Chapter Eighteen
Drake
I lost twelve hours. My entire body felt like it was on fire as I sat up in bed and surveyed my hotel room. I groaned as I took in the destruction I had caused the night before; my credit card was going to be maxed out by the time they charged me for all the damages.
Last night had been the worst trip of my life. I had found a dealer at the bar we were playing at, and he offered me a deal on LSD after I bought more cocaine. Of course my dumbass had bought it.
The band didn’t have another show for a couple of days and we all decided to crash at a hotel for once instead of trying to sleep in a cramped bunk. I made some lame ass excuse about being tired when we checked in and locked myself in my room. I had used acid once or twice before and thought I could handle it, but what followed after I stuck that little piece of paper under my tongue was the worst trip of my life.
It had started out fine, but after a couple hours, things started to change. As I watched the swirling colors of the bedspread, Chloe and Jordan popped into my head. They were standing by the pool, locked in a passionate embrace. That one image set me off, and I literally saw the air around me start crackling with my energy.
The pale red walls changed to the color of blood and started dripping onto the floor. I had grabbed a towel from the bathroom and tried to wipe the blood up, but there was too much. The towel was saturated with blood and my hands were covered in it. I wiped them on my jeans and my shirt until they were red as well, but my hands wouldn’t come clean.
I ran to the bathroom and jumped into the shower after I stripped my blood soaked clothes off. There was a bar of soap on the side of the tub and I grabbed it. I scrubbed my skin furiously as the water around me turned red. I panicked as the water pouring over me turned red as well. I dropped to my knees in the tub and closed my eyes.
“It’s not real. It’s not real. It’s. Not. Real.” I chanted.
When I opened my eyes, the red water had disappeared, along with the blood that had covered my body. I breathed a sigh of relief as I shut the water off and grabbed the extra towel from the hook. I wrapped it around my waist as I stumbled back into my room and sat down on the bed. My relief was short-lived as I noticed the walls were still covered in blood. I was in one of those hotel rooms that was expensive enough that nothing was bolted down, so I grabbed the lamp beside me and threw it at the wall.
The sound of it shattering as it hit the wall echoed over and over in my head until I felt like my ears were bleeding. I reached up and felt for blood, surprised when there was none.
After that, things had gotten crazy, and judging by the room in shambles around me, I didn’t remember most of it. Besides the shattered lamp, I had managed to damage most of the room. The mini-fridge door was lying on the floor; I had somehow managed to tear it from its hinges. The hairdryer from the bathroom was on the bed beside me, with the cord missing.
I scratched my head, trying to figure out how I’d managed that one. The nightstand drawer was on the floor, broken into pieces and the curtains had been ripped from the window and shredded. There were other things scattered around the floor, but I didn’t even bother to look at them.
I glanced at the clock on the nightstand that had somehow survived my assault on the room and groaned. It was pushing two o’clock and I knew everyone else had to be back on the bus by now. I had no clue as to why they hadn’t stopped by to get me up on their way out.
I stood slowly, making sure that everything was in working order. When I didn’t find my legs broke, I sighed in relief. I put on a pair of jeans and a shirt before walking into the bathroom and collecting my clothes from the night before. I groaned as I noticed that I had somehow smashed the mirror above the sink.
I could almost hear my credit card crying in my wallet as I threw my dirty clothes in my bag and walked out the door. The woman at the front desk eyed me closely as she handed me my receipt. I was used to the unwanted attention, but after last night, I wasn’t in the mood to deal with it.
“When you manage to put your tongue back in your mouth, you might want to send someone up to clean my room. And yeah, I know I’ll be billed for damages.” I bit out.
Her mouth dropped open and I couldn’t help but laugh as I turned and walked out the front doors. The hotel was only a couple blocks away from where we had left the bus parked in the bar parking lot. The summer heat had me sweating before I’d even made it a block and I regretted not just throwing on a wife beater and shorts. My hair was plastered to my forehead by the time I made it back to the bus.
The guys were sitting at the table playing cards, but Jade was nowhere to been seen when I entered the bus. Both of them turned to look as I climbed aboard.
“I have a question for you,” Adam said.
“What?” I asked as I stifled a yawn.
“Why do you even have a cell phone?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Um, so I can call people. And so that Chloe can send me naked pictures. Why?”
“I don’t see how either of those things matter, since you never bother to take it with you or keep it on if you do,” he pulled my phone from his pocket and held it up, “I could have looked at every picture on here, naked Chloe included.”
