Barbarian Box Set: Barbarians of Zandipor Books One, Two and Three

He moves like a Samurai, dipping and spinning with his swords, never getting touched by the enemy’s weapons as he cuts off limbs and plunges his swords into their bodies.

“What’s going on?” Avery asks, too scared to peek over the rock that she’s hiding behind. Normally I would be hiding beside her but I know what I’m capable of now. I killed aliens and although I’m not going to rush into battle with them, I can at least help Tin Tom out. He’s still laying on the ground with smoke pouring off of his metallic body.

“I’m going to go pull Tin Tom to safety,” I say to Rolanda who’s firing arrows at the swarming aliens.

“Okay,” she says as she releases an arrow that lands in one of the green alien’s chest. He falls to the ground, dead. “I’ll cover you!”

“I’ll stay here!” Avery calls out from behind the rock.

My heart is pounding and the adrenaline rushing through my veins is making me feel invincible again. With a quick little prayer, I sprint across the grass to get to the robot.

Most of the little green aliens are dead but Emperor Rsordan is still gaining some ground in the fight. He rolls on top of Turic, straddling his stomach, and lands punch after punch on the big man’s face.

Rolanda aims for him but every arrow that she shoots just harmlessly bounces off of his armor.

“Ahhhh!” Straykeer hollers as he runs and jumps at the emperor. He kicks him with both feet and the huge alien flies off of Turic and crashes to the ground. Straykeer leaps over Turic, bringing his swords down on the emperor in a fury of slices and hacks, but all they manage to do is create sparks as they bounce off of the impenetrable armor.

I drop to my knees where Tin Tom landed in the brown bushes. Most of his lights are burnt and his electrical parts are sparking and short circuiting. I don’t know if there’s anything that I can do for him but I have to try. He lied to his master to save our lives.

“Tin Tom,” I say, touching him quickly with my finger. His metal is so hot and I yank my hand back when I get a little shock. “Are you okay?”

“Top of the morning to ya,” he says, sounding like a leprechaun as smoke comes off of his body in light wisps. “Tom is just a wee bit knackered, lassy.”

“What can I do, Tin Tom?” I ask, looking over his fried body. I don’t think that there’s anything I can do.

“Tom is as fit as a fiddle and as hard as nails,” he says in his new very thick Irish accent. “I just be needing a pint of the black stuff.”

“Oil?” I ask, looking at the ship. Maybe they have some inside.

“No,” he answers as a spark flies off of his electrical panel. “Guinness!”

“Okay,” I say, rolling my eyes. He’s even more annoying than he was before, if that’s possible.

I turn back to the fight and Turic, Pontuck, and Straykeer are circling around Emperor Rsordan. He’s swinging his electrified staff in the air like the rotary blade of a helicopter, daring one of them to come forward.

I glance back at Rolanda who’s biting her nails as she watches nervously. She’s all out of arrows.

I’m really wishing that I could help out when I look back at Tin Tom and notice the brown leaves that he’s lying on. They look remarkably like the trabaca leaves that sent me bad tripping to hell.

It’s a bad idea but it’s the only one that I have. I drop to my knees and start ripping off some of the brown leaves. I can tell from the smell that they are definitely trabaca leaves. I’ll remember that horrible smell for the rest of my life.

“Where’s me pot of gold?” Tin Tom asks, blabbing on as he twitches with sparks flying off of him.

Straykeer rushes forward but the Emperor Rsordan is fast. He swings his staff down, smashing it into Straykeer’s shoulder.

He drops to a knee and grunts as the purple electricity flows down his back.

“No,” I gasp when I see his face cringing in pain. I have to do something.

Turic rushes the emperor as I quickly gather some of the trabaca leaves and break them into pieces. Poor Turic gets the staff in his chest and the big guy goes down.

I rip off a long yellow leaf of a nearby bush and quickly roll up the trabaca leaves inside. This is probably a horrible idea but it’s all that I got.

Pontuck is all out of arrows but that doesn’t stop him. He pulls out a bone dagger and attacks the emperor with agility and speed, but it’s not enough. Emperor Rsordan spins and smashes the staff into his ribs, dropping the poor blueberry warrior to the dirt.

I shove my hand into my pocket, looking for my lighter but it’s gone. Shit!

Just as I drop my shoulders in despair, a flame catches on Tin Tom’s smoking body. I quickly light my trabaca leaf joint and then toss some dirt onto the robot to quench the flames.

Kim Fox & Juno Wells's books