“Fine. Then have her come down tomorrow,” Blaise said in a strained voice. “Simon can come back to you the day after. I’m sure you’re anxious to have him at school.” He had told her that the students were returning Sunday. A few had dropped out or made other arrangements, like Salima, but most were coming back to Caldwell. He was very sorry that Salima was not returning after so many years, but he understood. And it was good for her to be at home.
“I’m glad it worked out so well with Simon. I was sure it would, once everyone adjusted. I think Rebecca will work out well for you too.” They discussed the financial arrangements. She was going to work directly for Blaise, since Salima was not returning to Caldwell. She was giving up the cottage on the grounds too. Eric had found Rebecca for Blaise as a favor, so as not to leave her in the lurch when Simon left. He knew how busy Blaise was, and that she needed someone with Salima at all times, particularly when she traveled. She had told him she was going to Lebanon the following week and Morocco in a month. But there was no way she could go to Lebanon now and leave Salima with a new person.
Eric agreed to have Becky at the apartment at noon the next day. She would come to the city by bus in the morning and take a cab to the apartment. As soon as Blaise hung up, Simon called her. It was the only way to reach her. She was holed up in her room with the door locked. She had been crying before Eric called her, and didn’t want Simon to see her. The situation was miserable enough without his feeling sorry for her on top of it. She didn’t want to look pathetic to him, and hadn’t felt this vulnerable in years. Not since Andrew. And the irony was that she had finally trusted someone and opened up, and now he was leaving too, for another woman. It wasn’t quite as simple as that, but it felt that way to her.
“You talked to Eric?” Simon asked her when she answered her cell phone. He hadn’t even been sure she would do that, since she hadn’t answered his texts. “I know Becky, and she’s pretty good. I think she and Salima should get along. Don’t let Becky baby her, though. I’d hate to see Salima lose all the ground she’s gained.” But he doubted that would happen now. Salima had become her own person in a mere three months.
“You could stay and do the job yourself,” Blaise said sadly. In her heart of hearts, she was hoping he would change his mind and stay, she wished he could, but she knew it was out of the question. He had a contract to fulfill, and he was a responsible person. And he had a woman he felt he had to go back to, in fairness to all three of them. That was the part Blaise hated. She could sense that she’d already lost him, and knew how it would turn out. She honestly believed Megan was the woman he should be with, and that she wasn’t. His relationship with Blaise had been a long shot, given their age difference, and she had lost. She had taken her chips off the table, and gone home. Now all she wanted was for him to leave as soon as possible, and end the torture of their situation as quickly as they could. She didn’t want him to linger. It was too painful knowing he was right there, and no longer hers. He was already Megan’s, and now she realized he always had been. She had won him back by leaving her husband.
“I wish I could stay,” Simon said, and meant it. But he had to go back and face reality on all fronts, at work, and with Megan. “I’m sorry, Blaise,” he said, wanting to hold her in his arms again and sleep with her before he left, and make love together. But he was too respectful to do so. He knew how much he was hurting her, and he loved her too much to make it worse. He wished he could have them both. It was an age-old dilemma, and she’d been there before.
“I’m sorry too,” she said, as tears filled her eyes, and he could hear it in her voice. “That’s life, I guess. Things don’t always work out. It’ll be better for you this way.” She had already given him up in her mind. And he knew she was thinking about children for him again. “And your mom will be happy. She won’t have to worry about how old I am.”
“That never mattered to me, your age, or my mom.” She knew that was true. But Megan still had a hold on him that he hadn’t freed himself of yet, and maybe never would. He had no idea now which woman was right for him, Meg or Blaise. And Blaise had taken herself out of the running, out of pride and self-preservation, if nothing else.
“When are you leaving?” she asked in a choked voice.
“Tomorrow.” He had just finished packing when he called her. “Tomorrow night, if Becky seems okay to you.”
“I don’t have any other choice. Eric says he doesn’t know anyone else.”