I had none. You wanna hear how last night I discovered you cheated on me with Dawn Taylor?
I exhaled, frustrated that I didn’t know where to go with all of this. I’d literally had no one I trusted to share this with. Even talking to Pastor Edmondson was out of the question. I certainly wasn’t prepared to deal with it at this point. I’d much preferred focusing all of my energies on the show.
Azmir relented. He attempted a cease fire. “Sweetheart, I’m so sorry. These assholes are trying to get over on us and it’s costing me flight and other accommodations to get my attorneys down here on a Saturday to let them know that the shit ain’t going down. I’m not even sure how long this will take or if it will run into my Miami trip next week. I’ll make it up to you, I swear.”
A tear slipped from my swollen eyes.
“Azmir, I’m good. Go, take care of business. I’ll be fine.” When I heard how dry that slipped, I buffered it by saying, “I need to wake up and head over to Adrian’s.”
“Are you sure you’re okay? I wouldn’t be offended if you were disappointed—”
“No. I’m fine,” I cut him off, rushing out my words in a quick breath. I couldn’t manage much more. I was about to break.
“Have a great show, Brimm. I’ll be home as soon as I can,” Azmir murmured apologetically.
My heart sunk at his words. They were filled with so much sorrow and promise, but it may have been too late. He had betrayed me.
~~~~~~~~~~
My heart was racing and my mouth had gone dry. I was on stage, behind the curtain, waiting for my music cue. There was no announcement of names at this type of show, guests had to follow the program to know who was performing. I’d gone to the bathroom for the fourth time before curtain call, so my nervous bladder had no excuse.
The auditorium was quiet as the audience was anticipating the performances as well. I heard the bass drop and in that moment all anxiety had left my body and the memory of my muscles took over.
“I know you don’t usually hear me talk like this…but I got a little game that I wanna play…”
I’d invited my guests in for a show.
And suddenly no one was in the room, but me and the music. Every word that Tamia belted radiated from my core. I demonstrated it from top of my head to heels of my feet. My twirls, figure-eight hip sways, leaps, jumps, and flips were all perfectly timed and executed with true passion; passion that I’d experienced time and time again with Azmir.
“So, come and get it…get it…I’m so excited I can’t hide my feelings…get it!”
I gave Azmir total control of my person because of things he commanded from it. The way he brought out a sensual side of me that I didn’t know existed. How he made my body do things and answer to him in ways I’d never dreamt possible. It amazed me how he knew crevices and soft spots and sensitive locations and could summons responses to his skilled acts of lovemaking. I could never get enough of that. I didn’t want to lose that.
Tamia’s voice was strong and my male background dancers, who made cameos throughout the performance, were virile and well-coordinated.
Azmir somehow appeared in my mind and suddenly, he and I were there alone. I had become aroused. I adlibbed, “Close the door! I want you! I need you, baby.”
I extended my arms to the floor, inches away from my feet, pushed my hips and swung my body a few yards the way I did when Azmir caught me practicing in my room a few months back. He loved that move and showed me just how much right then and there. It caused me to push harder in my performance. I was one with the music, so much so that I could swear that I’d felt a quickening deep in my canal.