If You Only Knew

Chapter Eight



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WELL, THAT WAS a side of Ty she’d never seen before. What was his problem anyway? And he accused her of not being herself. Maybe the stress of his reunion   with Andre had been greater than he let on. Sure, he cared about her. Rayna knew that, but could his strange behavior have anything to do with wanting to find Bree? The truth of the matter was, she didn’t know as much about Ty as she’d thought she did. One thing she was sure of, though. She didn’t deserve his anger and disdain, and she certainly didn’t need him going all Neanderthal on her. This mess wasn’t her fault. It was his. The sooner they got where they were going and Joe picked her up, the better.

She threw the bundle down on the bed and sorted through her new clothes. Jeans, socks, a sports bra—no lifting and separating for her—a royal blue V-neck pullover, canvas slip-on shoes and… what the…? A thong?

A chuckle escaped in spite of her irritation. Tough-guy Nate foraging through the underwear display to pick out her thong was something she’d have given anything to have seen.

Her lounge pants and tank top hit the floor as she hurried to change. She washed her face, brushed her teeth, and used her fingers to comb through her unruly curls. Her few articles of clothing went into a pile on top of her ripped and torn black dress, and she tied the ends together to form a neat bundle. With a minute and a half to spare, she threw open the door to Ty’s room and let it bounce against the wall.

Both men jumped to their feet at the loud crash but stopped short staring at her.

She looked down at herself. “What? Am I still not dressed appropriately?” Her innocent smile rested lightly on Ty’s face.

Her gaze slipped to Nate, and she was sure he reddened before he coughed, grabbed his bag, and headed for the door.

“I’ll meet you in the parking lot.” He avoided her eyes as he brushed by and left the room.

Ty watched his friend’s hasty retreat before swinging back to her. His face was a mask of regret as he walked toward her and reached for her arm.

She should forgive him. After all, he’d come all this way to help her. That spoke volumes about the man he was, but what kind of a woman did he take her for? Did he honestly think she purposely teased men to see their reactions?

She’d get to it, but she wasn’t quite ready to stop being mad yet. Bristling, she pulled away.

“Wait a minute. I’m trying to apologize… again. I was a jerk. I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

The sincerity in his voice almost destroyed her resolve, but she tensed as his hand skimmed her arm, and she twisted out of his reach.

“Don’t touch me, and don’t call me that.”

Rayna scooted through the doorway and hurried down the hall to the elevator. To her dismay, Ty caught the door just as it started to slide closed and stepped in beside her. The confined space was thick with tension as they rode to the first floor in silence. She nearly shot out as soon as the doors opened.

Nate had checked them out and was already behind the wheel of the car out front. Ty caught up and opened the rear door for her. She ignored him and climbed in the front opposite Nate, then busied herself with her seat belt.

Ty snorted and said something under his breath before the car groaned under his weight as he slid into the backseat.

Nate pulled on to the street and handed a map over his shoulder to Ty. “See what you can find off the beaten path.”

Ty unfolded the map and studied it for a few minutes. “We’ll take Highway 299 to the coast and turn north. Andre won’t expect us to be sightseeing. We’ll cross into Oregon on 101, then head for Portland and let that backup you mentioned run interference. If we drive straight through, we should make your uncle’s house by dark. It’ll be a long day, but I want Rayna on that chopper as soon as Joe arrives tomorrow.”

Apparently, Ty didn’t want anything getting in the way of her catching that ride. Did that mean he wasn’t willing to give her the second chance she’d asked for? He’d already said he wasn’t going back to Montana, so if that was where he was sending her, where did that leave them? For a moment, heartache threatened to overwhelm her until she remembered she’d done it to herself. She’d been the one to leave. No sense getting all melancholy now because he’d taken her seriously and made his own plans for the rest of his life. That was what she’d said she wanted.

She hadn’t expected him to pack up and leave Montana, though. The only home he’d known for several years and the place where she selfishly thought he’d always be—waiting for her. Damn, she really was selfish.