I walked to the table and snatched it out of his hand. “But since you like your face the way it is now, I know you didn’t.”
He chuckled. “No, I didn’t. But if I didn’t like Chloe so much I probably would have.
“Jade kept trying to call you until I noticed your phone plugged in by your bunk. After that, she got kind of pissy.”
“Why? You guys knew where I was.”
“We beat on your door for a good ten minutes this morning. There was no answer so we assumed you had already left. Chloe called Jade when we got back here and that’s when we realized we lost you again.” Eric said.
“Not that we told Chloe that, she’d kill us.” Adam murmured.
“Wait, Chloe called Jade? When?” I asked.
Eric and Adam glanced between each other. “This morning, right after we got back to the bus. She was worried because she couldn’t reach you.”
I cursed, hating the fact that I had made Chloe worry. I had been in too much of a hurry last night, trying to get away from everyone, to remember my phone. I was more worried about my damn drugs than I was about Chloe.
“Did she say what she wanted?” I asked.
Instantly, I knew something was wrong as Adam looked away. “Just call her.”
“Tell me what’s wrong first.” I shouted.
Adam glanced at Eric. “You do it. I suck at this shit.”
Eric and I watched as Adam made a hasty exit off the bus before I turned to look at Eric. “Well?”
He sighed. “Chloe called this morning because she couldn’t reach you. I guess she tried since early last night. She finally was worried enough to call Jade to check on you. By that time, we realized we had lost you again, but we didn’t want to worry Chloe, so we told her you were still back at the hotel sleeping.”
“Ok, but why did Adam just make a quick escape?”
“You’re going to be mad at yourself when I tell you.”
“I’m already mad at myself for making her worry, just tell me damn it!”
“She won’t be coming back today; her mother killed herself. She’s really upset, but Danny is taking care of everything for her, and Logan and Amber made it to the house late last night. She’s not alone, but she needs you there.”
I cursed and kicked the seat beside me. Pain shot through my foot, but I ignored it. I had been off getting high, while she was alone with both Logan and Jordan. I had left her alone with both of the a*sholes while she was completely vulnerable; I might as well have tied a bow around her too. And her mother? What the hell had happened there?
“Where’s Jade?” I asked.
“Out looking for you. She’s been gone a while though, so she should be back anytime.”
“I hope so, we need to go. Like now.”
Eric spoke, but I had suddenly turned deaf as I watched the walls of the bus tilt and whirl. I shook my head, trying to clear it, and they slowly moved back into place.
That was the thing I hated most about LSD. While I might not be high on it any longer, it would randomly pop back into my life for weeks after I had taken it.
I felt slightly dizzy as I dropped into the seat next to me.
Eric looked at me with concern, “You all right?”
“Fine, just dizzy.” I said as I closed my eyes and waited for it to pass.
My eyes flew open as the bus door banged against the wall. I blinked several times as Jade came running up the steps.
“Oh thank God. If I had to tell Chloe we lost you again, she might have never forgiven me!” She said as she hugged me tightly.
Adam walked in behind her and closed the door. “Told you he was in here,” he gave me a pointed look, “Damn crazy woman.”
I laughed as Jade pulled away. “Yeah, I’m here. Now can we get on the road?”
Eric walked to the front and sat down in the driver’s seat. “Sure, now go call Chloe.”
I jumped up from my seat and walked to my bunk, dialing her number as I went. She answered on the first ring.
“Drake? Oh thank God! I was freaking out!” She yelled into the phone.
I pulled my phone away from my ear as I winced. “Ouch, yes I’m here. I’m so sorry baby, I left my phone in the bus to charge and forgot to grab it before we went to the hotel.”
“It’s all right. I just thought something had happened to you.”
“Don’t worry about me, are you ok?” I asked.
She was silent for a minute before answering. “Did Jade tell you?”
“Yeah. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. We’re on our way back now.”
“The whole band?” She asked, sounding surprised.
“Well yeah. They all want to be there for you and besides, how else would I be getting there? You want me to walk the whole way?”
“Oh, right. Duh. Sorry, my mind isn’t working right now.” She said as she laughed at herself.
“It’s fine. We’re in Northern Pennsylvania right now, so it’ll be a few hours before we get there.”
“Hold on a second,” she said as I heard voices in the background, “Ok, I’ll be down in a minute.”
I waited impatiently, hoping that it wasn’t Logan or Jordan that she was talking to.
