I asked the driver if he could just drive around the law school grounds, keeping my fingers crossed that I would find him. I guess luck was on my side that evening because after only fifteen minutes of searching, there he was, stepping out of his car. I ordered the driver to stop, throwing cash in his lap and rushing out the door before the vehicle had come to a complete stop. Drawing attention to myself because Damien instantly glanced in my direction as I shut the door behind me.
I hadn’t seen him in weeks. He looked older, tired, but still handsome as ever. His hair was tied up in a bun high on his head. His facial hair grew longer, only adding to his dangerous allure. Though it was his innocent face that let him get away with whatever the hell he was involved in for Emilio. I assumed no one ever saw him coming, until it was too late. His muscular frame appeared bigger, stockier, more dominant; it loomed over my small build as I made my way over to him.
“Hey,” I greeted, not knowing what else to say.
My mind suddenly drew a blank from his authoritative and commanding presence hovering above me. He was so tall compared to my five-feet-four figure, feeling every bit of his six-feet-four stature. I wanted to hug him, embrace him, something other than this abrupt welcome like two strangers meeting for the first time. He didn’t move, obviously not reciprocating my same sentiment, even though it was my birthday.
A day he always celebrated with me.
“What are you doing here, Amira?” he callously questioned which shouldn’t have surprised me, but it did.
“Do you know what today is?”
“Yes.”
My heart sped up, and I warily smiled at him.
“It’s Wednesday, and I have a criminal law class in five minutes, and your unannounced little visit is going to make me run late for it.”
I winced, but he didn’t even bat an eye. “It’s my birthday, Damien,” I informed, waiting for I don’t know what.
“To me it’s just another day for you to want something. So what the fuck can I do for you now?”
“You could stop being a fucking asshole!” I snapped, probably giving him exactly what he wanted, but I didn’t care anymore. If he wanted me to speak my mind and tell him what I wanted, then I was going to do precisely that. “One year! Three hundred and sixty-five days and I don’t know how many hours because I can’t do math that quickly. But you already know that! And it would’ve made you laugh, if you hadn’t permanently wedged a stick so far up your ass I’m surprised you can even walk still! All you do is throw low fucking blows at me!”
In one stride, he was in my face. “Don’t you ever cuss or raise your tone to me again,” he steadily ordered. “Do you understand me?”
I blinked, smiling. Knowing exactly what I was about to say. Standing on the tips of my toes to try to get as close to his face as I could, I spewed, “Fuck. You!”
He leaned in closer, an inch away from my lips. My mind started racing, mimicking my rapidly beating heart. I thought he was going to kiss me, so when he murmured, “You’re damn lucky we’re on school grounds because if we were anywhere else in public, I wouldn’t think twice about taking you over my knee and teaching you a thing or two about some fucking manners.”
I didn’t know what was worse, that he didn’t kiss me or that I wanted him to do exactly what he just threatened.
“Now, turn your ass around and go fucking home, Amira. Nothing good happens to little girls who are out this late at night.”
He meant it as a dig, but it backfired on him without him even realizing it. Damien wanted me to go because he was still protective over me, and as soon as he recognized what he did, he blinked, shoving it all away. I swallowed hard, resisting the urge to kiss him again. Not caring what might happen after this time. It couldn’t get any worse.
Oh, how wrong I was…
“You asked me what you could do for me today, right?”
He narrowed his eyes at me, taking in my words.
“I want you to call me Mu?eca. You haven’t called me that in so long.” I licked my lips, baiting him. His stare followed the movement of my tongue. “Then I want you to kiss me and prove to me that you don’t still feel this connection that’s always been between us.”
He subtly grinned. “Look at you, Amira. Making demands. It’s really fucking cute, actually. I’d gladly oblige just to prove you wrong, but I don’t think my girlfriend would appreciate that.”
My head flew back, stepping away from him. “Your girlfriend? Since when do you have a girlfriend?”
“Since I wanted to get my dick sucked on a regular basis. We’re done here.” He gave me a curt nod. “Go home.” With that, he turned and left.
Leaving me there speechless, feeling as though the ground was crawling up my legs and eating me whole. I went home, empty and alone. Avoiding Mama Rosa at all costs. She knew. I never told her what had happened with Damien. It was clear as day. I think part of her hated him for it as much as I did.
I laid in my bed, staring at my ceiling for I don’t know how long. Repeating the last thing he said to me in my head. Contemplating if he was just lying to me so I would go and stay away from him. I peered around my room, taking in every gift he’d ever gotten me throughout the years. My eyes stopped when they reached an open space on the shelf of dolls. For some reason it made me angry, not seeing Yuly among them. Missing the one thing he didn’t provide for me.
I got out of bed, slipping on a hoodie and my shoes. Quietly opening my door so I wouldn’t wake Mama Rosa. Deciding that I wanted to get Yuly now, he didn’t deserve her anymore. I made it out of the house with no problem, hailing another cab over to his apartment. I was grateful I still had his key, hoping he didn’t change the locks on me. Especially since he knew why I had taken it from Mama Rosa in the first place. At this point, nothing would surprise me, though.
We pulled up just outside his door around eleven o’clock at night. Only reminding me of the last time I was here this late. I stepped out hearing a blend of loud music surrounding the complex, thinking someone was having one hell of a party. As soon as I unlocked his door, the music became a little louder. Suddenly realizing its origin was coming from his room. My feet moved on their own accord, having no control over the movement of my limbs. Each calculated step pulled me closer to his bedroom, to his bed, to the girlfriend he was touching, kissing, and making love to.
When it was always supposed to be me.