Southern Beauty

chapter 27


ere is one ticket to Southampton, England,” the clerk handed Johanna a ticket. “Sailing alone?”

“Yes,” she confirmed her worst fear, “I am alone,”

“You should be able to catch a train to Paris once you get there,” he smiled.

“Yes, thank you,” she tried to smile without tearing up again. She needed to be brave.

“I can understand why you would want to leave this country,” the clerk said, “you never know who is Union or Confederate, you can’t trust anyone nowadays.”

“No kidding,” said Johanna as she held the ticket in her hand the weight of it seemed a lot heavier than it actually was. She walked toward the door. Her head felt as if it was in a dream, a very sad and lonely dream. Her heart continued to deaden with each beat. She stepped outside to get some air to clear her thoughts and there before her stood David.

Her astonishment kept her from speaking and she stood in silence staring at him. He did not change his expression for one whole minute to Johanna it felt like forever. His manner did not make her feel at ease.

David had no idea he sat in silence that long. His breath was caught in his throat along with his words.

“Are you going somewhere?” He asked her in almost a whisper stepping closer to her so they were face-to-face.

“I am,” was all she could say.

“Yes, you are going to Harrisburg with me,” he said with authority.

“I am not,’ Johanna felt angry at him barking orders at her. “Who do you think you are? I am not your Southern whore, Mr. McPherson.”

“No,” he smiled. “You are my Southern Beauty, and I…” he swallowed, “am madly and hopelessly in love with you, and I know, God willing it will all work out. You just have to have a little faith.”

She stared at him. She wasn’t expecting him to say this. She thought for a moment she must be dreaming or she must have finally gone mad. She didn’t know what to say. Could this work out? She didn’t know anymore. She had been waiting for the day that he finally expressed his love, but now that he did, she wondered how many people would be hurt by it. She eyed him with uncertainty. She didn’t know even if she could believe him. Did he want something from her? She couldn’t go through more heartache another betrayal.

“Did you hear me?” he grabbed her shoulders and held her up close to him, trying to make her understand. “I said that I love you,” He felt desperate to get through to her.

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” she still felt afraid to let go. Could she trust him?

“Just say it. Why won’t you finally admit it to me, to yourself?” he asked.

“Say what pray tell,” she asked as if she didn’t know what he was talking about, still guarding her heart.

“That you are in love me. That you can’t live another day separated from me. That instead of logic, you followed your heart, you chose me,” he said.

Johanna continued to hold her ground and stay guarded. Her mind raced. She couldn’t open her mouth. She was frozen in fear.

“I see,” David’s eyes began to tear and he let go of the hold he had on her. “Then I guess there is nothing more to say,” he tipped his hat toward her with a slight bow of his head and he walked away.

What had she done? What was she thinking? This is what she dreamed about, what she had been praying for. He was all she had ever wanted. She loved him with her whole being. How could she ever let him go or give him up? She stood there not knowing what to do. She watched him walk out of her life without even looking back at her, not even once. He couldn’t do that to her. Not after all they had been through. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and opened her shielded heart in faith.

“How dare you walk away from me, Mr. McPherson!” she yelled angrier at him for giving up so easily in defeat. “How dare you walk away from the woman you love?”

He continued to walk on as if he wasn’t listening, she bit her lip. “How dare you walk away from the woman who loves you?”

David turned and stared her down. He thought how beautiful she looked so vulnerable, yet hands on her hips as if she was in control scolding him. She had finally said it. She had finally stopped trying to convince herself that she didn’t love him. She stood her ground unsure what he was going to do.

“Pardon, I didn’t hear you,” said David cupping his hand to his ear. “What did you say?”

Johanna’s faced flushed and tears began to fill her emerald eyes but she said it anyway, “I said,” she hesitated, “I love you.”

“Well, then,” David smiled relieved his tactic actually worked on her stubborn self. He then ran to her and picked her up in his arms and kissed her like he never kissed her before.