“Sorry, I’m back. Jordan said Danny needs to talk to me, so I have to go. Call me when you’re almost here.”
“All right, love you.” I said unhappily. No matter what either of them said, I wasn’t happy with Jordan being around her, especially now that she was hurting and vulnerable.
“Love you too,” she said as she hung up on me.
I sighed and threw my phone on the pillow beside me. Now I played the waiting game, stuck on this damn bus while Chloe needed me. I felt my anger at the entire situation boiling over, and I punched the side of the bus.
Adam appeared beside me and leaned down to look into my bunk. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing, I’m just stuck on this f*cking bus while Jordan and Logan take care of Chloe for me, that’s all.” I said as I kicked the bus this time. I hoped that if I left a dent, they didn’t notice and take it out of my deposit when I took it back.
“Dude, take a chill pill. Chloe’s a good girl, she won’t do anything behind your back. Hell, I’m not even dating her and I trust her.” He scratched his head with a baffled look on his face, surprised by his own admission.
I couldn’t help but laugh at his surprise. “Are you crushing on my girl Adam?”
“Nah, but if she’s ever up for a threesome, let me know.”
I glared as I punched his leg.
“Shit, I was just kidding!” He jumped back, out of my range.
“Anyway, it’s not Chloe I’m worried about. It’s Jordan and Logan; they both hate me and want in her pants. That makes for a bad situation waiting to happen.”
“Amber is there with her isn’t she?” He asked.
“Yeah, why?”
“Because she will watch out for her. That girl can bust some balls when she needs to.” His gaze turned thoughtful as he thought about Amber, “I wonder if she wants to hook up while I’m around. With all your shit lately, it’s been too long since I got laid.”
I rolled my eyes. Amber and Adam had been hooking up way before Chloe and I had gotten together, and she was the only girl I knew who was a repeat for him. I never asked, but I was sure there was something else going on between those two besides just sex. Adam would deny it of course; the guy was worse with commitment than I was.
“You’ll have to take that up with her.”
“Oh I will, not that I think she’d turn me down. I mean, come on, she’s had me before. She knows what she’s been missing since I left.”
“Just don’t piss her off alright? That makes it rough on Chloe and me.”
“Whatever. Amber’s not the clingy type so I don’t think you have to worry about that.” He said as he turned and walked away.
Despite what he said, I was worried. If they ended up hating each other, it would put Chloe right in the middle since she was with me and I came as a package deal; you get me and the band follows too.
My thoughts drifted back to Logan and Jordan and I clenched my teeth in anger. If either of them touched her, I’d kill them. I lifted my hand to run it through my hair and it brushed the side of my pants. I had a fresh bag of cocaine and an itch I needed to scratch. It would be just the thing to take the edge off.
I rose from my bed and slipped into the bathroom. I pulled the bag from my pocket and grabbed the mirror and dollar bill from their hiding place under the sink. Not that they would be much evidence, but I had made sure to hide them away from anything the band used often.
I set them on the counter and made two lines across the surface of the mirror before putting the bag back in my pocket. After rolling the dollar, I leaned down and snorted both lines quickly, my eyes watering. I wiped the mirror clean and stuffed back under the sink with the dollar, before sitting on the floor and leaning back against the sink.
I was just starting to feel the effects when the door swung open and Eric walked in. I cursed myself for not locking the door as he caught sight of me, sitting on the floor with my eyes bloodshot and red. We both were frozen as we started at each other.
“Are… Are you all right?” He asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just needed to be alone.” I answered lamely.
“You know you could have done that in your bunk right? Why are your eyes red? Have you been crying?” He asked.
“What? No, I just had something in them and came in here to flush them out. Who’s driving?”
“Jade took over for me. Anything you want to talk about? You know I’m not here to judge.” He asked, undeterred.
I mentally groaned. If he figured out what I was doing, he would tell everyone else and it would be blown out of proportion. They would tell Chloe too, and it would all be over.
“Nope, I’m fine. Like I said, just something in my eye.”
He watched me closely as I stood and walked past him out of the door. I breathed a sigh of relief when he walked into the bathroom and shut the door behind him. Crisis averted. As long as no one found out I was using again, everything would be fine.
I sat down at the table with Adam and watched as the miles disappeared below the bus. I felt light and even a bit happy from the cocaine and with every mile that passed, my heart began to lighten. I would be with Chloe soon and everything would be all right.