She felt Nate’s gaze on her and glanced toward him. “Thanks for picking up the clothes.”

“No problem. I have three sisters, so I’ve had a little experience in that department.” He winked and a grin softened his worried expression.

“Oh really? Do your sisters all wear thongs?”

Nate coughed as Ty lobbed a series of mumbled expletives from the backseat. She tried, but Rayna couldn’t stop the belly laugh that finally broke free, and Nate soon joined in with a hearty guffaw. Rayna didn’t glance back at Ty, sure there was a stern look of disapproval on his face, so she was surprised when he spoke with amusement in his tone.

“Am I going to have to separate you two?”

Nate cleared his throat and pasted a repentant expression on his face. “No, Dad. We’ll be good.”

Rayna cracked up again, this time glancing toward the backseat. Ty shook his head. Relief washed over her, and she puzzled the reason for it. Her world had gone off-kilter the moment Ty became angry with her, and now, for some reason she didn’t fully understand, it was back on track again. That her well-being was tied to him terrified her, especially since she didn’t currently know if their futures would follow the same path. For right now, though, they’d broken the heavy tension in the car and maybe they wouldn’t have to drive five hundred miles in silence. It was a place to start.


“How are your sisters?” Ty refolded the map and leaned back against the seat.

“They’re good. Susie is pregnant again.” Nate launched into a narrative on each sister, their marital status, how many children they had, and whether their current significant other was any good or not. Nate had an opinion on almost every aspect of his sisters’ lives and didn’t hesitate to share. Ty asked a question now and then to keep him focused, and Rayna took the opportunity to contemplate what her future held. What would Joe and Cara think when she told them she wasn’t going back to UCLA?

Joe’s wife, Cara, was like a sister to her, and Rayna missed her fiercely. Cara was giving birth to their first baby in a few weeks, and Rayna didn’t like the idea of being so far away. Now she wouldn’t have to be.

Nate drove for a couple of hours, then switched with Ty when they reached Trinidad on the coast. Rayna concentrated on the towering giants of the Redwood National Forest and occasional glimpses of the ocean on the driver’s side. The sun shone brightly through the foliage from above and lightened the heaviness of her heart.

She was so lost in her own thoughts she almost jerked her hand away when Ty covered it with his. Her subconscious registered Nate’s quiet snoring from the backseat as her gaze flew to Ty’s face.

He picked up her hand and raised it to his lips. “Did he really buy you a thong?”

She shrugged. “’Fraid so.”

One of his eyebrows rose, giving him a decidedly evil look. “Are you wearing it?”

“Why would I tell you?”

“Damn, sweetheart. It’s driving me crazy just thinking about it.” He kissed her hand again and laid it on his thigh.

Rayna tugged her hand back, but he caught it and again set it on his leg, this time leaving his hand in place to cover hers. She turned to look in his eyes.

“I need you.” His gaze held hers as he repeated her words from last night.

Her heart melted at the earnestness in his voice and the plea in his eyes. What did he mean? Did he need her for the long haul? Or long enough to get through this crisis without falling apart? The latter was much more probable, but anything was preferable to the silent tension between them.

“I did apologize, if you remember—twice.” He swept his eyes back to the road and checked the rearview mirror.

She cocked her head and nodded once. “I remember you said you were a jerk.”

He laughed and squeezed her hand. “Trust you to remember that part.”

Rayna watched him until he looked at her again. “I was over being mad before we even got in the car.”

Ty smiled and kissed the tips of her fingers again. “That’s my girl.”

A strange tingling wound through her at his soft words. “What’s going to happen now?”

“We’ll get you to that chopper and back to Joe’s compound. You’ll have to stay there for a few days until it’s safe for you to go back to LA.”

That wasn’t going to happen if she could help it. Joe would have the last word, and although it was sure to anger Ty, she’d make sure Joe heard her argument. In spite of that, going or staying wasn’t what she was worried about.

