“Young lady, you need to take better care of yourself. Not just to make sure your growing baby is getting all the healthy nutrients that it needs, but also to keep you strong and healthy.” My cheeks redden under the chastisement I just received as the doctor turns toward the tablet in his hand and starts typing. “I want you to stay in the hospital for tonight, just to keep an eye on you. If all is well tomorrow, I’ll release you in the afternoon…if, and only if, you have somewhere to go where you will be looked after because I want you off your feet for a few days.”
“That won’t be a problem,” Lucien speaks for the first time since the doctor walked into the room. “She’s going to be moving in with me so I’ll make sure she gets plenty of rest and is well looked after.”
I am?
The doctor nods, a hint of mischief in his eyes, “That’s a wonderful idea. I’ll leave you to get some rest, and I’ll be back to check on you in the morning, but if you need me before then ask one of the nurses to call me.”
“We will. Thank you doctor,” Lucien says, shaking his hand.
I’m still too stunned to say anything as the doctor leaves. I knew my life was about to change when I confessed to Lucien that I was pregnant with his baby, but I had no idea I’d be moving in with him. I guess it was a foregone conclusion really. No matter what he thinks about how his life should be lived at the end of the day Lucien is very much a family man. I guess I’ve taken his decision to stay away from me before I hurt him out of his hands. I just hope he doesn’t hate me for it because I couldn’t live with his hate. That would destroy me.
“You’re quiet,” Lucien observes.
He has his head dipped slightly, his hands in his pockets as he watches me from beneath hooded eyes. I’ve seen him like this before and it’s his way of trying to defend himself against something he isn’t going to like. Is he expecting an argument from me? My refusal to move in with him?
Although I’d love to be moving in with him under different circumstances, I’m not going to turn this opportunity down. If we’re together so much, it will give me the opportunity to prove to him that I want to be with him and that his scars don’t bother me.
“Sabrina, please. We need to talk before you get it into your head that you don’t need any help and you refuse to move in with me. I want you there damn it.” He paces the floor in front of the hospital bed.
My silence is obviously killing him, which isn’t my intention.
“Lucien, I’m not sure what is going on inside that head of yours, but I’m willing to do whatever the doctor says to make sure we have a healthy baby.” I place my hand over my stomach and caress where I imagine the baby is lying now. Lucien follows my actions like a starving man.
“Can you feel,” he pauses, “the baby?”
“Not yet.”
Disappointment flickers in his eyes.
“It’s too soon, but my stomach feels harder to the touch.” I hold my hand out to him. He hesitates for a few seconds before he comes back and sits besides my hip on the bed, placing his hand into mine.
Tingles of pleasure shoot through my body at his touch. I drop my head and look at my stomach in hope that he doesn’t notice the blush running rampant on my face.
His hand tightens in mine, which is a reminder that I’m holding his. With a nervous smile, I shove the covers past my stomach and lift the hospital gown so that he can feel my stomach properly.
The bedding pools in my lap as I bring his hand and place it against my stomach.
He inhales.
Our eyes meet.
His eyes move to my stomach in wonder as he starts to caress over my skin where his baby is growing. My heart feels so damn heavy in my chest as I watch him.
He really has no idea how handsome he is. He only has to walk into a room and my panties practically melt away when I look at him. Not only is he sexy, but he is so damn lovable. I only have to watch him with his family and see how much he loves them for my heart to fall deeper for him. Yes, I want to be the woman who gets to keep him—to love, honour and cherish him. I’m just not sure that it’s going to work out for us. I know he desires me, and perhaps cares for me, but not in the way that I want him to. Not in the way that I care for him—love him, even.
“Our baby, Sabrina,” he whispers. “I can’t believe…I never thought…” He clears his throat. “I don’t just want you to move in with me. I want you to marry me before our baby arrives. I want you to have the McKenzie name.”
I stare at him thinking he’s saying one thing, but I’m dreaming he’s saying something else. “What? I’m not sure I follow. You pushed me away. You hurt me more than anyone ever has. I’ll move in with you while I’m pregnant, and I promise you will always have access to your son or daughter, but I’m not sure I want that kind of commitment from you when I know that isn’t what you want. When I know you’re only here with me because of the baby, and not because you want to be with me.”
My heart tightens like a fist is squeezing it but I push down the pain…the longing. I’m not ready to jump into marriage with him because of the baby I’m carrying. I want him to realize that he can’t live without me. I want him to propose to me because he loves me. A girl can dream.