and pressed me against the wall.

He whispered in my ear, “I don’t plan on dying until I see you with that gown off.”

Thank goodness he was holding me up, because those words, and the way he said them, almost caused my knees to give out. He kissed my neck right below my ear, and made his way up to my ear. He nibbled on my earlobe, and I giggled.

In a low, sultry voice he said, “You know how I feel about you laughing at me.” He kissed me, picked me up, and started carrying me upstairs toward my bedroom.

We were still kissing when he sat me down at the foot of the bed. He looked down at me through those long lashes and grabbed the hem of my nightgown, pulling it over my head. I stood in front of him in just my white panties. I instinctively crossed my arms over my naked chest. Even though he had seen my breasts before, it was just an instinct to cover them.

“Please don’t do that, babe. I want to see and experience all of you. Please don’t be nervous or shy. It’s me, and I love you. I don’t plan on having sex with you tonight, Loralei. What we are going to do means so much more to me than just sex. I’m going to make love to you. I’m going to show you how much I love you. And I want you to feel comfortable enough to tell me what you want or don’t want. I want you to know that you can’t do anything wrong here. We love each other and anything we do in bed together will be perfect. Now, I want to ask you one more time, are you sure you're ready for this?”

I was in awe of this man. His words just melted my heart, not to mention what they did to my panties. I didn’t answer him. Instead I reached for the hem of his t-shirt and pulled it over his head. Then I unzipped his jeans and slid them down to the floor. He kicked them off and we both stood in silence, staring at each other. Jaxon placed his hand on my cheek and started to gently rub his thumb back and forth over it. He leaned in and placed a very soft kiss on my lips. I needed more. I threw my arms around his neck and pulled him toward me. I kissed him with everything in me. I wanted him, and I wasn’t going to wait another minute.

He pressed me back onto the bed. His lips never left mine while he laid down beside me on the bed. He slowed the kiss down. I couldn’t control the whimper I released when he pulled his lips from mine. There was that sexy smirk again.

“You miss me already? I’m not going anywhere, Lor. You are mine.” He kissed my neck and moved down to my breasts. He was caressing one with his hand and kissing the other. I couldn’t decide which felt better. They both felt pretty amazing. He kept looking up at me. I couldn’t take my eyes of him. He was so beautiful.

He removed his hand from my breast and slid it down to my panties. Never breaking eye contact, he removed my panties. Then he leaned up and started looking at me, like really looking at me. When his gaze got to my c-section scar, he leaned down and placed soft kisses along it. It felt amazing, but I was shaking. He was getting really close to the place I wanted him to be.

“Babe, are you okay?”

I guess he felt me shaking and it worried him. “I’m just a little nervous.”

He stopped what he was doing, gave me a long, sweet kiss and said, “What did I tell you, Lor? There is no reason to be nervous. It’s just me. I love you.”

I shook my head. “Maybe I wouldn’t be so nervous if I wasn’t the only one lying here naked.”

“Your wish is my command.” He took off his boxers and I was shocked. Okay, yes I was shocked to see his penis, but I was even more shocked to see that.

I guess I was staring, because he said, “Remember when Sammy asked me about my piercings? I didn’t tell him I didn’t have one, I just told him we shouldn’t talk about it. If it scares you, I can take it out.”

I reached down and touched it. Jaxon let out a small gasp. I asked, “Um, will it hurt me?”

“No, babe, it will feel really, really good. I promise.”

Jaxon started kissing me again. He pulled away from my lips and his mouth trailed down my stomach toward my inner thighs. He said, “I want to kiss you there, Lor. Do you want me to do that?” I couldn’t speak, I nodded. He pressed his face into me. “You smell amazing. I cannot wait to taste you.”

Before I could think about what was happening, his tongue was inside me. He was licking me and then he was sucking my *. He grazed it with his teeth and everything went blurry. I arched my back, which only made his tongue go deeper and I screamed out, “Oh my God.”

Once I came down from my glorious high, he climbed up to my mouth and whispered, “You can just call me Jaxon.”

I had to smile at that.

He placed his knee between my legs and spread them further. “Are you ready?” he asked.

“Yes, Jaxon, I am.”

He was leaning over me and then he started to press himself into me. When I felt the piercing hit my *, I flinched. He stopped, “Okay?”

“It just felt weird, it’s okay. Please keep going.”