Eric came back from the bathroom and took over for Jade. She came back and sat down with us, a deck of cards in her hand.
“Who wants to give me some money?” She asked cheerfully.
I groaned and laid my head on the table. I was running through money a lot faster than I wanted to think about and I couldn’t afford to lose another hundred bucks to our resident card shark.
“Not today, I’m going to owe you a house by the time summer is over with.” I said.
“Me either, you cheat!” Adam said from beside me.
She pouted. “I do not cheat, you two just suck at cards. Eric too.”
“I heard that!” Eric yelled from the front.
“Fine, we won’t bet actual money, we’ll just play for fun. Deal?”
I looked at Adam who shrugged his shoulders. “Sure, why not?”
Jade smiled widely as she dealt us both in. Adam and I spent the next couple hours having our asses handed to us by her in poker. I had never seen someone who was so good at cards before.
“You should go to Vegas and play. You’d probably make more money that way than being in a band.” I grumbled.
She laughed. “What would be the fun in that when I have you guys here to murder?”
Adam threw his cards on the table. “I’m out, damn it!”
I threw mine down as well. “Jade wins. Again.”
I glanced out the window and grinned as I realized that we were only about twenty minutes from Chloe. I stood and all but ran to grab my phone off my pillow. I dialed her number, excitedly bouncing back and forth as I waited for her to pick up.
“Hello?”
Jordan. Any happiness I felt left me as I heard him answer her phone.
“Where’s Chloe?” I bit out.
“She’s sleeping, why?” He asked in a too calm voice.
“I’m almost there and I wanted to let her know.”
“Hold on a sec, let me see if I can wake her up.”
I heard him set the phone down. “Chloe. Hey Chloe Bear, wake up,” he whispered.
I heard her groan and I almost threw my phone across the bus. He was there with her while she was sleeping. A few seconds later, he picked the phone back up.
“I can’t get her to wake up. I’ll try again in a couple minutes, I’ll make sure she’s up by the time you get here.”
“Are you in bed with her?” I asked, using my own deadly quiet voice.
All noise on the bus ceased as Jade and Adam listened in.
Jordan was silent for a minute before answering. “I am, but it’s not what you think.”
“Then what the f*ck is it? This is the second time I know of that you’ve been in bed with her!” I shouted, not caring who heard me.
“Calm down, she was having a nightmare when I came in to check on her. I laid down with her to help calm her down. She was asking for you, but since you weren’t here I had to do your job. Again.”
“Well isn’t that convenient for you. And what the f*ck is that supposed to mean; doing my job again?” I asked as I heard the blood pounding through my veins.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about. You’ve been off playing band while I’ve been here taking care of her. I just wish she’d open her eyes and realize that she’s wasting her time with you.”
“She isn’t wasting her time with me, I love her and she f*cking knows that! If she had told me what was going on, I would have been there in a heartbeat. She told me to stay away.”
“Then maybe she realizes that I’m more than capable of taking care of her.”
“What happened to that truce you tried to call in the parking lot? I knew it was bullshit then and look, I was right. All this time, you’ve wanted her.”
“Of course I want her! You’re with her, so I don’t have to tell you how amazing she is, inside and out. I’d be stupid not to want her!”
He kept his voice low as he spoke, and I knew he was trying not to wake her.
“Is she aware of this?”
“Yeah, she is. Of course she shot me down for you.” He sounded bitter and I smiled.
“Good to know, she’ll be thrilled when I let her in on this little conversation.”
“F*ck you a*shole, I’ll deny it. Tell her and I’ll just use it as more ammo against you.”
I knew he was right; Chloe had been patient with me, but she knew I hated her spending time with him. She would think it was just another way I was trying to keep her from him.
“He doesn’t have to tell me, I heard everything.” Chloe said, a bit muffled through the phone.
My heart leapt and I laughed like an idiot. “F*ck yes!” I shouted as I fist pumped, “Give Chloe the phone!”
Jordan didn’t say a word as I heard him pass Chloe the phone.
“Drake?” Chloe asked.
“Who else, unless you have another boyfriend he’s trying to steal you away from?” I asked sarcastically.
“Funny. Where are you?”
I glanced out of the window. “About ten minutes away.”
“I’ll call the guard station and let them know it’s ok to let you through this time. I need to go, but I’ll meet you out front.”
I smiled as I dropped my phone into my pocket. I had no doubt Chloe was ripping into Jordan right about now. Too bad that I was too far away to hear any of it.