Her actions and her comfort with me show me that she meant what she said last night about giving us a chance. She isn’t holding back. If I had to guess, she feels the need just like I do to be as close as possible.
“His name’s Earl and he’s my sweet baby. He eats too much, hogs the bed, and sometimes snores, but I love him. He’s just curious about the big man in his space.” The smile in her tone relaxes me completely and I lean back into her. She drops her hand from the cat and wraps it above her other arm, holding me to her tightly.
“You named your cat Earl?”
Her soft giggles tickle my cheek. “What can I say? I was going through a Dixie Chicks stage.”
I turn my head so that I can see her face. My arms going around her spread legs to wrap them around my body. I’m completely surrounded by her. We’re so close that I have to remind myself not to rush this and fuck her right here on the couch. “You do know what that song is about, right?” I joke, rubbing my hands up and down her smooth-as-fuck legs.
Her face lights up with silent laughter. “Yeah. Well, you can thank your sister for that one. She thought it was a great way to remind me that men are stupid or something like that.”
I can’t help it. I laugh, loudly, when I think about my sister helping to name a cat after a man named Earl that did some shitty things to women and ended up being murdered by those same chicks. “Is that so?” I ask, the smile present in my tone. “Well, if it’s all right with you, darlin’, I’m goin’ to have to ask that you leave black-eyed peas off the menu indefinitely.”
Those eyes of hers are bright and happy. Her lips pull in for just a second before she loses her ability to keep a straight face. I watch, spellbound, as she throws her head back and laughs. Her wavy hair, no longer bound by the braids she had in last night, moves with her as she continues to giggle.
God, she looks beautiful.
“What time do you need to be in at the bakery?” I ask, having to clear the lump of emotion from my throat before I speak. It’s way too early to be telling this girl I love her, even if I want to, but fuck if it almost doesn’t just come out. I guess, considering I’ve felt that way for her my whole life, it shouldn’t be too soon, but now isn’t the time.
“Jana’s got it covered today. I called her twenty minutes ago and asked if she would mind opening by herself and closin’ down after lunch. I . . . uh, I thought maybe . . . well, I thought maybe I should stay home today.”
“Hey,” I say softly when she looks away. She looks back at me, clearly feeling some sort of embarrassment. “What’s going through your mind?”
She shrugs. “It feels silly now. I didn’t even ask if you had plans today.”
“So ask me, darlin’. I know I haven’t got the best leg to stand on here, but I want you to be able to tell me what you want without worryin’ I’m going to shoot it—you—down.”
Silence ticks around us while I wait for her to speak. “I, well . . . I just thought we could spend some time together today. I should have asked you first before assuming that you weren’t busy. You probably are. Busy, I mean.”
It takes me a second, but I shift our bodies so that she’s still straddling my body between her legs, only this time she’s sitting in my lap. Her legs folded on the couch, spread wide around my body. Her ass resting midthigh. After guiding her arms up and around my neck, I place mine on her hips, then I pull her forward so that her center is right above the hard ridge of my cock. I couldn’t have stopped the deep rumble of pleasure that vibrates from my chest if I’d tried.
Her eyes widen and her fingers push around my neck into the curly hair that is way past needing a cut. I feel her give a little tug, whether it’s subconscious or not, and I vow right then and there that I won’t cut my hair again until I feel her do that while I’ve got my head between her legs. Just the thought of her using her hold on my hair to keep my head where she wants it makes me feel like I might come right then and there.
“Let’s get something straight right now, sweetheart.” My voice is thick with gravity while I speak, but in the position she’s in, I have her full attention. “If you want to spend the day with me, all you gotta do is tell me. If I’m busy, I’ll do what I can to change that. If I can’t, I’ll do my best to free myself up as early as I can. All I have to offer you is my word, which isn’t something I give without thought, but I’m giving that to you now, Leighton. I’ve never broken my word once in my life, darlin’. We’re both findin’ our way here, but we will do that together and without holdin’ back. We’ve lost too much time already because of my bullshit . . . so yes, in answer to your question, I think spending today together sounds real damn good.”
“Okay, Mav,” she responds, her cheeks pink and her breath coming in harsh pants.
“I’ve got some stuff I want to talk to you about anyway, but I would rather do that after you’ve gotten dressed and I’m not fightin’ myself not to fuck you right here on the couch in front of this big cat/beast that I’m not entirely convinced hasn’t been fuckin’ sizin’ me up for his next meal.”
She giggles.
I take a playful swat at her delicious bottom. “Go get dressed, darlin’. We’ll grab somethin’ to eat and then I’ve got some stuff I want to discuss with you.”
“That sounds serious,” she hesitantly says, the lighthearted expression on her face clearing.
“Hey,” I whisper. “None of that. Shit!” She jumps in my lap when my voice rises. “Sorry. I’m tellin’ you this, and I really want you to understand what I’m sayin’. I’m goin’ to do whatever it takes so that I never see that fear in your eyes again. Yeah, I have somethin’ serious I want to talk to you about, but I promise you it’s not anything that will cause this heart harm. Trust me to take care of it and you.”
“Okay, Maverick. I trust you.” Her words are so soft that I almost can’t hear them.
“Not completely, but you will.”
Her fingers tighten again, tugging on my hair. The tiny bit of fear I had seen cross over her expression clears. She looks at me now with the love I hope to hear her one day confess to me, completely open and unguarded. She allows me to drink in my fill of what she’s showing me before closing the distance and pressing her lips to mine. The touch is brief, but no less intimate.
“I trust you, Maverick, but that doesn’t mean I’m not scared. I’m working on it, but it’s going to take a little more than one night for me to be able to stop worrying that this is all just some dream that I’m going to wake up from only to find you gone again. I just need some time to let myself believe you’re really here and offering me everything I ever wanted.”
I nod, pressing our lips back together. “That’s all I’m askin’ for, but I’m tellin’ you right now that if this is a dream that we’re ever going to wake up from—no matter what, I’m still goin’ to be right here, right where I belong. Where I’ve always belonged.”
19
LEIGHTON
“Next Boyfriend” by Lauren Alaina