He pressed deeper and deeper until he was all the way in. I could feel the piercing the entire time. It had been so long since I had done this; it felt like I never had.

“I’m going to move now, okay? Tell me if you want me to stop.” He started moving. Very slowly at first and then when our bodies became accustomed to each other, he sped up. His piercing was rubbing me and I was getting so close. He was thrusting so hard now. The headboard was hitting the wall. I was moaning, he was moaning. “I’m so close Lor, are you close?’ I nodded and he said, “Let’s come together, okay? Ready?”

I was having a really hard time speaking, but I finally got out, “Yes.”

He started thrusting into me. Once, twice, and then we came together. He was breathing heavy, nuzzling my neck. “I love you, Loralei Harper. Oh my God, I love you.”

We spent the rest of the night holding each other. It was the most amazing night I had had in my twenty-six years. Jaxon and I were in love and nothing could change that.

The next morning when I woke up, I was suddenly panicked. Last night I was so happy to be with Jaxon that I never even thought about it. How did I not think about it? After what happened with Declan, how could I have not thought about a condom? I had never needed birth control before. I honestly didn’t think about it last night. But why didn’t Jaxon? He knew why he was coming over. He knew I hadn’t been with anyone in ten years. He had to know that I wasn’t on birth control.

I had to ask, “Baby, are you awake?”

He peeked at me with one eye, “Yeah, everything okay, babe?”

I just needed to spit it out. We had just spent the night together, so why was asking him this question so embarrassing?

I finally just blurted it out, “Um, why didn’t you use protection last night?”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, “I’m clean, Lor. I knew your history and knew you were too.”

That didn’t really answer the big question though, did it? I didn’t want to get pregnant again, especially not this early in our relationship. With the twins I could write it off as being a careless teenager, but this would be different. “What about getting me pregnant? I’m really not ready for that, Jaxon.”

“I’m sorry, Lor. I don’t know what else to say. I just wasn’t thinking.” That didn’t really calm my nerves any, but I guess it was the best answer I was going to get.

We really needed to get to work. We didn’t want to leave each other, but we knew we would be able to see each other all day.

The next week was great. Jaxon and I spent as much time together as we could. I thought it might be awkward between us, but it was the opposite. It was so easy to talk to him, to be with him. Actually, we wanted to be together all the time. But that was kinda hard to do with the kids and the farm. But we tried to eat lunch together every day.

I was sitting at my desk that morning, when he walked in. He sauntered over to me, picked me up out of my chair, and sat me down on the desk, he slid in between my legs and kissed me so passionately, “I’ve missed you, baby.”

He was doing all of the right things, in all the right places. Before I knew it we were panting and had moved past heavy petting when all of a sudden the door flew open. Jaxon’s eyes shot up and he got this look on his face. This look that said he had been caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to do.

He backed away from me and went running toward the door. I looked over and saw a beautiful blonde woman standing in the doorway with tears in her eyes. She was a very small woman with a perfect body, long blonde hair, and she was wearing a shorter than short mini-skirt with a barely there halter top with 4 inch stilettos. She looked even more out of a place on a farm than Jaxon did.

She screamed at me, “Who the hell are you?” I couldn’t understand why she was so mad at me, why she was crying, or why Jaxon was just standing there staring at her.

“I’m Loralei, and you’re in my office. So, I think I should ask the questions. Who the hell are you?”

The words that came from her mouth literally made my heart break. “I’m his wife.” She pointed at Jaxon. He looked over at me and didn’t say a word. I couldn’t help the tears that came into my eyes.

He finally spoke, “Stacy, please wait outside. I need to speak to Loralei.”

Stacy replied “Like hell I will, you f*cking bastard! What the hell are you doing with your tongue down her throat, you’re my husband, you a*shole!”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll leave you two alone,” I said on my way out the door. Jaxon didn’t try to stop me, and I was actually glad he didn’t. I was too upset to talk to him. I really didn’t want him to see how much this was affecting me. How much he was able to hurt me.

When I got home, I called mom.

“Would you be able to keep the kids an extra day? I think I’m gonna go to Joplin today, instead of tomorrow.”

“Everything okay, honey? You don’t sound so good.” Mom asked.

“I’m okay. I’m not, but I just don’t want to talk about it right now, okay?”

“Is Jaxon still going with you?” She asked, knowing he wasn’t.

