This Star Won't Go Out

[10:02:02 PM] TERYN: I’ve been wondering myself a bit, too.

[10:02:08 PM] ESTHER: aha. long story time? I’ll probably [be] writing for a while yeah

[10:02:13 PM] TERYN: yeah, what Katy said.

[10:02:15 PM] KATY: we’re here for you lady

[10:02:25 PM] TERYN: okay well, take your time.

[10:02:26 PM] LINDSAY: yeah, i know a bit but not a lot

[10:02:27 PM] TERYN: we’re here <3

[10:05:49 PM] ESTHER: I’ve never really talked about it with internet people, so telling people things in text is kind of awkward. um, in november 2006 I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer, which is not seen like, ever, in kids. it had spread to my lungs, which was not that great. so they removed the tumor, but there was still a load of crap in my lungs, where like you can’t remove things from. so they did some treatments a few times, and it worked a bit. I was in France at that time, then in 2008 we moved back to the US, and they started me on other treatments that worked better. last christmas I had a really serious time where I was pretty seriously sick, but I’ve been improving loads. so um, my diagnosis is thyroid cancer, and it just brought on a load of other problems, which bring other problems. erm. don’t know what else to say about it but I probably didn’t give you like any information on it wohkay.

[10:05:54 PM] VALERIE: ho man

[10:05:57 PM] VALERIE: i love you guys

[10:05:58 PM] ESTHER: aha that was a lot.

[10:06:01 PM] TERYN: reads

[10:06:26 PM] KATY: oh Esther <3333333

[10:06:28 PM] LINDSAY: reads esthers

[10:07:04 PM] DESTINY: Esther <333333333

[10:07:09 PM] VALERIE: freaking heck i don’t want to go to bed now, i wanna talk with you guys [10:07:13 PM] VALERIE: and esther <3

[10:07:18 PM] TERYN: oh Esther <33333333333333 loves



[10:07:20 PM] ARIELLE: esther <3

[10:07:25 PM] DESTINY: as soon as I typed in Esther, I want candy by Aaron Carter came on

[10:07:31 PM] LINDSAY: esther <33

[10:07:34 PM] ARIELLE: haha destiny

[10:07:34 PM] ESTHER: is candy

[10:07:41 PM] LINDSAY: oh baby

[10:08:01 PM] ESTHER: I’m totally fine talking about everything, I just don’t know how to bring it up or what to say about it.

[10:08:03 PM] KATY: I love you gusy!

[10:08:11 PM] DESTINY: same, Esther

[10:08:14 PM] TERYN: Got it, Esther.

[10:08:15 PM] LINDSAY: so are you in remission or what exactly?

[10:08:17 PM] KATY: are you gonna be ok, though, Esther?

[10:08:19 PM] LINDSAY: I LOVE YOU GUYS TOO

[10:08:21 PM] LINDSAY: SO MUCH

[10:08:23 PM] LINDSAY: gusy

[10:08:24 PM] VALERIE: gah i really really have to go now I love you all A LOT and i hope we will have more talks like this [10:08:32 PM] KATY: WE WILL <3

[10:08:32 PM] DESTINY: aw bye Valerie!

[10:08:36 PM] VALERIE: <333333

[10:09:08 PM] ESTHER: goodnight valerie <3

[10:09:11 PM] ESTHER: I love you lots <3

[10:09:35 PM] ESTHER: oh and no, I still have cancer and probably won’t be officially cured of it. but it’s looking good, I guess. still have a lot of other things with it. don’t really know what the future is going to bring, so I tend not to really live ahead :\

[10:09:46 PM] KATY: aww Esther </3

[10:10:03 PM] TERYN: aww Esther

[10:10:06 PM] LINDSAY: esther <333

[10:10:06 PM] TERYN: loves

[10:10:11 PM] ESTHER: loves back

[10:10:11 PM] TERYN: <3

[10:10:21 PM] LINDSAY: i don’t know if i should say this but i’m totally crying right now

[10:10:22 PM] LINDSAY: </3

[10:10:23 PM] TERYN: esther you are amazing

[10:10:32 PM] ESTHER: I love you all so much.

[10:10:33 PM] LINDSAY: YOU ARE SO AMAZING

[10:10:35 PM] LINDSAY: I LOVE YOU

[10:10:35 PM] ARIELLE: yes esther you are totally amazing!

[10:10:36 PM] KATY: Lindsay, I’m close

[10:10:37 PM] KATY: </3

[10:10:44 PM] ESTHER: I’m pretty freaking close to crying

[10:10:45 PM] TERYN: I’m tearing up

[10:10:52 PM] KATY: #girly

[10:10:52 PM] ARIELLE: me too

[10:10:52 PM] ESTHER: I’m kinda shaky

[10:12:23 PM] TERYN: God Esther, I like . . . you’re awesome. That you keep going. I know that may seem sort of strange, because you didn’t really have a choice, but seriously. It makes you epic. And keep going. And I love you.

[10:12:39 PM] ESTHER: <33

[10:12:40 PM] LINDSAY: yeah

[10:12:42 PM] TERYN: <3

[10:12:55 PM] LINDSAY: esther has always been epic

[10:12:58 PM] LINDSAY: this just adds on

[10:13:04 PM] ESTHER: hahaha <3

[10:09:27 PM] ARIELLE: okay so here’s a question: Other than

nerdfighting and harry potter what is something you are really passionate about?

[10:30:18 PM] ESTHER: I haven’t found my one thing to be passionate about, but childhood cancer sucks. and I know that there are so many amazing causes that help, but going through it kind of changes the way I view things and it’s just, I don’t know. not really finding a cure, cause I don’t have the resources for that. but helping people who have to go through that feel better.

[11:00:45 PM] ARIELLE: i love you people