“Don’t look so scared. You know what I mean.”
“No, I mean, yes.” My heart fluttered. “Oh, I remembered running. I did. It’s something I used to do.”
“You remembered it, like right now?”
Reaching through the air, I found my way to the chair and sat. As I ran my hands over the vinyl cushion, I smiled. I had been right about the material. “No, it wasn’t right now. It was one of the first days after I woke. I don’t remember exactly. It was before I was supposed to talk, and I was feeling stressed out. I didn’t know where I was or even who I was. I felt like I was going to explode, but I couldn’t. I didn’t have a valve to release the pressure. Do you know what I mean?” I paused for her to respond. When she didn’t, I giggled. “Hey, I’m not seeing head shakes, so I’d appreciate some verbal clues to know you’re still there.”
Elizabeth laughed. “Oh, sorry. I’m definitely here. So how did that make you remember running?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I was thinking about ways to calm down, to release some stress, and it just came to me. I remembered running through a woods. There were tall trees and a meadow.” I pressed my lips together, trying to recall. “I don’t know. There was sunlight streaming down in beams through the leaves.” I shrugged again. “That’s about it.”
“Wow, not a lot of sunlight this time of year. Must have been summer. So, did you remember anything else, anything before your accident?”
I shook my head.
“That’s not fair; you didn’t give me a verbal clue.”
“No, I guess it isn’t. But I’d take seeing over being able to shake my head any day.”
“Hopefully, you’ll be able to do both soon.”
I sighed. “I hope so.”
“So, any other memories?”
“Not really. The good news is that things are becoming more familiar.” I smiled as big as I could. “And more comfortable. Like I recognized your voice and smiling doesn’t hurt my face. My side still hurts, but the headaches aren’t as frequent.”
“That’s wonderful, and you’re walking!” Her tone became more serious. “If you do remember anything else, be sure to tell Brother Jacob. I’m sure he was happy you had one memory.”
I found a string on my robe and tugged.
“Sara?”
I didn’t respond.
“You did tell him about remembering running, didn’t you?”
“No, um, I guess I’d forgotten about it, until you mentioned it. Besides, I’m sure he has other things to think about than a few random memories.”
Elizabeth moved closer and touched my knee. Judging from the direction from which her voice came, she was bending or kneeling down on the floor. “A few random? You only said running.”
“Yes, only running and the woods and sunshine. It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Are you taking your medicine?”
“Of course, I don’t have much choice. I don’t even know what I’m taking. Each morning either Jacob or Raquel hands me a cup with pills and I swallow them. I wanted to ask.” I leaned back and sighed. “But I can’t.”
“No, you can’t. You also can’t keep secrets from Brother Jacob. If I didn’t tell Luke something . . . well, let’s just say I’d remember to tell him the next time.”
My muscles tightened. “I wasn’t hiding this from Jacob. I just forgot.”
“Then tell him that. Since you weren’t able to speak when you had the memory, he should go easy on you.” She patted my knee. “Hey, enough about that. Have you been listening to the recordings?”
I nodded, still thinking about Jacob. Would he really be upset over something so trivial? Things were going well. I was doing better with not questioning, yet asking. It wasn’t easy. I wasn’t sure if at one time I had been naturally inquisitive or if it was because I was trying to remember so much. Either way, questioning came too easily. Usually, once I’d start to question, I’d catch myself.