A Christmas Bride

CHAPTER ELEVEN

KAYLEEN LOOKED AT all the designs spread out on the large dining room table. “You’re kidding,” she said.

This is only from today’s mail,” Lina told her with a sigh. “I never thought anything I did would make designers notice me. I certainly buy nice clothes, but I’m not that into fashion. Besides, I gave up being trendy years ago. But the second Hassan announced our engagement, I started getting calls.” She flipped through the sketches of wedding gowns. “He was supposed to wait, you know. He promised.” She sounded more exasperated than actually annoyed.

He said he couldn’t stand to keep his happy news a secret,” Kayleen told her with a smile. “I saw the news conference. He was giddy.”

Lina grinned. “Don’t tell him that. He’ll explain that a king is never giddy.”

He was this one time. I’m glad you’re so happy.”

Me, too.” Lina sighed. “I’ve really liked my life. I’ve been blessed. Even though I lost my husband so early, I had my brother’s sons to fill the void. I was okay with that. I was going to grow old taking care of their children. Now, suddenly, I’m in love and engaged. I still can’t believe it.”

Kayleen glanced at Lina’s ring—the diamonds glittering on the platinum band made her engagement ring look like a tiny toy. “You’re going to have to start exercising more if you’re going to carry that around all day.”

Lina laughed. “I know. It’s huge. So not my taste, but if you’d seen the look on Hassan’s face when he put it on my finger. He was so proud. How am I supposed to tell him I’d like something smaller than a mountain?”

If it doesn’t really matter to you, you don’t.”

You’re right.” Lina picked up a design and studied it. “You’re going to have to go through all this as soon as your wedding is announced.”

Hopefully on a much smaller scale,” Kayleen told her, knowing being royal was going to take a lot of getting used to. “I only ever wanted to belong to a family. Now I have a whole country.”

There are perks.”

I’m not that interested in the perks.”

Which is why I’m glad As’ad picked you,” Lina told her. “I know you’re not in it for the money.” She set down the design and picked up another. “I’ll admit I’m hoping you’ll fall in love with him.”

Kayleen felt herself blush. “I’ve thought about it,” she admitted. “He’s a good man. Thoughtful and kind. He really cares about the girls. He takes care of things. He makes me feel safe. I know I like him, but love? What does that feel like?”

Like you can hold the stars in the palm of your hand,” Lina said, then laughed. “I sound foolish.”

You sound happy.”

I am. Hassan is my world. Oh, I know that will change, we’ll settle into something more normal. But for now, I’m enjoying the magic. The way my heart beats faster when he walks in a room. The way he can take my breath away with a simple kiss. I only want to be with him.”

So I’m boring you?” Kayleen teased.

Lina laughed. “Not exactly. But I think about him all the time. It was different before. When I was young. I loved my husband, but I didn’t appreciate what I had. Now that I’m older, I understand how precious love is. How rare.” She turned to Kayleen. “I think you already know that, because of how you grew up.”

I know it’s something I want. It’s important to me. I want to love As’ad. I already love the girls.”

Then you’re halfway there. Just give things time.”

We have that,” Kayleen murmured.

You have your life. After you’re married, you can start having children of your own.”

Kayleen touched her stomach. A baby. It had always been her secret dream. The one she wouldn’t allow herself to think of very often.

Lina sighed. “I’d love to get pregnant. I’m a little old, but I’m going to try.”

Really?”

The princess nodded. “I always wanted children. While my nephews have been a source of endless delight, I confess I still have the fantasy of my own child. Hassan is willing to try. We’ll see. If it is meant to be, then it will happen. If not, I still have the man of my dreams.”

* * *

I’M NERVOUS,” KAYLEEN told As’ad as they walked into the auditorium at the American School. “I’ve been working with the girls. I know in my head they’ll be fine, but I’m still terrified.”

Yet they are the ones performing.”

I want them to do well so they’ll be happy,” she said. “I don’t want them to feel bad.”

Then you should have faith in them. They have practiced. They are ready.”

You make it sound so logical.”

Is it not?”

