“Not happening.”
“Wait, I’m not finished. I dare you to get in the ocean and it has to be deep enough to get that hair of yours wet. None of that toe in the water shit.”
I stared at him, feeling backed in a corner. “I hate you.”
“I know and it’s really fun to watch you squirm.”
“I’m not squirming.”
“Then get in.”
He wanted to play. Fine. I could make him squirm too. Even though I brought a suit on the trip, the black bikini stayed in my suitcase. My underwear didn’t match but hopefully, it wouldn’t get to the whole set. My stomach felt a little nervous as my fingers unbuttoned my denim shorts. I paused on the zipper, looking hard into his blue eyes. Pulling the tab, I let go and the pair fell to my ankles. I kicked them to the side, never breaking eye contact.
“Your turn.”
“What are you doin’, Al?”
“Your dare. Oh, and I’m not going alone. Start stripping.”
Jess watched me, trying to gauge my end game. With a quick motion, he pulled his t-shirt over his head and tossed it on the sand next to my shorts. “I believe it’s your turn, Alex.”
I wore a gray, plaid flannel shirt because it was chilly tonight with the sun gone. My fingers fumbled with the button holes while I kept my eyes on his face. I moved slowly to the next one, revealing a little more skin. I had his attention. The teasing smirk evaporated as he watched me undress. I swallowed hard. Jess didn’t seem to notice as he stayed focused on my fingers taking my shirt off. Reaching the end, I let the fabric slide off my arms. I stood clad in only my white lace trimmed panties and gray cotton bra. The thin fabric clung over each cold B cup.
I stood just a few steps away from Jess; close enough for him to reach out and touch. I knew he was focused on me without clothes. Wasn’t that the point? Distract to get out of this dare. Distract to keep from talking. Sadie’s warning came back and I pushed it away. It was just a stupid child’s game.
“Jess?”
“Hmm?”
“Your turn. Well unless you’re saying I win.”
“Not a chance. You tell me why we’re out here or I guess we keep goin’.”
His pestering smile returned as he watched me fidget. Jess unfastened the front of his jeans and paused to study my reaction. A surge of panic shot through my gut. I assumed he had boxers underneath those tight pants. What if tonight, of all nights, that boy went commando? My face got red at the thought of seeing him completely naked. Jess winked, and then let the denim fall to the ground, revealing a pair of form fitted boxer. He threw them in the growing pile of clothes on the sand.
“Your turn.”
Top or bottom. I had to drop one more. Damn! Why couldn’t I have worn a tank top under the shirt? Jess laughed as I struggled, my cheeks getting redder by the second.
“You don’t have to do this. Just tell me what’s got you so twisted up tonight.”
I didn’t want to tell him yet. I changed my mind. I wanted to wait until we got back. Telling him tonight would ruin the trip. Looking back into his blue eyes, I agreed to still play this game.
Slipping my fingers behind my back, grabbed the hooks of my bra. I felt nervous even though it was nothing Jess hadn’t seen in the past. My stomach clenched at the thought. I wished tonight was the first time for Jess to see me naked; his sweet face transfixed, waiting for me to show him something he had wanted all these years. Instead, I remembered the anger and pain that wrecked him as he watched that video. I wished for a do-over, but those only existed in the movies; the stupid unrealistic ones with time travel. I changed my mind and reached for my panties, inching them lower over my hips.
Jess frowned. “Wait, Al. That's enough.”
He grabbed me and tossed my whole body over his shoulder. My red hair flung out in every direction as my head bobbed against his back. He walked out into the water. The tips of my hair brushed the waves. Jess pretended to drop me head-first. I let out a scream and hit his legs with my fists. He changed his grip and tipped me forward. I slid down his chest, letting out a scream from the shock of the water. My feet searched frantically for the bottom.
“I’ve got you. I won’t let go.”
“You promise?” My fingers gripped his shoulders tight.
“Trust me, ok?” I smelled the faint scent of beer on his breath. He talked softly as our noses bumped in the rippling water. “Don’t be afraid. Just relax. You can stand up here. We aren’t that far out.”
I nodded, letting myself settle against him. I uncurled my toes and extended my feet. The bottom felt both soft and rough with fragments of sea shells. The ocean frightened the crap out of me during the day; a loud, dark swirl of destruction, pulling everything in its path back to the big unknown. Tonight, Jess made it a place of calm surrender.
His blue eyes watched me and he grinned. “Tonight’s our first time.” I felt startled at his words. He laughed at my reaction. “To really be in the ocean together.”
“Oh.” A wall of water hit me from the side, plunging burning salt in my nose and eyes.
“You have to jump.”
“Ok.” I let go to wipe my face, and then quickly latched my arm back to his shoulder.
“Jump!”
I pushed off from the sand. We rose up together, in a tangle of limbs under the dark water before sinking to the bottom. The next wave brought us back up and slowly down, creating a beautiful underwater ballet. I smiled. He laughed. I laughed. He smiled. We jumped high into the next incoming wave.
“Wanna go deeper?”
“Isn’t it too late with the tide?”
“Nah. Come on.” He cupped my butt cheeks in each hand, pulling me up around his waist. My thighs dug tight into his sides in fear of floating away in the dark abyss. “Keep your feet locked. I won’t drop you.”
“Promise?”
“No.” Jess winked even though he held me tight against his body. He moved further out in the dark water. “You’re gonna kill me one of these days.”
“What for?”
“I’ll be old with a cane, tryin’ to fish your stupid ass out of some pond you fell in. You yellin’ ‘bout not swimmin’ and me drownin’ cause the arthritis.”
“That’s not even realistic.”
“Maybe.” His eyes glowed back at me, turning darker in the moonlight. “You remember the last time I dragged you through the water?”
“Possum Kingdom.”
“Yup. You were sittin’ up there on top of that cliff scared shitless. I wasn’t sure what to do with you. Throw you off the top or just kiss you.”
“You wanted to kiss me that day? You never told me that.”
“I know.”
The wave splashed, pushing us up in a weightless float. I tightened my thighs, digging into his waist. As the water rolled back, my arms clung to his neck, our noses just a fraction apart. His wet hair covered his eyes.
Letting go of his neck, I moved the dark pieces back from his forehead. My fingers traced down his skin and brushed the drops of water hanging off his long eyelashes. I followed down his cheeks to his pink lips. My fingers brushed across the bottom one. My heart beat fast in my chest. I bet they tasted salty if I kissed them. My thoughts twisted around as I stared at his lips. I remembered what it felt like to kiss Jess. It had been four years since that day on the meadow, and I still knew exactly how it felt to have his tongue in my mouth; a sweet piece of erotic heaven I’d tried to block out of my memory.
“Al, what are we doin’ out here?”
“Uh...what?” I swallowed hard, feeling the burn of every place his skin touched me in the cold water. His scrunched-up eyebrows came back into focus. I fought the embarrassing red stain spreading on my cheeks and I wondered if my thoughts were that transparent.
“Ok, let’s go back to the beach. It’s time for you to start talkin’. Whatever has you twisted up must be pretty bad if you picked gettin’ in the water over tellin’ me.”
“Wait. I…”