Where the Memories Lie

 

 

‘I’m not proud of it, but I couldn’t lose him. Not Lucas. He’s the love of my life. My soul mate. He’s everything to me. I couldn’t lose him to her. ’ Her shoulders stiffened. ‘But as far as I knew he never saw her again, so it was a shock when months later I was at 278

 

Where the Memories Lie

 

his house and she put a letter through his door. Lucas never knew.

 

He was in the shower and I was in the kitchen cooking dinner for us. His parents were away for the weekend so we were making the most of having their house to ourselves. I heard the letterbox go, and when I looked out the window she was going back down the path. So I opened the envelope and inside was a letter that said she had to meet him on Sunday at the barn. She knew there would be no one there on a Sunday, and it would be somewhere private they could talk. It said she had something of his and she wanted to make sure he paid for it. I thought she’d stolen something from him at first. I didn’t think she could be pregnant.’ Nadia let out an almighty sniff. ‘So I went instead of Lucas and . . .’ she trailed off, shaking her head.

 

‘Go on,’ I said stiffly, guts churning.

 

‘We were in what would be the kitchen now at the back of the house. All the doors and windows were fitted so there was no chance we could be heard from the outside, but the place was still unlocked while the other contractors were coming in to do stuff. She was obviously pretty surprised I was there and not Lucas.’ Nadia took a deep breath. Held it. ‘Everything happened in a hazy blur of anger.

 

I told her to leave him alone. She laughed at me and said it was too late for that. I noticed she had my necklace on. My necklace that Lucas had given me and she’d stolen. I tried to grab it but she darted away from me. She undid the chain and threw it at me, saying she’d let me have it back, seeing as she had something much more valuable now. I put the necklace in my pocket and asked her what the hell she was talking about. That’s when she told me she was nearly six months pregnant. She’d waited all this time to tell anyone so no one could try and talk her into getting rid of it. She said she wanted money from Lucas to support her and the baby or she was going to say he’d raped her and get him put in prison.’

 

I cupped my hands around my mouth and sucked in a breath.

 

279

 

Sibel Hodge

 

‘I told you she was a liar. I think she did it on purpose, you know – got pregnant. She wanted one of the rich boys from the village so she could use him to get away from Rose and Jack. She didn’t get anywhere with Chris so she tried it with Lucas. She used him to get herself knocked up, although obviously he didn’t need much persuading.’ She let out a laugh devoid of any humour.

 

‘She was fucking pregnant, for God’s sake! She was about to be a mother!’ I wiped the hair now sticking to my forehead away from my face and shivered involuntarily.

 

‘I wasn’t thinking straight. I was screwed up with emotion.

 

When she told me about the baby and the rape I just snapped. She was prepared to get Lucas sent to prison if he didn’t go along with her blackmail. And she didn’t give a toss about anyone she hurt in the process. So—’ She stopped abruptly. Stared at the ground, tears splashing down her cheeks, mingling with the rain.

 

‘They wouldn’t have found Lucas guilty of rape! Especially not back then, when rape convictions were rare and there was no evidence. Was that worth killing her over?’ I cried.

 

‘I just lashed out and pushed her. It was one split second!

 

I didn’t realise how hard at first, but I was raging with anger and jealousy. She fell backwards and hit her head on a pile of quarry tiles.’

 

‘Oh, no.’ I closed my eyes and tried not to picture it, but an image of the scene flew into my head. I sucked in lungfuls of air, my head spinning.