No, it’s not. It’s horrible. I think I’m going to throw up.”

As’ad laughed and pulled her close. “Ah, Kayleen, you delight me.”

By vomiting? Imagine how excited you’ll be when I get a fever.” She grumbled, but in truth she enjoyed the feel of his arm around her and the heat of his body next to hers. Not only for the tingle that shot through her, but because the sensation was familiar. She’d leaned against him enough to know it was him. She would be able to pick him out blindfolded—by touch or scent alone. She’d never been able to think that before.

They took seats toward the front, by the aisle. Kayleen was vaguely aware that people were looking at them, but she was too nervous for the girls to notice or feel uncomfortable. A thousand horrible scenarios ran through her mind. What if Dana forgot her lines or Nadine tripped or Pepper decided to teach some bully a lesson?

As’ad took her hand and squeezed her fingers. “You must breathe. Slowly. Relax. All will be well.”

You don’t know that.”

I know that your panic will in no way influence the outcome and it will only make you more uncomfortable.”

Again with the logic. It’s really annoying.”

She glanced at him and he smiled. She smiled back and felt something tug at her belly. Something that felt a lot like a connection. It startled her and made the rest of the room fade away. In that moment, there was only As’ad and she didn’t want anyone or anything else.

A few minutes later, the orchestra began and the curtains parted. The pageant went from the youngest students to the oldest, so it wasn’t long before Pepper appeared on stage with her class. They did a skit about a frog family snowed in for the holidays. Pepper was the mother frog.

Kayleen mouthed the girl’s lines along with her, only relaxing when she left the stage at the end of the skit.

A flawless performance,” As’ad murmured. “You worry for nothing.”

Maybe my worrying is what made it perfect.”

You do not have that much power. Nadine is next. I believe she will dance. That will be enjoyable to watch.”

Sure enough, Nadine and several of her classmates danced to music from The Nutcracker. Kayleen willed her to hold her positions exactly long enough and exhaled when the music ended and the girls were still.

You will wear yourself out,” As’ad told her.

I can’t help it. I love them.”

He looked into her eyes. “Do you?”

Of course. How could I not?”

Something flashed through his eyes—something she couldn’t read. “I was most fortunate to find you. Not that I can take total credit.” He smiled. “We must send Tahir, the desert chieftain, a gift of thanks.”

Maybe a fruit basket.”

I was thinking more of a camel.”

That can be tricky,” she told him. “Don’t you hate it when all you get in a year is camels?”

You mock me.”

Mostly I’m mocking the camel.”

Another class took the stage, then Dana’s group appeared. Once again Kayleen held her breath, willing the preteen to get through all the lines without messing up.

Partway through the performance, As’ad took her hand in his. “You may squeeze my fingers, if that helps.”

She did and felt a little better. When Dana finally left the stage, Kayleen slumped back in exhaustion.

I’m glad we only have to do that a few times a year,” she said. “I couldn’t stand it.”

You will grow more used to this as the girls are in more performances.”

I don’t want to think about it. I’m not sure my heart could take it.”

Then brace yourself. There is one more surprise yet to come.”

She turned to him. “What are you talking about?”

You’ll see. All will be revealed when we leave here.”

Kayleen really wanted to whine that she wanted to know now, but managed to keep quiet. She fidgeted until the last song ended, then followed As’ad out of the auditorium. Only to step into an impossible-to-imagine scene of snow.

It fell from the sky, cold and wet and delightful. The children were already outside, running and screaming. Kayleen held out her hands, then laughed as the snow landed on her palms.

It’s real,” she said.

As’ad shrugged. “Dana mentioned missing snow, as did the other girls. I thought they would enjoy this.”

It was only then that Kayleen noticed the roar of the large snow-making machine off to the side of the parking lot.

You arranged it?” she asked, stunned by the thoughtful gift.

Neil arranged it. I simply gave the order.”

It wasn’t just simple, she thought. As’ad had thought about the girls, about how this time of year would be difficult for them, and he’d done his best to make it better.

Dana came running up to them. “It’s snowing! I can’t believe it.”