“Something happened. Long story – I’ll explain it later. I promise.”

I got the kids stuff packed for their long weekend with their grandparents and started my three hour drive to Joplin.

I finally turned my phone off about half way to Joplin. Jaxon wouldn’t stop calling. I had nothing to say to him. I couldn’t believe he lied to me. How could he be with me if he was married and why didn’t Jake tell me he was married. I really didn’t understand what was going on, but I couldn’t think about it right now.

I turned my phone back on long enough to call Emma. I needed to talk to someone about what had happened.

“Hey, Lor, what’s going on?” She answered with her normal, perky voice.

I was sobbing. I could hardly respond. “He’s, he’s married, Ems.”

“Who’s married, Lor?” She asked.

“Jaxon. Jaxon’s married. His wife showed up today. He has a wife.” I was still crying and trying to focus on the road.

“That f*cking bastard. I’ll castrate him for you.” Ems was always supportive. “Why the hell didn’t he tell you he was married?”

“I don’t know. When she showed up, he acted like I wasn’t even there. When she saw us together, kissing, he looked like a kid who got caught with his hand in a candy jar. He looked like he was doing something wrong.”

“I’m flabbergasted, Lor. I don’t, I just don’t even know what to say. I’m here for you always. Whatever you need, you just let me know. Don’t you dare cry over that bastard. He doesn’t deserve you.”

“Oh, Ems. What about the kids? They love him. This is going to break their hearts. This is why I didn’t want to be in a relationship. Don’t you see? This is what I have always been afraid of. I can’t stand the thought of my babies hurting over this, over my bad decisions.”

“You listen to me, Loralei Harper. This was not your bad decision. He seemed like the real deal. You didn’t do anything wrong. He’s a liar, not you. Now, you’re scaring me. I don’t think you’re safe to be driving. Just pull over and let me come get you,” she pleaded.

“I’m okay, Ems. The tears are drying up. I’m fine to drive. I’m going to be there in a couple of hours. I’ll call you when I get checked in.”

“You better. Don’t make me drive my ass to Joplin to check on you.”

“I promise. I love you, Ems. Thanks for listening.”

“I love you too, Lor. You drive safe and take care of you, for me.”

“Will do.”

I hung up the phone and turned it off again. I didn’t want to talk to Jaxon anymore today. Nothing he could say would make this better. The look on his face when Stacy walked in was engraved in my brain. I would never forget how guilty he looked.

When I arrived at the hotel, I was drained physically and emotionally. I checked in and gave my bags to the bellboy as I headed upstairs to my room. I loved this trip every year mostly because of this beautiful hotel and the amazing suite that I splurged on. The suite was huge and very traditional. There was a huge four-poster bed in the middle of the room. The bathroom was gigantic and so relaxing. There was a large claw-foot tub in the corner that was the perfect size for two. I had fantasized about Jaxon and me taking a bath together in that tub.

Jaxon. Why did he lie to me? Why didn’t he tell me what was going on? Why would he hurt me like this? I just couldn’t understand.

When I turned my phone back on, I saw that I had more missed calls and several voicemails, all from him. The more I looked at the phone the madder I got. Screw him - this was not my fault. I opened my heart, body, and soul to him, and he neglected to mention he was married. How could he do that? What kind of a person was he?

I decided to go down to the hotel bar and get a drink. I was here to relax and have fun and that’s exactly what I planned to do.

Before I left the room, I called mom and checked on the kids and told them goodnight. I reassured mom that I was fine and headed downstairs to the bar. I decided I should try to eat something before I started drinking so I asked to be seated in the restaurant. There was a gentleman standing by the hostess station. I assumed he was waiting for a table also.

He was tall, like abnormally tall, I would guess him to be 6’ 7”. He looked to be about my age, he had light blonde hair and really intense green eyes. He was also a cowboy from his hat to his boots and the wranglers in between. His body was very muscular and you could tell by looking at his calloused hands that he worked hard, definitely not afraid to get his hands dirty.

He shocked me when he walked over and said, “Evenin’ ma’am, dinin’ alone tonight?” I didn’t think he could get any sexier, but I was wrong. His slow, southern drawl was hot.

I answered with, “I’ve kinda had a shitty day actually, and I wouldn’t be good company for anyone tonight. I just came down to grab a drink, well actually probably a few drinks, and I thought I better eat something first.”

