A Life More Complete

---Chapter 21---

Tyler arrives home just in time to leave for Bob’s house warming party on Friday night. I spent the better part of the afternoon making homemade cupcakes and frosting, something I find oddly soothing. I’m putting the cupcakes in the car as Tyler hauls into the driveway. He pulls his bag from the car and walks past me without saying a word. We haven’t spoken since the argument about Trini. I can’t even begin to think about all the other bullshit he claims I’ve done. This time he can apologize to me, but even I know that is like waiting for hell to freeze over. I’m done being the one in this relationship who gives in. I meet him as he climbs out of the shower. His face wears a stoic expression, but the effort he gives to ignore me is extreme.

“I’m leaving in ten minutes. You can join me if you like, but you don’t have to,” I say walking away without giving him a second look.

I’m putting my shoes on as he comes into the bedroom wearing just a towel pulled tightly around his waist. His hair is longer and beginning to curl. The few weeks he has been living with me his tan has become permanent, his hair blonder and his body more defined. He’s extremely hard to ignore. When he finally speaks to me his voice is hoarse and I know he’s been smoking pot again. I shake my head at his teenage behavior and I start to wonder if he will ever outgrow this mentality. My conscience screams “no” and as I piece together all his well-defined behaviors, I know the answer is no. Although Tyler is able to keep a successful business running and create the illusion of being an independent and self-sufficient adult, he still lives half the life of a nineteen year old college student.

“You ready?” he asks.

“Yep. I’m glad you decided to join me. I missed you.” I truly did miss him and I didn’t really want to spend my night without him.

We climb in the car while I repeat in my head Tyler’s words about not having to fill the silence. The ride begins to wear on me as it takes over an hour to go twenty miles and I hear Tyler mumble under his breath as I sigh and begin strumming my fingers on the steering wheel. Traffic can make you insane.

“What did you say?” I snap.

“Nothing,” he snaps back.

“Yes you did. I heard you. Stop acting like a petulant child. You’re not a teenager anymore and I am not your mother, so stop mumbling under your breath and tell me what you said.” My voice is loud in the small car and his blue eyes widen at my words.

“I said that traffic sucks and that I should’ve just stayed home. Happy now?”

“No, not really. I’m tired of this,” I say and I don’t mean the traffic.

“Tired of what?” he asks and he honestly sounds like he doesn’t have a clue.

“Tired of all this bullshit. The constant feeling that you’re mad at me.”

“Those are your hang-ups, Kristin, not mine,” he says looking out the window.

I detest it when he calls me Kristin, adding to my building fury. “Fine, whatever.” I can’t even begin this argument with him, so we sit in silence.

I pull up next to the curb at Bob’s house and climb out. Pulling the boxed cupcakes from the trunk I turn and glance at the house. There’s nothing exceptional about it. It’s the same tiny ranch style as every other house in the neighborhood, except Bob’s house has been expertly landscaped by Ben. I’d know his work anywhere.

Tyler snaps me from my thoughts with his callous tone, “What are you doing?” His face is sour and his brow furrowed as he stares at me holding three large boxes of cupcakes stacked on top of each other in my arms. He doesn’t make an attempt to assist me when he sees me struggling to close the trunk.

“Nothing,” I tell him as he follows me up to the front door. “Can you at least try to be civil? Please?” I look at him and smile sweetly. He returns it with a small closed mouth smile.

I find Bob in the kitchen and he helps with the cupcakes, setting them down on the already over-crowded kitchen table. He gushes about the cupcakes knowing I made them just for him. They’re his favorite and since he moved away I don’t bake as much as I used to. I introduce him to Tyler and they shake hands, but they say little to each other. Bob tells Tyler that the drinks are out back and Tyler excuses himself to get a drink.

“Krissy, do you want anything?” he asks as he walks away.

“Sure. I’ll have a beer. Whatever’s in the cooler is fine.”

Bob looks at me apologetically when Tyler is out of the picture. He takes my hand and asks me if I realize who did the landscaping.

“Of course I know. Why?”

“You’re not mad are you? He does such amazing work. I couldn’t pass up the chance to have him work on the house. It turned out beautiful.” Bob is rambling not even allowing me a chance to answer. “You should see the pool out back. I feel like I live at a spa.”

“Bob, I’m not mad. It’s no big deal. I can’t believe he came all the way out here though. It’s pretty far from his usual radius.”

“It is, but when I asked him he said that he always helps out friends. He gave us an awesome deal. It was almost too much to even accept.”