She flung herself at As’ad, who caught her and held her. Then Nadine was there and Pepper and he was holding all of them.

Kayleen watched them, her eyes filling with happy tears. It was a perfect moment, she thought.

Her chest ached, but not in a scary way. Instead it seemed that her heart had grown too big to hold all her emotions. Light filled her until she was sure it poured from her body.

The world around them shrank until there was only As’ad and the children he held. She wanted to hold that moment forever, to never forget the image or the feelings.

The director of the school came up to greet them and the spell was broken. Dana crossed to Kayleen and hugged her.

Isn’t this the best?”

It’s wonderful,” Kayleen told her. “All of it. You did really well. I was scared, but you didn’t seem nervous at all.”

It was fun,” Dana said. “I’ve never been in a play before. I like it. I think I want to go into drama next year.” She raised her face to the snow. “Can you believe this?”

Kayleen looked at the tall, handsome prince who had asked her to marry him. The man who spoke of their life together, of children and who made it snow in the desert because it brought a smile to a child’s face.

No, I can’t,” she admitted, even as she realized she now knew exactly what it felt like to be in love.

* * *

AS’AD WATCHED THE children play in the snow and was pleased with his gift. All was going well. Lina had told him to pay attention to the females in his life—that for a small amount of effort, he would receive much in return. She had been right.

He heard Kayleen’s laughter and found her in the crowd. With her hair like fire and her hazel eyes, she was a brightly colored flamingo in a flock of crows. He was proud to have her as his bride. She would provide him with strong, healthy sons and serve the people of his country well. She would keep him satisfied at night and, if the emotions he’d seen in her eyes earlier told the truth, love him.

He knew it was important for a woman to love her husband. That life was much easier for them both when her heart was engaged. He had hoped Kayleen would come around and she had. She would be content in their marriage, as would he. He could not ask for more.

* * *

I’M EXHAUSTED,” KAYLEEN said as she slumped in the back of the limo. “All that worrying, then the snowball fight. If this keeps up much more, I’m going to have to start working out.”

I do not wish you to change anything about yourself,” As’ad told her.

Words to make her heart beat faster, she thought as he pulled her into his arms and kissed her.

At the first brush of his mouth, her entire body stirred in anticipation. She was eager to taste him, touch him, be with him. Unfortunately the trip back to the palace was only a few minutes.

Perhaps later,” he murmured, kissing her mouth, her cheeks, her jaw.

Yes,” she whispered. “I am very available.”

An excellent quality.”

Far too soon, they arrived at the palace. A royal guard opened the passenger door and As’ad stepped out. He held out his hand to her. As she took it, she saw King Mukhtar in the courtyard. He seemed very pleased with himself as he spoke with a woman Kayleen had never seen before.

Who is that?” she asked.

I do not know.”

The woman was of average height, with platinum-blond hair teased and sprayed into a curly mass. Heavy makeup covered her face, almost blurring her features. She wore a too-tight sweater and jeans tucked into high-heeled boots. Inappropriate clothing for someone visiting a palace.

Kayleen had never seen her before but as she walked toward the king and his guest, she got an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach.

King Mukhtar saw her and beamed. “My dear, you are back. Excellent. I have a surprise.” He put his hand on his companion’s back and urged her forward. “Do you remember when we were walking in the garden shortly after you arrived? You mentioned your family. Specifically how you did not remember your mother and did not know her whereabouts.”

Kayleen jerked her attention back to the badly dressed woman and wanted to be anywhere but here. It wasn’t possible. Nothing that horrible could really be happening.

I have found her,” the king said proudly. “Here she is. Kayleen, this is your mother. Darlene Dubois.”

The woman smiled broadly. “Hi, baby. Why, Kayleen, you’re just so pretty. I knew you would be. Let me look at you. You’re all grown up. How old are you now? Nineteen? Twenty?”

Twenty-five.”

Oh, my. Well, don’t go telling people that. They’ll think I’m getting old. Although I was only sixteen when you were born.” She held out her arms. “Come on, now. I’ve missed you so much! Give your mama a hug.”