“Well we can’t have that now, can we?” He motioned for the hostess. “Excuse me ma’am, we’ll need a table for two.”

“My name is Cade Walker, nice to meet you Miss….?”

“Oh, my name is Loralei Harper. Nice to meet you too, Mr. Walker.”

He looked at me funny. “Please call me Cade and I’ll call you Loralei, okay?”

I nodded in agreement and the hostess came over to escort us to our table.

We sat down. Cade asked what I would like to drink. I told him to surprise me. He headed off for the bar, and the waitress brought me our menus. She explained that she could have taken our drink orders. I wasn’t really paying attention to anything that was going on, so I just nodded and waited for Cade to get back with my drink.

Cade brought me a bottle of Corona with a lime in it. I was not a big fan of beer, but I started chugging it anyway.

“I think you might ought to slow down, hon’”

I sneered at him, “I warned you I had a really crappy day, but I forgot to mention that I plan on getting really drunk tonight, so if you don’t want to be a part of that you better get your ass out of that chair and go find some other woman to hit on.”

He looked completely stunned, but he just gave me his best shit-eating grin. “So what makes ya think I’m gonna hit on you?”

In my snarkiest voice I said, “You aren’t planning on it, really?”

He couldn’t even argue. He just laughed this deep belly laugh as the waitress came over to take our order. “Just bring us a couple of steaks, medium rare, baked potatoes, and do you have dinner rolls?” The waitress nodded, took our order, and headed off to the kitchen.

“You realize this is 2013 and not 1950, don’t you? I am perfectly capable of placing my own dinner order!” This man was so arrogant.

He just shrugged his shoulders. “Well yeah hon’ I do, but you didn’t seem to mind it, you know, I bet there are lots of things I could do for you that you wouldn’t mind.”

When he said that, I choked on my beer. He was looking at me like he could eat me alive, and I didn't know if it was the fact that I was pissed at Jaxon or that Cade was just so damned gorgeous, but my lady parts were doing a little happy dance.

We ate our dinner and I had a few, well more like seven, beers. I was feeling no pain. Screw Jaxon, actually no, been there done that, won’t do it again. Before I knew what was happening, I was trying to get my keycard to unlock my hotel room door, and Cade had his tongue in my ear.

----------

What was that noise…seriously, why did I feel like my head was going to pop off and that that wouldn’t be the worst thing to happen? I very carefully turned over and then I really wished my head would just pop off. Cade was in my bed and he was buck naked, except for his socks. And what I couldn’t decide was if I was more upset that he was in my bed, or that he hadn’t taken his socks off before we had sex. I felt like a total slut at that moment. I very carefully crawled out of bed and headed toward the bathroom.

When I looked in the mirror I scared myself. I looked like a hooker. Well, what I assumed a hooker would look like after a really rough night. I had raccoon eyes from my mascara, my hair looked like rats could be living in it, and I was wearing - what was I wearing - apparently I got cold in the night because I had on Cades undershirt.

I decided that I really needed to take a shower and try to remember more about what happened last night. Everything started flooding my mind...the intense flirting during dinner, his foot sliding up my inner thigh under the table, and then me asking him to come to my room for sex. Oh my god, I asked him to come to my room and I told him I just wanted to forget about everything and have meaningless sex and he agreed and came to my room with me. I can’t even blame him for what happened. I did this. It was all my fault.

Why was I so sore? I literally hurt all over and the warm water in the shower was only helping a little, I needed to remember more about what happened after we got back to the room last night.

I remembered trying to get into the room and Cade sucking on my earlobe and then sticking his tongue in my ear. Then he used that tantalizing tongue to lick a line from my ear to my nipple, where he sucked and pinched until I screamed out in pain or ecstasy, or both. That thought sent a shiver down my spine.

Then somehow I was naked and he was naked. I remembered seeing a tattoo on his chest and thinking I had to trace it with my tongue, and then I did just that.

All of these memories were coming back to me - me insisting he wear a condom and then Cade entering me as he bent me over the couch. I remembered how big he was and how it felt to be so amazingly full, he was bucking and riding me like an animal. That must be why I was so sore today.

More memories appeared of me in bed with Cade lying on top of me, him screaming how tight I was and how amazing it felt to be inside me. Oh my god, I am so glad I was drunk at the time, or I probably would have died of embarrassment. This memory couldn’t be right, surely not. There was no way a man would howl when he came, but, oh my god, I remember him doing just that.

