Chapter Thirty-six
“You have fun?” Thayer asked as he opened up the door to his family’s cabin.
Severine smiled. “I did.” And I will. “Your friends are awesome. I want to hang out with them again.”
“Why? So you can hear more embarrassing stories about my past?”
“That...plus Morgan reminds me of Lily. You can never have too many Lilys in your life.”
Thayer laughed as he shut the door. “You’re a poet when you’re drunk. Anyone ever tell you that?”
Severine shrugged off her jacket and placed it on the banister. When she turned back around Thayer stared at her with a hungry expression. “Tonight was amazing,” he said slowly, like it was painful for the words to come out of his month. “I liked having you to myself. Am I f*cked up for thinking that?”
Severine shook her head. “No.” He still stood awkwardly by the door. “You can come closer.”
His steps to her made the distance seem like nothing. When he was in front of her, Severine craned her neck back. “Even with heels, I still have to look up.”
Thayer grinned darkly. His hands settled underneath the curve of her butt. He picked her up, and easily set her on the kitchen counter. The granite counter was cold beneath her exposed thighs.
“You still tower over me. We’re supposed to be eye level.”
He remained silent. Everything was always silent with him. He moved his hands onto her thighs, and Severine flinched at the action. His smirk was now a smile as he lifted her legs and motioned for her to wrap them around his waist.
She gulped, and he lowered his arms. He moved his head closer, until their faces were inches apart. “I think this is better.”
Severine nodded her head in agreement. Thayer seemed composed and relaxed. Her heart was slowly dying. It’d be in pieces before the night was over.
She wasn’t used to being this off-kilter. It caused all of her actions to be unsure.
Her hands moved up his arms, and she gripped his biceps painfully. All she wanted was for him to feel her agony. Severine was completely within his reach.
She couldn’t run away fast enough. She couldn’t get close enough.
His hands took over her face as he looked at her closely. There it was—that smirk. “Look at them.”
“What?”
He rubbed his thumb across her cheeks. “Your freckles. You can barely see them from far away.” His grey eyes clashed with her own. She stared back. They mixed a new shade for the world. It’d never fit, though. Together, they’d never fit.
One of his hands reached behind her and touched her hair. Her eyes widened but not out of pain. They wanted to close, and she was afraid what would happen after that.
Thayer brought his hand back and held her face once again. His nose connected with hers. As he spoke, his lips touched hers. “You’re right. Eye level is much better.”
Severine leaned closer, but Thayer retreated. She wanted to groan. He was building her up.
“What about now? Am I wrong to be this close, Severine? Do you think this is too much?” His eyes glinted with a challenge. “Are you going to call it a night?”
Blood was thicker than water. The two of them both knew how f*cked up this was. Severine had the potential to collapse two brothers deeper into a hatred that had already pulled them apart. She didn’t want every action to focus on that. They could consist of something further than that.
Presently, Severine didn’t care where Thayer belonged, or who he was connected to. It didn’t matter. She just craved a place with him.
His skin felt like fire as her fingers dragged down his arms and to his back. He moved closer, still waiting for her to answer. He stopped moving away and settled his mouth on hers. Her lips moved persistently, trying to show him exactly what she felt. Severine wanted him to know how badly she needed this. His right hand touched the side of her cheek as he pulled away and placed his head on her shoulder. His breath came out choppy, and Severine placed her hands on his back. The muscles flinched, and he groaned.
He lifted his head enough to look down at her. Millions of questions were in his eyes, but he stayed silent and stared. Severine’s lips curved in a half smile, and Thayer followed the action with his eyes.
“Is this too much, Thayer? Are you going to call it a night?” She turned his words around on him; her voice barely let the words pass. He looked a little afraid. Unsure. His true emotions were showing.
“Just another kiss, Thayer.” Her lips were on his as she spoke the last of her words. “That’s all.”
He nodded and lowered his face again. They both knew it was a lie.
This time, they clashed together. All of their turbulent emotions came to surface. She felt completely out of control. Every part of her was desolate. With a simple kiss, Thayer could encompass all of her. Lightly, he bit down on her bottom lip. Severine moaned and her fingers dug into his neck as he lifted her off the counter and staggered toward the stairs.
His steps were rushed as he hurried up the stairs. Severine guided her fingers back to his face and crept her tongue into his mouth.
Her feet touched the surface of the second floor, but her lips stayed connected to his. Thayer backed up into her room, and Severine followed. Their positions changed as Thayer directed her away from the door. Too much was between them. Severine tugged at his shirt with antsy fingers. He pulled away impatiently to pull his shirt from his body and came back for more.
Her eyes looked at his body with greed. Her cool fingers touched the skin of his stomach; it was hot to the touch. Slowly, she drifted her fingers down the ridges of his stomach and toward the edge of his boxers. Thayer sharply inhaled, and Severine smiled.
The laughter was sucked out of her the minute she felt his hands push her dress up and away from her skin, and over her head. She stood in front of him in only her panties and bra. There wasn’t a thought to cover herself. She wanted Thayer to see every part of her. If she was going to be altered by this, she wanted to make sure he was too.