Trapped by the manners instilled in her by caring nuns, Kayleen moved forward reluctantly and found herself hugged and patted by the stranger.

Could this woman really be her mother? If so, shouldn’t she feel a connection or be excited? Why was her only emotion dread?

Isn’t this fabulous?” Darlene asked as she stepped back, then linked arms with Kayleen. “After all these years. You won’t believe how shocked I was when that nice man on the king’s staff called and invited me to El Deharia. I confess I had to look it up on a map.” She smiled at the king. “I had to leave high school when I got pregnant. Since then, I’ve been pursuing a career in show business. It hasn’t left much time for higher education.”

Or contact with her family, Kayleen thought bitterly, remembering standing alone on the steps of the orphanage while her grandmother told her that no one wanted her and that she would have to stay with the nuns.

But what about my mommy?” Kayleen had cried.

You think she cares? She dumped you with me when you were a baby. You’re just lucky I put up with you all these years. I’ve done my duty. Now you’re on your own. You’ll grow up right with those nuns looking after you. Now stop your crying. And don’t try to find me or your mama again. You hear?”

The memory was so clear, Kayleen could feel the rain hitting her cheeks. She knew it was rain because it was cold, unlike the tears that burned their way down her skin.

Kayleen, would you like to show your mother to her rooms?” the king asked. “She is on the same floor as you and the girls. The suite next to yours. I knew you would want to be close.”

Kayleen was happy that one of them was sure of something. She felt sick to her stomach and caught by circumstances. She looked at As’ad, who watched her carefully.

What girls?” Darlene asked. “Do you have

babies of your own?”

Darlene sounded delighted, but for some reason Kayleen didn’t believe her. The other woman didn’t seem the type to be excited about being a grandmother.

They’re adopted,” As’ad told her. “My children.”

Kayleen introduced them, using the chance to disentangle herself from her mother.

A prince?” Darlene cooed. “My baby marrying a prince. Does that just beat all.” She smiled at the king. “You have very handsome sons, sir. They take after you.”

Mukhtar smiled. “I like to think so.”

Kayleen couldn’t believe this was happening. It didn’t feel real. She looked at As’ad and found him watching her. There was something quizzical in his expression, as if he’d never seen her before.

What was he thinking? Was he looking at her mother and searching for similarities? Was he uncomfortable with the living reminder that she didn’t come from a socially connected family? That she would be of no use to him that way?

Your mother must be tired from her journey,” the king said. “Let us keep you no longer.”

I’ll arrange to have your luggage sent up,” As’ad told the other woman. “Kayleen, I’ll see you later.”

She nodded because she had no idea what to say. Both the king and As’ad left, abandoning Kayleen to a stranger with greedy eyes.

Well, look at you,” Darlene drawled when they were alone. “Who would have thought my baby girl would grow up and land herself a prince. I’m so happy for you, honey.” She grabbed a strand of Kayleen’s hair and rubbed it between her fingers. “God, I hate that color. Mine’s exactly the same. It costs a fortune to keep it bleached, but it’s worth every penny. Men prefer blondes. Although you’re carrying the color off great and the prince obviously likes it.” She looked Kayleen up and down. “You could pass for Vivian’s twin.”

Who’s Vivian?”

My sister. Your aunt. You had to have met her before, when you were living with my mama.” She looked around at the vast entrance hall. “Did you get lucky or what? I couldn’t believe it when that guy who works for the king called and asked if you were my daughter. After all this time, I had no idea what had happened to you.” She smiled. “Imagine my surprise to see what you’ve become. My little girl. Come on. Show me what life is like in the palace.”

Kayleen led her down the hallway. Her head hurt. This couldn’t be happening. Not after all these years. Not now, when she was engaged to As’ad.

Then she scolded herself for not being happier to see her mother. The woman had given birth to her, after all. Then abandoned her. But shouldn’t she be able to forgive that?

Rather than try to decide now, Kayleen talked about the history of the palace. She took Darlene to the room next to hers and walked inside.

The other woman followed, then breathed a sigh of sheer pleasure as she took in the view of the Arabian Sea and the elegant furnishings filling the large space.