I decided that I better learn to enjoy the heat because I was definitely going to go to hell for being a slut. I hadn’t had sex in ten years and now I was just screwing random cowboys that I met in hotel bars. I asked myself, “How did it come to this?” But I already knew the answer. I fell in love with a pierced, tattooed, knight in shining armor who just happened to forget to mention he was married.



Cade



Damn, I hated coming to this thing. Since I was in charge of my family’s ranch, I had to attend this event every year. Normally, I would find a warm body to keep me company for the weekend. Then I would make some deals as I wined and dined a few prospective sellers.

I really needed a beer and to find that warm body for the weekend. The best place to do that was at the restaurant downstairs. There would be some little cattle heiress just waiting for a big strong cowboy like me to sweep her off her feet, or in my case f*ck her senseless.

While I was standin’ at the hostess station I saw her. She looked like an angel. All she was missin’ was a damn halo. She had long blonde hair laying in curls down her back. She was wearing blue jeans, cowboy boots, and a red plaid button-up shirt. That shirt had just enough buttons unbuttoned to make me want to take a closer look.

I walked over to her. “Evenin’ ma’am, dining alone tonight?”

She looked like her cat had just died. She said, “I’ve kinda had a shitty day, I wouldn’t be good company for anyone tonight. I just came down to grab a drink, well actually probably a few drinks, and I thought I better eat something first.”

“Well we can’t have that now, can we?” I motioned for the hostess. I let her know I would be needin’ a table for two.

I decided I should probably introduce myself. “My name is Cade Walker, nice to meet you Miss….?”

“Oh, my name is Loralei Harper. Nice to meet you too Mr. Walker.”

What the hell? Nobody calls me Mr. Walker. “Please call me Cade and I’ll call you Loralei, okay?”

The hostess took us over to our table.

I asked Loralei what she would like to drink. She told me to surprise her. Corona with lime it is. I could tell she wasn’t really excited about my drink choice, but she started to chug it down anyway.

“I think you might ought to slow down, hon’”

She shot me a look, that I’m pretty sure would’ve killed a weaker man, “I warned you I had a really shitty day, but I forgot to mention that I plan on getting really drunk tonight, so if you don’t want to be a part of that you better get your ass out of that chair and go find some other woman to hit on.”

Oh, I was gonna enjoy this. I couldn’t help but grin. “So what makes ya think I’m gonna hit on you?”

She said, “You aren’t planning on it, really?”

I couldn’t disagree with that. Of course I was plannin’ on it. Why the hell else would I have bought her a drink and offered her my company for the evening? I just laughed at her.

The waitress came over and I ordered our dinner. This did not make Loralei very happy. And by the look on her face, I knew I was fixin’ to hear about it.

“You realize this is 2013 and not 1950, don’t you? I am perfectly capable of placing my own dinner order!”

Yep, I was gettin’ a hell of a kick out of this woman. “Well yeah hon’ I do, but you didn’t seem to mind it, you know, I bet there are lots of things I could do for you that you wouldn’t mind.” Damn, the things I could do to this woman.

I guess I was kinda looking at her like she was my next meal. She was blushing, and in my vast experience, that was always the sign of a good girl wantin’ to be bad.

Wow, Loralei Harper could drink. While we ate our dinner she chugged seven or eight beers. She was pretty buzzed. Actually, I was too. I was matching her drink for drink.

“So, you run Harper Farms, huh?” I asked in between bites of steak.

“Yep, sure do. I’ve been managing it for several years. It’s so much more than just a business, you know? It’s my future. It’s my family's future. It’s what I have to show the world I was here. And I accomplished something while I was in this world.”

It was like she was inside my head. That was exactly how I felt about my ranch. It was my life. And I would do anything to make it a success. Damn, she had the most beautiful honey colored eyes. I couldn’t wait to see the look in those eyes when I made her come. If I had anything to do with it, that would be happenin’ real soon. I ran my boot up her leg starting at her ankle and ending at her inner thigh. She was looking right into my eyes the entire time.

“So, Cade Walker, you wanna have sex with me?” She asked. I almost choked on my beer.

“Excuse me?”

“Cut the shit. We both know that’s what you’ve been planning all night. I’m just making it easier for you. But let me make this clear - this means nothing. It’s just two people having sex. And I have a rule. If you follow the rule, I will do anything to you that you want.”

