“We talked about this before I bought the bar; that’s why I discussed it with you first, and now you’re behaving like this. Why, Lily? Are you trying to hurt me? You knew the first few months were going to be difficult.”
“Yeah, but then the first few months turn into another few months, and then they turn into years. It’s your passion, and that’s all you’ll ever do, and that’s all you’ll ever think about, Johnny!” I screamed.
The expression on his face nearly killed me; it was filled with pain, disgust, and anguish. As he walked to the door, and put his hand on the knob, he turned around and looked at me.
“I’m not your father, Lily.”
He slammed the door behind him, and I stood there with my hand over my mouth as I dropped to my knees. I couldn’t believe I called him “Johnny.” As I closed my eyes, the memories of my mother and father fighting became more vivid. Brynn and I would sit on the stairs and listen to them scream back and forth at each other. I remembered my mother yelling at him about never being around and how he promised things would be better. I began to sob as I buried my face in my hands. I felt two arms wrap themselves around me, and I heard Sam’s voice telling me that it was going to be ok. He helped me up from the floor, and he led me to the couch.
“Lily, please calm down.”
“Sam, I said horrible things to him. I called him ‘Johnny.’ I’m more fucked up than I thought I was.”
35
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Luke
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As I hopped on my bike and sped out of the parking lot, I couldn’t stop thinking about Lily’s behavior and her attitude towards me. She was being irrational, and I was disturbed by the fact that she called me her father. We’d had a long discussion about how many hours I’d be working at the bar the first few months, and she told me that she understood and that she’d be with me and support me through it all. As I pulled into the parking lot at the bar, I parked my bike on the side of the building and walked through the doors. I sighed as I stepped behind the bar and poured myself a cold beer.
“Where’d you run off to?” Maddie asked as she was making drinks.
“Lily’s apartment.”
“You didn’t bring her back with you?”
“No, we got into a fight.”
Maddie stopped what she was doing and looked at me. “About what?”
“The bar, and how she’s sick of not seeing me, and spending time with her,” I said as I slammed the glass down on the counter and looked at her. “See, this is what I don’t get: we spend time together, and we see each other every day. She comes here, and when I leave, I go home to her place, and I spend every night with her.”
“You have to realize that things for Lily have significantly changed over the past couple of weeks. She lost her teaching job, and her boyfriend, who spent every waking minute with her, became the owner of a bar, so she barely sees him anymore. That’s a lot to take in at the same time.”
“She called me ‘Johnny,’” I said.
“What? Why did she do that?” Maddie asked in confusion.
“I don’t know. All she said was that this will consume me because it’s my passion and dream.”
As I looked down, Maddie walked closer to me and put her hand on mine. “It sounds like she’s having flashbacks of her father and how he was never around. Didn’t she say that her ex-fiancé was never around either and started spending less time with her?”
I nodded my head and clenched my jaw. “You’re right. Now things are starting to make sense.”
“You need to talk to her, Luke. I love you both, and I don’t want to see your relationship go in the toilet because of a misunderstanding. “
“I’m going to talk to her, don’t worry. I’ll be leaving after I finish the budget. I want to give her time to cool down.”
Pulling my phone from my pocket, I swiped the screen and saw that I had a text message Sam.
“I just left Lily’s, and she’s a mess, man. I know it’s none of my business, but I’m not sure if I’ve ever seen a girl like that. She’s pretty messed up, and if you love her, you’ll get your ass back there.”
“Thanks for being there for her. I’m heading over there now.”
I looked at my watch and walked to my office. I shut down the computer and stacked the paperwork into a neat pile for tomorrow. I walked over to Maddie before leaving the bar.
“Starting tomorrow, I want you out of here by 5:00 p.m. You’ve been here late, and I appreciate it, but it’s not fair to Charley. I know it’s only temporary, but things are going back to normal. We need to sit down tomorrow and have a meeting, so head here right after dropping Charley off at school tomorrow,” I said as I kissed her on the cheek.
***
When I opened the door to Lily’s apartment and stepped inside, I didn’t see her. I walked down the hall, stopped in the doorway of her bedroom, and stared at her lying on the bed all curled up. My heart broke seeing her like that. She must have heard me, because she rolled over and tried to open her swollen eyes. As I walked over to her and sat on the edge of the bed, I pushed her hair behind her ear and leaned over, kissing her teary eye and moist cheek. She raised her arm up and looped it around my neck, bringing me closer as I buried my face deep into her.
“I’m so sorry for everything I said.” She began to cry.
“I’m sorry for not being here for you when you needed me, Lily.”
We lay there for a few moments in silence before I pulled back and looked at her. Her eyes were swollen and red. As I got up from the bed, she grabbed my hand, and I told her that I’d be right back. I walked to the bathroom and grabbed a washcloth from under the sink. I ran the cloth under the warm water and folded it as I walked back to the bedroom. Gently wiping her face, the corners of her mouth turned up, forming a small smile.
“That’s what I like to see.” I smiled back.