Epilogue
Two years later…
It’s Valentine’s Day so Jacky and Remy decided to use the day filled with love for something useful other than sex and chocolate. They got married. There’ll be sex and chocolate later though. I helped plan the honeymoon with Remy so Jacky can be surprised.
I’m leaning on the kitchen island in my dad’s house staring at the wedding invitation and I can’t stop smiling. And crying. I can’t help it, I’m emotional. And it doesn’t help when Kelsey walks in here with Micha on her arm smiling at each other like they’ll never meet again. They look so happy and I love it.
“Please tell me you didn’t finish the cake,” Matty sighed, walking up to me. “Dad got the last piece and he doesn’t want to share. His girlfriend wants it.”
I held up my paper plate with a half eaten slice of cake. “Depends,” I said. “Is it for you or Katrina?”
Matty grabbed my plate with a smirk.
I didn’t let it go.
“It’s for me,” he whined.
Mhm. That’s what I thought. When I made this cake for Jacky’s wedding, Matty complained the whole time saying it’ll taste like shit and it looks like shit so he’s not going to eat it. He had more than the other guests did. He just doesn’t know I have another cake hiding at Logan’s place waiting for me to devour it.
“Here,” I said letting him have it. “I don’t want you to starve.”
“You’re the best. Love you, Becky,” he said stabbing the fork into the soft chocolate cake. I almost attacked him when he put it into his mouth but I controlled myself. I will eat that cake later. “Logan wants you,” Matty said with a full mouth. “They’re outside.”
“Who’s outside?” I asked.
“Everyone,” he deadpanned.
When Matty shoved the last piece of cake into his mouth, we walked outside. Aimee and Caleb are whispering to each other on the swinging chair, Darren and Alyssa are fighting over cake near them, and Victor, Jon and Adam are busy telling Finn that he needs to stop having sex and study because his grades are slipping in college.
It’s pretty fun to watch actually.
Finn rolls his eyes and tells them what they want to hear but I know he won’t do it. He’ll just grab Gaby and have his way with her in the laundry room when he walks into the house any minute now.
Kevin, Juan, Max and Shaun are over too with their newest girlfriends. I honestly don’t know why they’re here. I don’t know why everyone is here actually. Kelsey just told me to come by after the wedding. Why everyone is sitting in my dad’s backyard is a mystery to me.
“Can you walk any slower?” Matty asked behind me.
I stopped and made him bump into me.
“Don’t rush me, bitch,” I said.
“Whatever, chubby whore,” Matty said raising an eyebrow as he smiled. My mouth dropped. I know he means that in the nicest way possible but it’s still weird because he knows I fucked a lot of guys before I dated Logan.
“f-uck you! Logan said I was too skinny so he shoves food down my throat,” I snapped.
“Yeah. He just wants you fattened up to get pregnant.” My jaw dropped even further. “Are you pregnant? Because you look like you gained some weight. In a good way. Becky?”
I blinked.
Logan wants me to get pregnant?
Why does Matty know this and not me?!
What the f-uck!
Tears pricked my eyes as I thought about it. Logan never talked to me about this. We’re happy the way we are. I don’t want kids. I mean…not right now.
I’m getting choked up because I never thought about this. Shit. I don’t want to get pregnant because of my tattoos. I’ll look weird afterwards.
“I don’t want kids,” I whisper sobbed.
Why am I so damn emotional?!
Matty’s smile dropped as he saw the change in me. “Shit…um…nevermind. Becky, I was joking,” he said, his eyes scanning the crowd because he’s nervous. “Want more cake?”
“Ugh!” I pushed him out of the way and walked back toward the house. I’m not comfortable. I want out of these flats and I want to be in my bed…eating a bowl of ice cream. I just want to be alone…with food.
“Becky!” Matty tried to grab my arm but I jogged my way back into the house, toward the freezer. I pulled out a carton of ice cream, grabbed a spoon and walked to the living room.
I sat my ass down and turned on the TV.
Now I’m comfortable.
Wait…wasn’t I suppose to be outside?
I don’t remember and I don’t care.
“Hey,” Logan said walking into the living room, eyeing the ice cream. “Why’d you run away?” God, just looking at him makes my libido spike.
“I was hungry,” I said licking the spoon with ice cream. “And Matty called me fat. I’m stress eating.”
Logan slipped onto the couch and turned off the TV.
“You’re not fat,” he said. “You need to gain more weight actually.”
“Yeah,” I said rolling my eyes. “So I can be prepared when you knock me up.”
His eyes widened as he went tense.
“You don’t think about it?” he asked softly, his damn blues taking me in. “Us. Together. Starting a family.”
I ate another spoon of ice cream because I can’t answer that. I never thought about it. I just wanted us to be…happy. We are. Why add more with little messy babies?
“Are you ignoring me?”
I didn’t answer him.
“Aw, don’t ignore me,” Logan said rubbing his nose against my shoulder. “I might cry.” He’s making fun of me. I’ve been emotional for the past week. What an asshole. His lips traveled up my arm to my neck and it was getting harder and harder to ignore him. “I love you.”