“I’m not surprised. He’s a very generous person.” Bob is still eyeing me suspiciously and I know he has more to tell.

“What is it? There’s more. I can tell.” I lovingly pat his cheek. “I know that face.”

“He’s here.”

The smile drops from my face, but I try to play it off like I don’t care. I haven’t seen Ben since that day in his office. We’d texted a couple of times, but mostly those were just questions about current projects he was working on and I also filled him in about Rachel’s wedding.

“He brought a date, so I told him about Tyler. I tried to help. I knew you wouldn’t want to do it.” Bob was right. I planned to carry on as if Ben had never existed and the thought of explaining myself to him was worse than anything. “Don’t worry, his date has nothing on you.” This comment makes me smile inwardly and I secretly want to shout “yes”. “She’s not his type at all. Her name is Jessica and she’s wearing far too much makeup and five inch heels. Who wears five inch heels to a house warming party?”

“Melinda,” I say jokingly.

“You know what I mean. She’s just dreadful. Maybe for Ben? I don’t know. I’m partial to you, so it’s hard. You guys were just so, I don’t know, natural together.” Bob stops short of continuing as Tyler approaches.

He comes up behind me and hands me a Bud Light. I wince. I hate Bud Light. Bob looks at me and knows my exact thought. Bob offers me Rolling Rock from the fridge, but I decline. I hate that Tyler doesn’t remember what I like and dislike. Tyler’s oblivious, sometimes intentionally oblivious, either that or he’s far too self absorbed to notice.

“No, it’s okay,” I say opening the beer and taking a long drink that causes me to feel like I might gag. Bob moves away quietly to greet some guests that have just arrived. I don’t want to start with Tyler at Bob’s house so I drink it down quickly.

“I didn’t know you didn’t like Bud Light,” he says as he leans in close to my ear and chills run down my spine. “You should have said something. You told me to get anything. Your friend made me look like an a*shole.”

I want to tell him that he makes himself look like an a*shole, but I restrain myself. I have told Tyler repeatedly that I don’t drink Bud Light, but he’s never bothered to listen.

“He wasn’t trying to make you look like an a*shole. He just knows me really well. Bob and Melinda are my family out here. We spend a lot of time together and we know a lot about each other.” I hope that my words diffuse our already shitty situation. He seems to ignore me as he watches a leggy blonde in a bikini make her way toward the pool out the sliding glass door. “Now you’re making yourself look like an a*shole,” I mutter, leaving him standing in the kitchen. Tyler heads in the direction of the catering table and mumbles to me about getting something to eat.

Seconds later I run into Jon and he greets me warmly with a kiss and a hug. He asks where my beautiful fiancé is and I tell him he’s acting like a dick. Before I can elaborate someone calls him back into the house.

I give in and meet Tyler at the buffet table on the patio. “Are you hungry?” he asks handing me a plate. We fill our plates and take a seat at a table filled with people I don’t know. We talk with the people around us about the basics and the table begins to clear out. Tyler and I are left alone and I decide now would be a good time to mention Ben, since I haven’t seen him yet.

“So, Ty? My ex is here. I just thought I’d let you know. There’s no weirdness between us or anything, but I thought I should tell you.” I take a deep breath and realize then that I’d stopped breathing.

“Why’s he here?” His face shows confusion, since Tyler knows the story of how I met Ben.

“He put in the pool,” I sputter out and it sounds ridiculous as the words leave my mouth. I know full well that Ben’s job is not installing pools, but in my nervous explanation that’s how it comes out.

“Your ex installs pools for a living?” he asks sounding disgusted and appalled.

“Not exactly. He owns the company and he does a little of everything. Landscaping, lawn care, pool cleaning and installation, but mostly he’s the landscape architect. His father started the company and he took over.”

“Oh,” he says going back to the fajita left of his plate. The look on his face says he’s beyond this conversation. Tyler finishes the rest of his food and excuses himself to the bathroom.

I make my way to the pitcher of sangria on the table and pour myself a glass. Downing it in under a minute I pour another and drink it down like a fish. I decide that restraint is not my middle name and neither is self-control, so I pour a third glass and wander over to the pool.

“Do you like it?” I hear from behind and I don’t even have to turn around. He stands next to me and smiles brightly.

“Of course I do, Ben. You are a true talent.” I step closer to him closing the small distance between us and hug him. His body, his smell, just being near him makes my body tingle. It races from my stomach through to my fingers and chills run over me. His arms wrap around my small frame and the pressure from his body is calming.