“Anything?” I asked.

“Yep, anything your little heart desires.”

It definitely wouldn’t be my heart that she would be servicing soon. I wouldn’t have any problem coming up with something for her to do to me.

“What’s this rule I have to abide by?” I asked.

“You have to wear a condom. You can’t be like asshat and try to get me pregnant, kay? That’s not too much to ask, right?”

“Not at all, hon. I promise I’ll wear a condom.”

“Then we’re on cowboy. Let’s get upstairs.”

“Your room or mine?” I asked.

“Mine.”

I took care of the check and we started walking to the elevator. When the doors closed after we stepped on, she jumped me. No joke. This woman was f*ckin’ amazing. She had me pushed up against the wall, her tongue was in my ear, and her legs were wrapped around my waist.

I peeled her off of me as the elevator doors opened. We walked to her room. She had a hard time getting the door open, but finally she did.

I couldn’t wait another second. I needed to be inside her. I grabbed her shirt and ripped it off of her. I threw it to the ground and she smiled the sexiest little smile at me. She started to take her jeans off, so I decided to help her. I pulled them down and had her step out of them. I threw them somewhere in the room too. I was in a hurry. I wasn’t too worried about her clothes.

She was standing in front of me in a lacey black bra and panties. I stripped down to nothing but my socks. I didn’t have time to take them off. Priorities.

I couldn’t wait another second. I grabbed her and kissed her hard. I thrust my tongue into her mouth. I didn’t want this to end. There was something about this woman. I couldn’t say for sure what it was. But it just felt right.

I started licking a line from her throat to her nipple. When I bit down she hollered. I straightened up and looked into her eyes. Those beautiful, f*cking eyes. She saw my tattoo on my chest and leaned in and licked a trail all the way around it. I couldn’t take another second of this. I had to be inside her, now.

I motioned for her to follow me over to the couch. I turned her until her stomach was pressing against the arm of the couch. I covered her body with mine. Grabbing her panties, I ripped them off of her and threw them across the room. I unhooked her bra and started to massage her breasts, paying special attention to her nipples. They were so hard.

She wanted me just as much as I wanted her. I could feel it. My hand found its way to her p-ssy. She was so wet and ready for me.

I started to press into her from behind, when she said, “Condom. You promised.” She was breathing heavy and rubbing her backside up against me. I was about to explode and I wasn’t even inside her yet. I left her just long enough to grab my wallet and get a condom. I got back over to her and entered her in one hard thrust. She screamed out, “Oh my God, Cade.”

After the couch, I took that woman in every position I had ever tried or imagined. She was f*ckin’ amazin’. She made me howl more than any other woman ever had. When she finally had enough and fell asleep, I laid awake just watching her breathe. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. There was somethin’ about her. I ran my hand along her jaw and she twisted to press her cheek into my palm.

This woman was gonna be trouble. I could already feel it in my...heart. Seriously? What the f*ck was happenin’ to me? I don’t have feelings for women. I f*ck women. That’s it. No sappy love stories here. What the hell was makin’ me want to know more about her?



Jaxon



“What the hell are you doing here?” I asked Stacy.

“I should ask you the same thing. I’ve missed you so much, baby. Why are you here? Why did you leave Richmond?” Stacy sashayed over to me and wrapped her arms around my neck. I pushed her away.

“Are you still using?” I asked.

“No, baby, I quit that shit a long time ago. I’ve been looking everywhere for you and finally your mom told me where you were.”

She looked sincere, but with Stacy you could never tell. Her pupils looked normal and she didn’t look like she was using. She had actually put on a little weight. She was still really small, but she had some meat on her bones.

“Where have you been, Stacy? I looked everywhere for you. It was like you f*cking vanished.”

“I was in rehab, baby. Trying to fix me, so I could come fix us. I love you, Jaxon. I have loved you since I was a kid and I always will.”

Before I knew what was happening, she was kissing me and touching me and trying to push her tongue into my mouth.

I pushed her away, using a little more force than I meant to, and she fell to the couch. “I can’t do this with you Stacy. When you left I filed for divorce. All I need you to do is sign the papers. As far as I’m concerned, we have been divorced for almost two years.”

She burst into tears. “Is this because of that country bumpkin you were banging on the desk when I walked in here?”