She needed to know what he was going to do—how much danger he’d be putting himself in to make sure she was safe. She couldn’t stand the thought of something happening to him. That was the reason she’d broken it off with him in the first place. Too afraid to lose him, she’d chickened out on their relationship, yet here she was still scared to death he’d leave her the way her brother had.

Tears sprang to her eyes, and she looked away quickly. “I’m not going back to LA.”

His hand tightened around hers, but he remained silent.

She finally worked up the courage to face him.

He glanced at her skeptically. “You’re letting a couple of thugs scare you off?”

“No.” That wasn’t it at all, but the words to explain escaped her. Maybe it wasn’t fair to tell him how miserable she’d been without him… how life in the big city was so far down the list of things she wanted. She longed to ask him to let someone else handle Andre and come home with her, but when she tried to speak, no words came. It definitely wouldn’t be fair to change the course of his life again. That was a decision he’d have to make… once he had all the facts.

“This will pass, Rayna. I’ll make sure you’re out of danger. Will you trust me?”

She flipped her hand over and laced her fingers with his. “Always have.”

He cocked his head slightly. “Then you’ll go back to Montana with Joe?”

She glanced away from him, afraid he would read the determination in her eyes. “Sure, if Joe thinks that’s best.”

“And you’ll show me your thong later?”

A throaty laugh escaped. His thoughts had obviously been otherwise occupied, and he didn’t really hear her reply. So much the better. “Probably not, although I might consider it… if you feed me sometime soon.”

“That I can do.”

A few minutes later, Ty pulled into the parking lot of the Crescent City Pancake House and turned off the ignition. Nate jerked awake, his hand on his holster.

Ty glanced over his shoulder, then grinned at Rayna. “Would you look at him? He’s been sleeping like a baby and probably doesn’t remember where he is, much less getting in the car at the crack of dawn.” He swept his gaze over the seat again. “Come on, partner. It’s almost nine, and the lady wants breakfast.” Ty opened his door and stepped from the car.

Nate followed, running a hand through his disheveled hair and grumbling.

Ty’s hand on her back warmed and comforted Rayna as he walked beside her to the restaurant. Inside, the aroma of bacon and eggs warred with grilled burgers and onions and made her stomach sit up and take notice. She was starving again.

Ty chose a booth about halfway back where they could see the car, the parking lot, and the front door. She scooted in first, and Ty slid in next to her with Nate taking the opposite side. A petite, middle-aged waitress brought them coffee and took their orders.

Rayna attacked the sausage, scrambled eggs, and double order of hotcakes the waitress set in front of her, ignoring Nate’s incredulous perusal and Ty’s amused grin. She finished and leaned back to enjoy her coffee, listening to the men’s conversation.

Ty caught her eye. “Last time I saw this guy he was practically a married man. How’s Val?” Ty’s gaze swept back to Nate as he swiveled his coffee cup in a circle on the table.

Nate continued eating without looking up. An uncomfortable silence lengthened before he set his fork down and stared across the table. “Val is doing well. We broke up two years ago. She decided she didn’t want to spend her life with a cop.”

A muscle in Ty’s jaw bunched, and his hand tightened around his cup. “Shit. I’m sorry, Nate.”

“I’m sorry too. That’s so unfair.” An instant of undisguised emotion on Nate’s face made it obvious to Rayna how close they’d been.

“Water under the bridge.” Nate crumpled his napkin and dropped it on the table. His fingers shook a bit when he picked up his coffee cup and took a swallow. “How about you tell me what your plan is to take care of Andre Komarov.”

Ty held his gaze and some sort of unspoken communication passed between them before he nodded and glanced away. “I plan to give Bree another chance to kill Andre and this time I’ll help her.”


“What’s to keep him from killing both of you first?”

“That’s where you come in. I’ll need some backup. Joe will want in on it, too, as soon as he gets Rayna home. He’ll bring as many men as we need—enough for a show of force. I don’t have the whole plan worked out yet, but I will when the time comes.”

“Let me help.” Rayna didn’t realize she’d said the words out loud until she heard them.

