None of this makes sense. Dominic gave no impression that Alison was fabricating stories about him in any way, and surely he would have mentioned that when he was telling me the things she had done. It’s one thing to accuse your partner of abuse, but quite another to claim they may have killed someone.
‘So do you understand now?’ Alison says, snapping me back to the present. ‘Why I said I don’t think Zach killed himself?’ She’s using his name as if she knows him and it turns me cold.
‘No, actually, I don’t. Yes, it seems there’s a picture of Josie Carpenter on Dominic’s computer, but what’s that got to do with Zach’s death?’
Alison moves her phone back. ‘Okay, I know what you mean. This doesn’t exactly prove anything, but don’t you think it’s strange that he has a photo of the girl your husband is thought to have killed? Taken on the day she disappeared?’
‘Yes, I admit there’s no easy explanation.’
‘Think about it, Mia. Dominic has never told the police that he knew Josie, and they definitely questioned all the staff at the uni. Why would he keep that from them?’
She’s right, there doesn’t seem to be an obvious explanation. But I tell her I still don’t see how this proves Zach didn’t kill himself.
‘That’s why I need your help, Mia. I really think Dominic is responsible for whatever happened to Josie. And to Zach.’
Silence, heavy and claustrophobic, fills the room, swirling around me as I take in this huge bombshell Alison’s just dropped. I need to clarify exactly what she is telling me. ‘You think Dominic killed Josie? And then – what? Killed Zach too?’
There are tears in her eyes and she shakes her head. ‘I don’t know, Mia. I… I think he might have. I know how it sounds. Like some film or something, but… but I really think this is what happened, Mia.’
I stand up, unable to bear my body being still, and pace the room. ‘But why? Why would Dominic do that? This is crazy.’
Alison remains in her chair but swivels round to face me. ‘I only know a couple of things for sure, Mia. My partner is a violent man. And if he can hurt me like he does, then what else is he capable of?’
‘If he’s a violent man,’ I say. I don’t mean these words to come from my mouth but it’s too late now.
She stares at me with huge wide eyes. ‘What do you mean by that?’
I can’t tell her Dominic came to see me or that I have doubts about her honesty, but this issue needs to be addressed.
‘You don’t believe me, do you? Anything I’ve said?’ She grabs her phone from the desk and begins searching for something on it. How is this the same timid woman who walked into my office moments ago? ‘Here, look at this.’
This time the pictures I’m looking at are all self-taken photos of Alison, battered and bruised, her skin a grotesque rainbow of black, purple and red. In one of them her eyes are so inflated they can barely open.
She decides I’ve seen enough and pulls her phone away. ‘Now tell me this: do you still think I’m lying?’
I shake my head. ‘Why haven’t you gone to the police? You’ve got clear evidence here that he’s abusing you.’
‘I’m sure I told you this last time – there’s no point reporting him. He’ll come after me. He’ll find me, and then what? I’ll just end up like Josie.’
‘Then why did you come here, Alison? What help can I possibly give you?’
‘I’m here because I need to find proof that Dominic is responsible for killing at least two people: Josie Carpenter and probably your husband. So this involves you too, doesn’t it? I thought you would want to know the truth.’
My legs buckle beneath me and it’s a struggle to remain upright. Seconds tick by before I can compose my thoughts. She’s right, of course: I need to know the truth. ‘Okay,’ I say, ‘even if Dominic did harm that girl, that doesn’t mean he had anything to do with Zach’s death, does it?’
Alison stands now and walks across to me. ‘Mia, do you really believe your husband would take his own life?’
‘He was desperate,’ I say. ‘He… whatever happened with Josie, he couldn’t deal with it. So he…’ I struggle to say the words. ‘Her blood was everywhere and he was dead in her flat.’
The silence again. Somehow it’s worse than the horrific words I’m being forced to say.
Alison takes my arm. ‘All I know is that Dominic is tied up in this somehow. I know it like I know the sun is shining outside right now. But the police won’t take that picture as proof, and even if it did make them listen it would never be enough to convict him of anything. I need to find more to go to them with.’
I want to scream at her but I force myself to stay calm. ‘But that’s not your job, Alison. Or mine. And even if Dominic is guilty of anything, he won’t exactly have a signed confession lying around for you to find, will he? This isn’t TV, Alison, it’s real life.’ Real life, which can be far worse than any film or TV programme.
She nods. ‘You’re right. But sooner or later the guilty always slip up.’
I don’t answer but start pacing again.
‘Okay,’ Alison cuts into the silence. ‘I was hoping I wouldn’t have to tell you this, but I can see you need more convincing.’
My head snaps up and I stare at this woman who may or may not be a delusional liar.
‘I was there that night. I… saw your husband. And I spoke to him.’
Chapter Sixteen
Josie
* * *
Zach is avoiding me. It’s been days since he dropped me off at the police station, and I haven’t heard a thing from him. It’s fine that he hasn’t texted – perhaps he feels weird doing that, and he did tell me he was giving me his number for emergencies – but in his lectures he acts as if I’m invisible. As if no hint of anything has passed between us.
But I won’t contact him again. I don’t force myself on people; if they don’t want to be around me then that’s their call, but some kind of explanation would be nice. So that’s why I’m standing outside his empty office, hoping to catch him, clutching my course module guide to my chest so it looks like I need to speak to him about an assignment.
Alison walks past, staring at the floor, pretending she hasn’t noticed me, even though our shoulders touch as she brushes past me. I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve seen her at university, so it’s weird that she’s here now.
I watch her head down the corridor and am surprised to feel a glimmer of sadness. Perhaps we could have been friends, if only she’d given me a chance. Or I’d given her one.
I haven’t given any thought to how long I’ll wait for Zach, but I’ve checked his timetable and he has no lectures until 3 p.m. so I have an hour left to hope he turns up.
I sense him before I see him, coming from behind me. I know it’s him before he appears and reaches for his door handle, barely acknowledging that I’m standing right here. But there is a faint flicker of a smile – he’s not that evil that he would completely ignore me.
‘Zach, hey! Can we talk?’
He immediately looks uncomfortable, or more uncomfortable than he did already, and flicks his wrist to look at his watch. ‘Hi, Josie. Um, I don’t have long. Someone’s coming for a tutorial in ten minutes.’
But I won’t be fobbed off. ‘That’s okay, this won’t take that long.’
He notices the course guide in my hand and his shoulders drop slightly. ‘Sure, come in.’ Maybe he’s just remembered that he’s still my lecturer.
For some reason, despite it being about two degrees outside, the window’s open in his office and it feels like a fridge in here. I give an involuntary shiver and wrap my too-thin and too-short coat tighter around me. ‘What happened?’ I say, as soon as the door clicks shut.
‘Have a seat, Josie.’ He gestures to the chair I’ve sat in several times before, never once feeling the way I do now. Out of sync with everything, like nothing is right.
‘Okay, I think I owe you an apology,’ he says, once I’ve sat down. ‘I know I promised I’d wait until you came out of the police station and I’m so sorry about leaving, but… Well, the truth is I have no excuse. I just had to go. Again, I’m sorry. I hope it went okay.’