I couldn’t even look at the woman sitting in front of me. This was not the same woman that I had loved. I had to keep telling myself that. She was not the love of my life. She was just my ex-wife.

“I love her, Stacy. I really love her. She’s my future, and I need you to remain in my past. I need you to sign the papers and move on with your life. Can you do that for me?”

Stacy was still crying. “I have something to show you that might change your mind. You need to come out to the car with me?”

I agreed and followed her out to her car. I noticed as we got closer that there was a woman sitting in the front seat holding something in her lap. When we reached her car I realized the woman was Stacy’s sister Megan and the “something” she was holding was a little girl.

She looked to be about a year old – maybe, I don’t know, I couldn’t really tell. When I looked over at Stacy she was smiling from ear to ear, “I would like to introduce you to your daughter. Her name is Jazmine, but I call her Jaz.”

I couldn’t move, I couldn’t speak, all I could do was stare at the beautiful little girl sitting in front of me. She looked just like Stacy. But how could she be mine? Could she be mine?

“Stacy, she’s mine? Are you sure?” I asked.

“Of course I’m sure, Jaxon. I always used a condom with everyone but you. She has to be yours.”

“That’s bullshit, Stacy. You were so high most of the time, you have no f*cking idea if you used a condom or not.”

She looks just like you Jaxon. I know she’s yours. I have no doubt that she is ours. We made her with our love. How can you deny that?” Stacy pleaded with me.

“I’m sorry Stacy, but I can’t take your word on this. I need a DNA test. If she’s mine, I want to be a part of her life, but we are through. I don’t love you, and I don’t want to be married to you.” I didn’t mean to sound so harsh, but I needed to make her understand. I couldn’t stay married to her even if Jaz was mine.

Jaz was so beautiful, little, and sweet. I would love for her to be mine. I know that would complicate my relationship with Lor, but had always wanted to be a daddy, and Stacy and I tried for so long and it didn’t happen. I was so afraid I couldn’t have kids of my own. I needed this test, I needed to know, and I needed to know as soon as possible.

I couldn’t hold Jaz yet. I didn’t want to have any attachment to her until I knew for sure. “I can call the clinic in town and see when we can schedule a DNA test,” I said.

“It’s not f*cking necessary, Jaxon. She’s yours. I know that with all my heart.” Stacy said as she stepped closer to me and tried to put her arms around my neck.

I pushed her back and said, “I want the damn test, Stacy. I’ll call and get it scheduled.”

Stacy nodded and I went back inside and made the call. The clinic said they could see us first thing in the morning and we would have the results in a couple of weeks.

Stacy informed me they were staying in town and she would meet me at the clinic in the morning.

I had to try to fix what I f*cked up with Loralei. I didn’t handle any of this well. I should’ve ran after her, but I didn’t. I didn’t do a damn thing to stop her from leaving.

I drove to her house and she wasn’t home. Since she wasn’t there I went to her parents’ house.

“Mrs. Harper, is Loralei here,” I said sheepishly when she answered the door.

“No, Jaxon. She isn’t here,” She answered with a “go to hell” look on her face.

“Do you know where she is?” I asked. I was having a hard time making eye contact with her. I knew that she knew what had happened earlier.

“She doesn’t want to see you right now, son. You need to give her some time. To be perfectly honest with ya, I’m not real happy with ya either.”

How could she be? I had just hurt her daughter. I hadn’t meant to, but I was shocked when I saw Stacy. I didn’t know what the hell to do.

“Mrs. Harper, it was never my intention to hurt Loralei. I love that woman, so damn much. I need to fix this. Please tell me where she is.” I was almost begging.

“I think you need to go home and sleep on it. Think about what’s happened and how you intend to fix it. Give Lor some time to think about things too,” She said.

I couldn’t argue with her. I was sure Lor needed some time to think. I couldn’t stand the thought of not seeing her until tomorrow, but it was better this way.

“Did she go on to Joplin?” I asked sheepishly.

“She did, Jaxon. But I’m asking you to give her until tomorrow. I think you both need to calm down before you do something you wish you hadn’t.”

I agreed to not go to her until tomorrow, but that didn’t keep me from calling her. I knew she wouldn’t answer, but I called anyway. I didn’t sleep a wink and didn’t even change my clothes. Nothing mattered until I could speak with Loralei tomorrow…just a few hours and I could try to fix this.