Both men stopped talking and regarded her as though she were a wayward child.

“We’ve been through this. I need to know you’re safe, and right now the only way to guarantee that is to let Joe take you home. Do it for me. Okay?”

“Ty, you know I can take care of myself. Don’t treat me like I’m helpless. You’ve never done that before. Why is this time different?” The level of her voice rose steadily.

Nate leaned across the table. “Maybe because Andre’s minions have orders to kill you on sight.”

“What?” She leaned back, an ache growing in her stomach as though she’d been punched.

“Way to go, Nate.” A frown drew Ty’s brows together.

The I’ve-said-too-much look on Nate’s face confirmed it was true and that Ty had tried to keep it from her. She glanced accusingly at him. He watched her, his head cocked slightly to one side.

“Aw, hell. I’m sorry, man.” Nate shoved from the booth and dropped some bills on the table. “Think I’ll get some air.” He strode toward the door without a backward look.

Rayna watched him go, still trying to get it straight in her head what just happened. “You want to tell me what that was about?” She’d trusted Ty. It never occurred to her he’d lie or keep her in the dark. The sense of betrayal that swamped her hurt more than his anger.

“You didn’t need to know right away. After everything you’ve been through the last couple of days, I wanted to give you some time to get back in the game before I told you.”

“You’ve known since last night when Andre called. Haven’t you? Did it occur to you I might react differently to a situation if I have all the information? Is there anything else you’re keeping from me?”

Ty shook his head.

“What gave you the right to make that call?” Rayna tried not to give in to the anger that lingered just below the surface.

He covered her hand where she gripped the edge of the table and spoke quietly. “I care about you. That gives me the right, damn it.” His voice held a vulnerability she’d never heard before.

His words tugged at her heart and made her boiling mad at the same time. The intensity with which he regarded her took the sting out of the harsh reprimand that had been on her tongue. She clenched her fists and seriously considered decking him for a few seconds, then raised one hand and swept her fingers down his cheek. Leaning close, she slid her arm around his neck and looked in his eyes.

“I get it. You want to protect me, and I appreciate that, but it goes both ways, Ty.”

His jaw stiffened the way it always did when her argument hit home. “This is different, Rayna. I won’t let him hurt you again, and the only way to make sure he doesn’t is to remove you from the playing field.”

“So, what you’re saying is, after working together and training together for over a year and completing a dozen missions side by side, you still don’t believe I can do my job.”

“That’s not true.” Ty shook his head. “Be reasonable.”

“Reasonable? What was the first thought you had when you learned Joe called Nate to help us?”

Ty averted his eyes.

“Yeah, that’s right. Joe thought you couldn’t handle it alone. That’s what you thought. Wasn’t it? How did that make you feel, Ty?”

He started to protest, then stopped and shook his head. “Hell, I should know better than to argue with you. I still think I’m right, but if you can win Joe over… I’ll learn to live with it.”

“Thanks. You won’t be sorry.” She smiled brightly.

“Nothing has been decided yet.” He scooted out of the booth and threw a few more bills on the table. “Hang out for a minute. I’ll be right back.” He headed for the men’s room.

Outside the window, Nate leaned against the side of the car, his head bowed. Rayna cringed, imagining how angry he must be with himself for dropping that tidbit of information.

She tensed as Nate straightened and glanced toward the back of the building. He jerked his gun from its holster and ran in the direction he’d looked until he disappeared from her line of sight. Rayna’s gaze darted frantically toward the men’s room, but there was no sign of Ty. Every ounce of her training told her to back Nate up. What if Andre’s thugs were out there looking for her? It wouldn’t be fair to let Nate face them alone. She kicked herself for not insisting Ty give her a gun, but an unarmed backup was often better than no backup. She slid from the booth and started toward the door.

Rayna stepped onto the sidewalk in front of the diner. “Nate?” No response. She ran the length of the building, even as the hair at the back of her neck began to tingle.