I took another spoon of ice cream and nudged him away.
“Why’d you two leave?” Toby asked behind me. “Oh, did you…” Logan looked up and most likely told him now isn’t a good time. Toby walked up to us, I think he shook Logan’s hand and then he left us alone.
“Can I tell you something?” Logan asked reaching for my hand. He unhooked it from the ice cream carton and pressed something into my hand. My eyes tried to see it but Logan turned my hand over. I glanced at him and his eyes were waiting for me.
“What?” I asked.
“Do you remember our first date?” he asked. I nodded. “You told me if I won Hunter, you’d give me whatever I wanted.” My eyes fell to his lips as he spoke and I started thinking about that day. I thought he wanted a sexual favor but he just wanted my middle name.
“Are we going to have sex now?” I asked looking up into his eyes. “You cashing in a sexual favor?” I wouldn’t mind taking him into my old bedroom and doing things.
He smiled and pecked my lips.
“No.” Damn. “I was thinking about something.” His thumb caressed my hand and I was once again trying to see what he’s hiding. “I got you the bear. You told me your middle name.” I nodded. “Well…” He finally let go of my hand. I turned it over and stared at a Hershey’s kiss. “It’s Valentine’s Day,” Logan said as I unwrapped the chocolate. Only…it wasn’t a chocolate. It was almost shaped as one but I unwrapped it and a ring stared back at me. “Will you be my Valentine?” Logan murmured.
My eyes found his.
No…
“Logan,” I stared at the ring in my hands and then back at him. My middle name is Valentine. He’s not talking about me being his valentine, he’s talking about me being his Valentine. “Baby, I was already yours,” I said dropping the carton of ice cream on the coffee table and throwing my arms around him.
I change my mind. I’d want to press pause and live in this moment. Right now. Because it honestly can’t get any better than this. Logan just proposed to me. And he did it in a way that makes me feel special. He made me like my middle name. He just made me feel worth it. Wanted.
“Yes, I’ll be your Valentine,” I said pulling back to hold his eyes. I couldn’t say anything else and the smile on my lips hurts so I crashed my lips against his and let my unspoken words flow between us.
“I love you,” I breathed. “Always.”
He slipped the ring onto my finger and glanced behind us.
“This was supposed to happen outside,” Logan said, looking back at me. “So everyone is waiting.”
“They knew?”
“Why else would they be here? Jacky and Remy are on Skype.” He kissed me again and I melted. Now it all makes sense. “We shouldn’t keep them waiting.”
“Wait…did you ask my dad if this was okay?” I asked glancing at the ring.
Logan smirked and said, “No.”
“Oh, this is going to be good,” I said breaking into a shit eating grin.
Dad loves Logan. He just wants to keep pretending I’m a little girl. And little girls don’t date. Or have sex. Or get married.
Dad will most likely beat the shit out of Logan for this. But then he’ll see how happy I am and rethink everything.
Logan helps me.
In more ways than one.
I love him.
“Baby…” Logan whispered as he leaned into me, his lips brushing my ear softly.
“Mm?” I asked closing my eyes, breathing him in.
“We’re pregnant.”
My eyes snapped open.
No!
This is not happening.
We just got engaged.
This is too fast!
I tried to pull away but Logan wrapped his arms around me and told me how he guessed it for the last two weeks. I don’t even want to know how he could tell. And I got my period last week! It was light but I got it!
Logan’s been shoving food down my throat when the doctor called him and told him to keep watch on me because I’m ‘malnourished.’ Why the doctor didn’t tell me this is a f-ucking mystery. f-ucking douchebag. I’m the mother! I’m going to be a mother! How is this happening?!
“We can do this, Rebeckah,” Logan said pulling away to look at me. His thumb running over my cheek, wiping away the tears is doing nothing to calm me.
I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.
I can’t care for a baby!
I almost ended my life the first time hearing this news.
“What if I can’t–”
“No ‘what-if’s’. Just now. Live in the moment. I’m not letting you go. I won’t let you fall.”
Dammit.
The tears ran down my face as I shook my head.
“You already did,” I whispered.
His brows creased and the curiosity in his eyes made me smile.
“I fell for you.” Duh.
His hands fell to my hips as he dipped his head, his lips hovering over mine.
“Now you need to fly.”
The old me needs to fly. She needs to be free.
I need to be happy. Complete. Loved.
The old me has worries.
The new me has family.
My family.
“Okay,” I breathed, slipping my fingers into his hair. “We can do this.” I f-ucking hope so. Logan’s face is killing me. He loves this. Hopefully so can I. I mean, I have a few months before I blow up like a balloon. I f-ucking hope and pray my tattoos don’t look weird!
I will always be the old Rebeckah. The tattooed, wild party girl. The girl who lost her best friend. The girl who lost herself. I will never forget her but it’s time to let her go.
It’s time she’s set free.
It’s time I start living.
I will fall.
But I have arms that will catch me.
THE END