“I cried because of what I had done to myself and to Jake. I have no coping skills Luke. Anytime something bad happened in my life, Jake was there to brush it under the rug. He was my rock and he made it so simple for me to never have to feel anything. It was like everything bad didn’t matter and I never had to face any of it. He’s not here to wash away my troubles anymore and I’m forced to deal with how I’m feeling. I think that’s why I started taking the pills because they made me forget how broken and damaged my life was. Anyway…” She let out a heavy breath. “When you told me what happened between us I was ashamed. I felt like I dishonored Jake and everyone else who’s been so good to me, including you. That night didn’t mean anything, it was a mistake, like you said, but it never should have happened and it happened because of me. I’m sorry you’ve had to live with that secret by yourself.”
He swallowed the lump in his throat and soaked in her words. He cleared his throat and found his voice. “Sounds like you’re making a lot of progress.” He said proudly before he sighed. “There’s no need for apologies Cara. It was a mistake.” He croaked. “Everyone makes them from time to time. We both made one that night, not just you.” He couldn’t let her take on all the guilt when he felt exactly the same way about dishonoring his brother. The only difference was as much as he hated himself for tarnishing his bond with his brother, he was pulled to Cara and for some reason that night felt like anything but a mistake.
“Still friends?” She asked hopefully.
Christ, she was killing him and she didn’t even know it. “We’re still friends.” He confirmed.
“Okay, well then there is just one more thing…” She said as she bit down on her lip nervously. “You can say no. I completely understand. I know you’re busy and probably won’t have the time, but… One of my steps is to make amends with the people that have been affected by my addiction and so…”
“Cara, Cara…” He said trying to interrupt her ramble. “Just ask.” He said softly.
“Will you come up here this Saturday for one of my sessions?” She asked quickly before she lost her nerve and began to ramble again.
A small smile curved on Luke’s lips. “I’ll be there.”
Chapter Seven
Luke turned off his truck and reached across the seat to grab the bouquet of flowers that he had stopped to pick up for Cara. He looked at the flowers that were all the warm colors of autumn, and hoped he made the right choice. The way his luck was going, she was probably allergic to them or she merely hated flowers. He clutched the bouquet in his hand and climbed out of his truck. He pulled up the collar of his sweater as the October chill washed over him. The leaves crunched beneath his boots as he walked towards Lakeview.
He didn’t know why, but he was nervous to see her. Maybe it was because the secret he harbored was out, and she knew what had transpired between them. She didn’t sound different on the phone the last few days, though, he countered. She’d joked with him and excitedly shared her progress with him. She usually called at night time and that was becoming his favorite part of the day. Listening to her sweet voice as she marveled over all the new discoveries she was finding about herself, made him go to sleep with a smile on his face.
He stepped inside the lobby of Lakeview and glanced around at the few people that were in the lobby. He searched for the eyes that consumed his thoughts, but couldn’t find them. He walked over to the reception area and smiled at the woman that greeted him.
“Good afternoon, I’m here to see Cara Sloane.” He half stated, half questioned. He should’ve asked her last night if he had to check in or where to go. Standing there holding the flowers in his hand, he kind of felt ridiculous, especially when the receptionist eyed the bouquet and then smiled up at him softly. He tried to meet her gaze, but he realized she wasn’t looking directly at him but behind him. Slowly he turned around and his eyes met Cara’s instantly.
He decided at that moment that he shouldn’t have agonized over the flowers, and instead he should’ve prepared himself for what he would feel when he saw her for the first time in weeks. She stood before him, her brown hair cascading in waves down around her face. Those eyes that were blank the last time he saw them, were sparkling and vibrant. Her lips were colored a soft shade of pink and curved into a smile. He swallowed hard and let his eyes travel the rest of her. She was wearing jeans that hugged her curves and he smiled because before she sought help she was thinner and her clothes baggy in places they shouldn’t be. She wore a sweater that strained against the swell of her breasts. She looked healthy and, well, she looked beautiful. He smiled widely at her.
“Cara…” He said her name in a breathless whisper.
“Hi Stranger,” she said softly. Her eyes roamed the length of him, pausing at his face and the genuine smile he had for her. She let out a small breath of relief that things didn’t seem awkward between them, in fact, they felt nice. She never really had developed a friendship with Luke in all the years that she had known him. She just thought of him as Jake’s brother and sometimes just one of the guys. The last few weeks, though they were developing a friendship, learning things about one another, they had never noticed in all those years. Her gaze fell to the bouquet of flowers he held in his hand and after staring at the arrangement of daisies, roses and peonies; she lifted her eyes back to his.