And that confused him all to hell.
“Border is back in town,” Jake began.
Maya blinked at him slowly. “I got that part.”
“He’s back because he wants this to be his home.”
Her eyes widened then. “You mean he wants to move in here permanently?”
He shook his head. “No, I don’t think so anyway. I mean he wants to make Denver home. He’s staying here because I told him to while he figures out the next step. Only I think the next step is more than just what house he’s going to choose.”
Maya reached out for him then pulled away. He didn’t like seeing her so uncertain, so unlike the Maya he knew. It was his fault, of course. He was slowly changing the game, and yet not letting her in on the change itself.
“He told me why he left, the whole of it. How he was afraid his dad was going to kill me because of what we were to each other.” He paused. “Though I don’t think even we knew at the time what we were to each other.”
Maya let out a breath and moved forward then. She put her hands on his arms and looked into his eyes. “And what were you to each other?”
“I loved him, Maya,” he said softly. He’d always been honest with her about everything but what he’d truly felt for her when he’d seen her at Montgomery Ink for the first time. He wouldn’t lie about this, not when it seemed so important. This was one of those moments where it could, and would, change everything. It couldn’t be based on lies. Jake knew that much.
Maya pressed her lips together.
“And he loved me,” he added softly. “And we threw it all away because we were young and afraid to admit what we felt.” And here he was, years older, and still so freaking afraid.
Maya didn’t say anything, but her mere presence helped him continue. She always did that for him. No matter what he felt, he was always safe with her. He couldn’t push that away, couldn’t lose that. And if he held on tight enough, he wouldn’t lose it, no matter what happened next.
He let out a breath. “So, we talked about that, and then we blamed each other for it like idiots, and I hit him.”
“Sounds about right,” Maya said wryly. “And did he hit you back?”
Jake shook his head. “No, though he should have. I sort of sucker punched him. But he just took it like he deserved it or something. He might have once, but I don’t think he did now. I hit him not because he’d left, but because he came back and said things I didn’t want to deal with.”
Maya took his hand and slid her thumb over his red knuckles. “What else did he say?”
“That I wanted him still,” Jake said softly. “That he wants me.” He paused. “That I want you.”
Maya’s gaze shot up, and she stopped breathing. “What?”
Jake’s heart raced, and he looked down at the woman who had been by his side for as long as he could remember. She was the one who filled him with hope, laughter, and the pain he had when he couldn’t have her.
She was everything.
And maybe Border was, too.
Instead of thinking about what that could mean. He used his free hand to cup her face and lowered his lips to hers. She gasped into his mouth, and he pressed harder, needing her taste, needing her. This was what he’d been missing, what he’d needed in his life. Years of being her friend, of wanting nothing more than that because she made him happy and he made her feel the same was worth it washed away. The hunger from that night in the bar roared back, hitting him right in the gut. He wanted her. Needed her, and would do anything to keep her.
It felt right.
It was right.
Maya let him kiss her for a few moments before pulling back.
The punch to the jaw shouldn’t have surprised him, but it did.
“What the hell, Jake?” Maya yelled. “You can’t just kiss me like that. You can’t just change things like that.” She took two steps back and raised her chin. “We’re friends. Or did you forget that?”
“I didn’t forget anything, Maya. How could I? But we both want this to change.”
Maya snorted. “Oh, so you’re reading my mind now? Tell me what I’m thinking about now.” She glared. and Jake shook his head.
“You want to hit me again.”
Maya sneered. “Lucky guess.”
Jake tried to get his breathing under control. It wasn’t easy when her lips were all swollen and wet from his kiss and her eyes held that heat he had seen the first night he’d met her.
“We want things to change, Maya. I do. I know you do, too.”
“Stop telling me what I want.” Maya closed her eyes and inhaled through her nose.