“Engaged already, huh? You didn’t waste a second,” he says making the situation slightly awkward, but I try to ignore it. “Are you here with Tyler?”

“Yeah, he’s here. I heard you came with a date, too.” I try to sound indifferent, but it’s hard. I have no right to feel slighted or upset, but part of me does.

“Gotta pass the time somehow, right? Jessica, her name’s Jessica. She’s playing bags with some of Jon’s friends. I’ll introduce you to her later.”

We talk and the conversation comes easily. I ask how Roxy is doing because I miss her as much as I miss Ben. He also fills me in on his job and all his employees. We talk about his recent trip down to Baja to surf, something we’re both interested in, and so the conversation flows. He asks about Trini and I give him the condensed version and he admits he’s been following it, but only because it concerns me, and as he says it, I blush. I realize we’ve been talking for at least thirty minutes and there’s been no sign of Tyler.

“It’s been great catching up with you. I’m glad we still have the kind of relationship where we can be friends.” I say, smiling and he hugs me a little tighter.

“I told you once a long time ago that you didn’t have to be my girlfriend to be in my life. I enjoy being around you and I’ll take what I can get.” He pulls away and smiles weakly.

“Thank you,” I whisper as I can feel the tears forming. I know he’s still hurt, but there is no way he would ever let on.

Tyler strolls up seconds later with two beers in his hand. Giving me a Bud Light again, he smirks at me with a pissed off look on his face. “So you gonna introduce me?”

I breathe in deeply, “Tyler this is Ben Torres and Ben, this is my fiancé, Tyler McCarthy.” I emphasize the word fiancé hoping it will subdue Tyler’s ill-mannered behavior. I should know better by now. He’s about to bait Ben into fighting with him. The thing that Tyler doesn’t know is that Ben won’t buy into it. He just won’t. It’s not in him to fight, especially publicly.

“So I hear you’re a day laborer or is it a migrant worker?” Tyler says with that smirk still on his face.

“Tyler! What is wrong with you?” My eyes widen and I can’t seem to make him budge as I push him with both hands.

“Krissy, it’s okay,” Ben say completely composed. “I think you’re misinformed...” Before Ben can finish his thought Tyler jumps in again.

“My apologies, I just assumed you are since you’re Mexican. Don’t they all work in the trade?” The appalled look on my face is only getting bigger. I can’t believe this is happening.

“Tyler! Please stop.” I look over at Ben who doesn’t seem to be phased by this debacle. “Look Ben. I’m sorry, but we obviously need to be leaving. I’ll see you around.” Ben gives me a slight nod to acknowledge my apology. I shove Tyler again and this time he moves, but he begins laughing as he grabs my wrist and tugs me toward the car. I will not have this argument with Tyler in front of Bob’s house.

I climb into the driver’s side of the car and start the engine, while Tyler seats himself with a thump in the passenger seat. Before backing out I text Bob and apologize for leaving without a good-bye. Melinda hasn’t even arrived, so I leave that one to a later conversation. I put the car in reverse and floor the pedal. Being this close to Tyler is nearly impossible right now. He opens his mouth to speak and before even a syllable is uttered I lay into him.

“I swear to God Tyler if you open your f*cking mouth it will not be pretty. Don’t even test me. Right now I’m so angry with you I can’t even...” My words fail me at that moment while we are flying down the 405 at an obscene rate of speed. I have turned into an extra from Fast and the Furious as I pass cars, cutting them off and weaving. I need out of this car. I can feel my anger building inside and a new and recent development are the tears that seem, to come when anger hits me. (If I’m being honest I seem to be crying at nearly everything lately.) They pool in my eyes and fall silently down my cheeks. The humiliation and the frustration are taking its toll on me when a stifled sob escapes my lips.

My little car jumps the curb with great force when I pull into the driveway. I storm out of the car, up the stairs and into the house. Slamming the door behind me, but it flies open as Tyler smacks it with his palm. It hits the wall behind it and placing a small circular knob shaped hole where it bounces off.

“How dare you!” I scream.

“How dare you!” he screams back. “I had to watch you press your tits up against some other guy’s body, laugh at his jokes. Do you have any idea what you looked like?”

“Grow up, Tyler. Grow the f*ck up! I know exactly what it looked like. It looked like someone talking to a friend. It’s you who sees it for what it’s not.” I run my fingers through my hair completely exasperated by this. I can’t take it any longer. “We’re done. I need you out.” My tone is suddenly controlled. I pull the ring from my finger setting it down as I walk past him into my bedroom. I climb into the shower and cry.