So much was being manipulated and warped in this moment. Her legs wrapped around him before she could think twice. He reeled backwards, and his shoulders slammed against the door loudly. He craned his head up to keep their lips in place. And with her hands placed on the door above his head, she moved higher. Severine moved against his dick, and he groaned harshly. It sounded painful.
Thayer abruptly dislodged their lips and placed his forehead against her chest. “Shit, Severine.” His words came out rough. She leaned her forehead atop his head.
“What the hell are you doing to me?”
She breathed as heavily as him, and it scared her. She never felt this wild, this free. “I need control of this.”
“You want to control me? Then do it.” His words came out instantly. “No other girl can say that. Only you, Severine.”
She looked at him blankly. His hands reached up to grab her face, but all she felt were his words. They cradled her closely.
The two of them held each other’s stare. Severine moved her hands away from the door and linked her fingers at the back of his neck. He lowered her slightly, and their faces were level.
No one wanted to feel weak. Right now, Severine felt completely broken. She shifted, and Thayer let her slide down his body.
He was challenging her. All Thayer wanted from her right now was to admit that she wasn’t in control of anything between them. Part of her realized it.
She barely nodded her head, and Thayer pushed her toward the bed. She fell back and watched as he took off his belt and jeans. It was only for a moment, but he paused and stared down at her body. Goosebumps broke out across her skin, and the process followed wherever his gaze went.
He finally lowered himself and hooked an arm around her waist before his skin connected with her own. Her fingers inspected his arms and back. He inhaled a sharp breath but kept his face above her body, watching her every reaction. When his fingers moved toward the clasp of her bra, Severine abruptly shifted positions and straddled his waist.
“Severine,” Thayer heaved out her name. It made her lose control.
Her fingers moved to the clasp of her bra, and slowly she parted the material. He watched the action without blinking. Severine held her finger out to the side and dropped the piece of lace to the floor.
When she settled her arms next to his shoulders, Thayer reached a hand out to touch her. Severine moved backed. “Thayer,” Severine cooed. “Do you want this to go slowly?”
He lifted his hips in the air as he spoke. “With you? Yes.”
Severine settled her fingers on the edge on his boxers and lowered them enough for her to touch the one part of him that was guaranteed to make him lose his control. “I’m not patient,” Severine breathed out.
The two of them stared at each other. She wasn’t walking away from this now. Nothing was going to stop her. She lowered her face, and her hair curtained around them, closing them off from everything. When she looked at him, she knew he couldn’t see her expression, or the truth in her eyes. “With you, I want to be.”
Thayer said nothing back. He nodded his head, moved them across the bed and covered her. His head drifted to her chest. Severine glanced down and watched him lick her nipple. The contact was dangerous. When she moaned loudly, she didn’t care. Everything right now felt within her reach, and control. A part of her brain warned her that she was close to losing the power that she always held tight.
For now, she’d relish the feel of having him close.
Thayer pushed down her underwear and looked up at her from underneath his eyelashes. She swore he did it deliberately. There was nothing blocking them from touching. Barriers of clothing that normally hid everything back were shed. His skin touched hers at the same time his lips devoured her own. Severine groaned harshly and gripped the muscles in his back.
When Thayer pulled away, his actions demanded attention. Severine complied. He hovered above her, close to losing himself as much as Severine. Nothing else would give her relief—except him.
“Do I have all your thoughts tonight, Severine?” Thayer asked.
Severine wasn’t given the time to answer the question. He entered her before she had the chance.
Delirium was setting in. He paused completely inside her. Severine glanced up wildly and realized he was waiting for her to answer. She didn’t have the willpower to sit still.
Shouldn’t her body answer how much she wanted this? How much she wanted him? A frenzy was building; she wanted this moment with him. They hadn’t even started, and her body was already losing its mind.
“Yes! You do!” Severine finally screamed.
When he moved, the abatement she needed placated through her body. Her eyes clenched tightly together, and Severine relied on feelings. Everything was by touch.
Her legs wrapped around his hips. His fingers wrapped behind her neck.
Everything built quickly around them, as Severine moved her hips. Thayer went further, and she moaned. Their movement drifted far away from her as she screamed and dug her fingers into his back.
“F*ck! Severine,” Thayer hollered. His words touched her skin as he collapsed on her.
Severine’s eyes stayed rooted on the ceiling. Her body felt at peace, but her mind was already running, already in a panic.
Thayer moved his body and covered their bodies with the blankets at the end of the bed.
His large hand branded her hip and tugged her close. She didn’t have the option of moving away.
The sun slowly started to rise. It gave enough light for Severine to see the light gray eyes in front of her, staring at her with possession. “I’m not leaving.”
Severine moved her hair away from her face and stared back. “I didn’t ask you to.”
He nodded, and Severine laid her head on the pillow. The warmth the two of them created lulled Severine close to the brink of sleep. “Maybe you should know this now.” Severine’s eyes blinked open, and she felt his words vibrate from his chest. “I want you for more than a day.”