Where the Memories Lie

 

I rubbed my hands over my face and took a deep breath, trying to mentally prepare myself for what was to come. True to his word, Chris was on my doorstep in two minutes. He looked like he’d aged even more since I’d last seen him on the front step. Mind you, we probably all did. His five o’clock shadow was about a week’s shadow, but it was his eyes that really got to me. Vacant and blank, as if he’d checked out weeks ago. Or maybe he was still drunk. Or stoned.

 

‘Chris, don’t you think you should stop drinking? It’s not going to solve anything. It’s not going to bring her or Tom back.’

 

251

 

Sibel Hodge

 

He shook his head. ‘Don’t tell me what to do, Liv. Don’t tell me how I should feel or act.’

 

I held my hands up in mock surrender. ‘OK, OK. You’re an adult. I’m just worried about you, that’s all.’

 

‘It’s not me you need to be worried about.’

 

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

 

‘Nothing.’ He sighed. ‘What did you want to see me about? I’ve got a building site I need to be at soon.’

 

I held my hand out, the necklace resting in my palm. ‘Was this the necklace you saw Katie wearing the day she disappeared?’

 

He took it and held it up so the sun moved on the chain, the star swinging beneath it. ‘It looks like it, yeah. Where the hell did you get it from?’ His eyes narrowed, dark and turbulent under pale lashes.

 

‘I found it. I . . . I can’t say where until I know for certain what’s going on.’

 

A hand went to his hip and he shook his head. ‘Tell me, Liv.

 

Where? Where did you find it? Didn’t the police take it when they . . . ?’ He looked over my head, focusing on the air above me.

 

‘Wasn’t it buried with her?’

 

‘No, apparently not. So whoever had it must’ve killed her, mustn’t they? I mean, why would they have the necklace of a dead woman otherwise? The last thing she was seen wearing.’

 

‘Where, Liv?’ His voice hardened and something seemed to click in his brain. ‘Ethan said you’d picked up Dad’s things. It was in there, wasn’t it? Was it hidden in that stupid bloody magic box of his? Tell me!’

 

I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out.

 

He took a step towards me, one fist clenching at his side. ‘I told you Dad had done it. How could he? How could he kill someone I loved?’

 

252

 

Where the Memories Lie For a moment I felt scared, threatened, as his emotions seemed to ooze through every pore. Fury, hurt, guilt, something else I couldn’t quite put a name to.

 

I took a step back.

 

‘I’m not going to hurt you! What’s the matter with you?’

 

‘Nothing, I . . .’

 

He opened my hand and placed the necklace back in my palm.

 

Then he turned on his heel and stomped back down the path.

 

I watched him get into his pick-up truck as fear and revulsion did a slow dance in my stomach.

 

It all made sense now. In his confusion from the Alzheimer’s, Tom had confessed to a secret he’d been keeping for twenty-five years. And when the police came to question him about the body buried under his barn, maybe Tom would’ve been able to tell the truth and give all the details of exactly what had happened. But then he’d suddenly committed suicide while out with Ethan. How convenient for Katie’s killer. Ethan had insisted on being the only one to take Tom to Durdle Door that day, and we only had his word that Tom actually threw himself off the cliff. What if he’d been pushed? Had Ethan killed Tom, too, to shut him up because he was about to spill everything?

 

And just look how Ethan had acted through this whole thing.

 

He’d been defensive, angry and obstructive the whole way. I mean, I knew he was in mourning, but still, he’d gone way overboard trying to prove Tom didn’t have anything to do with it when you couldn’t deny that he must’ve known something.