Oh, I like living like this,” Darlene said. “How did you get from that convent to here?”

Kayleen looked at her, trying not to notice that under the layers of makeup, they had the same eyes. “You knew about that? Where they sent me?”

Sure. Mama kept complaining about how much trouble you were. I got tired of hearing it and told her to take you there. I knew, ah, you’d be cared for real well. So how’d you get here?”

I took a teaching job at the convent school here. I’m a teacher.”

Darlene looked amused. “Seriously? You teach children? Interesting.”

Kayleen watched her move around the room. “Your last name is Dubois?”

Darlene nodded without looking at her. She lifted up a small Waterford clock, as if checking the weight and the value.

Is that my last name?”

Darlene glanced at her. “What are you talking about?”

I never knew. When my grandmother dropped me off at the orphanage, I didn’t know my last name. Everyone in the house had a different one. Grandmother wouldn’t say which was mine. I had to make one up.”

Darlene grinned. “I made mine up, too. What did you pick?”

James. From the King James Bible.”

I prefer Tennessee Williams myself.” Darlene started opening cabinets. “Can you drink in this place?”

Yes. Right there.” Kayleen pointed to the carved doors hiding the fully stocked wet bar.

Darlene found the ice and fixed herself a vodka tonic, then took a long drink. “Better,” she said with a sigh. She walked to the sofa and sat down, then patted the seat next to her. “You’re going to start at the beginning and tell me everything.”

Kayleen stayed where she was. “About what?”

The story here. You’re really engaged to that prince?”

Yes. There will be a formal announcement in a few weeks and a wedding in the spring.”

Darlene took another drink. “So you’re not pregnant. I’d wondered if you were.”

Kayleen tried not to be insulted. “I didn’t have to trick As’ad into marrying me.”

Of course not. I didn’t mean to imply you would. Still, you have to be sensible. Do you have a prenuptial agreement? How many millions is he offering? Do you have an attorney? I wonder if you could get one to fly out and help.”

Kayleen took a step back. “I don’t need an attorney. As’ad has promised the girls and I will be taken care of.”

And you believe him? You’re lucky I’m here.”

Kayleen doubted that. “Why are you here?”

Because I finally found my long-lost daughter.”

You knew I was in the convent all those years. That’s hardly lost.”

Darlene shrugged. “You’re much more interesting now, honey.”

Because of As’ad.” It wasn’t a question.

Partly. Oh, Kayleen, life was hard for me when you were young. I couldn’t take care of a baby, I was just a baby myself. You’re grown-up. You can see that. Then I lost track of you. But now we’re together.”

Kayleen found it difficult to believe she would have been so hard to find.

Darlene stood. “I’m your mother. I want what’s best for you. If you really expect this prince to marry you, you’re going to have to keep him interested. I can help you with that. Otherwise, some rich socialite will steal him away. We don’t want that, do we?”

I find it hard to believe you care anything about me,” Kayleen said, feeling both anger and guilt. What was she supposed to believe? “You never did before.”

Don’t say that. Of course I cared. But I had a career. You were better off with those nuns. They took real good care of you.”

How would you know?”

It’s the kind of people they are. Am I wrong?”

No,” Kayleen told her. “They’re exactly who you’d think they would be.”

Then you should thank me.” She walked to the bar and fixed a second drink. “I’m not leaving, Kayleen. The king thinks he’s done you a big favor, finding me and bringing me here. I, for one, agree with him. You’re my baby girl and that means something to me. We’re going to get to know each other, you and I. Now run along. I need to rest. We’ll talk about this more later.”

Kayleen left. Not because she’d been told to, but because she couldn’t stand to be there anymore.

She didn’t know what to think about Darlene. She’d never really allowed herself to imagine what her mother was like—it hurt too much to think about all she’d lost. But this woman wasn’t anyone’s fantasy.

Then Kayleen thought about what the Mother Superior would say about judging someone so quickly. Maybe Darlene was sorry about their lost relationship. Maybe they could at least learn to be friends. Didn’t Kayleen owe her to give her a chance to prove herself?