For the space of a heartbeat, she considered waiting for Ty, but as soon as she rounded the corner, it was too late. Nate lay motionless on the asphalt about fifty feet away in a small parking lot that held half a dozen cars and plenty of places to hide.

“Nate!” Rayna sprinted toward him and dropped to her knees next to him. Blood ran down his forehead from a jagged cut at his hairline. She took his gun from his hand, then searched for a pulse and exhaled slowly when she found one.

He groaned and flung a hand to his head. “Son of a…”

“What happened?” Her gaze darted between the cars, then back to his face.

His intense stare over her shoulder gave her a split second of warning before the barrel of a gun pressed against the back of her head. She rolled away and bounded to her feet, the gun leveled at her attacker, Mikhail. In spite of the sling that cradled his left arm, his gun now rested against Nate’s head and he grinned scornfully at her.

“Consider your next move carefully, Miss Dugan. Can you kill me before I pull the trigger, ending your friend’s life? If so, give it your best shot… or you can put your gun down and Detective Sanders will live.”

If she could delay long enough, until Ty came looking for them…

“Time is of the essence. It’s now… or say good-bye to the detective.” Mikhail’s finger flexed around the trigger.

Rayna lowered her gun and set it on the ground in front of her.

“Now, walk over here. Come along without a fight this time, Miss Dugan, and everything will be fine. If not… well, we would like Detective Sanders alive to give a message to your friend, Ty, but whether he is in one piece is up to you.” The man moved his handgun so she could see it pointed at Nate’s kneecap.

Rayna walked toward him. “That won’t be necessary. I’ll do whatever you want.” They’d caught up with her. That probably meant she was dead, but if she could get him away from here without hurting Nate or Ty, she’d count it as a win.

Mikhail studied her face with a scowl, then turned back to Nate. “Tell Whitlock we will see him in Portland, and he better have that FBI bitch.”

“Wait. Think it through, man. I know Ty. If you hurt her, you won’t be able to go deep enough. He’ll find you. Take me instead.” Muscled shoulders flexed when Nate spread his arms wide and grinned crookedly as though even he realized how ridiculous the idea was.


Mikhail wound his arm around her waist and jerked her roughly against his side, then slid his hand slowly down her hip. Rayna shuddered and bit her lip to keep from making things worse by ending this guy’s chances of ever having children. If Nate had named the Bobbsey Twins appropriately, the other one was around here somewhere. She couldn’t take a chance on Nate being shot when he jumped in to help her.

“Interesting, but she promises to be more fun.” Mikhail released her waist and put his arm around her shoulders. “Right, baby?”

Nate growled, rolled to his knees, and pushed off the pavement. Quicker than a man his size should have been able to move, he lunged for the Russian.

Mikhail’s gun hand swung in an arc into the side of Nate’s head. The sickening thud of impact made her nauseous, and Nate dropped in a crumpled heap.

“You bastard!” Rayna kicked the side of Mikhail’s knee and heard the snapping of bone. A violent expletive burst from his lips. She swung around, aiming her foot at his head and connected. He dropped to the ground, dazed. She hadn’t heard the large black SUV start up or leave its parking spot until it squealed to a stop beside them. It was too late to run… and anyway, she couldn’t leave Nate, so she turned to face the new threat.

Suddenly Mikhail grabbed her from behind. His one arm held both of hers pinned to her sides and he managed to open the SUV’s door with the arm in the sling. Rayna threw her head back into his face, hitting his already broken nose. He howled, and his arm loosened enough for her to land an elbow jab to his gut. He let her go and bent double, but his hand snaked out and caught her wrist as she tried to skirt by him. He straightened, jerked her arm up behind her back mercilessly, and she cried out.

He pushed her toward the open door. “Get in the car, bitch, or I will break your pretty little neck.” He lifted her up on the seat, and she sprawled facedown.

“Easy, Mikhail. Andre wants her alive… for now.” The voice from the front seat was familiar. The other man with Andre that night—the second half of the Bobbsey Twins, Boris.

As soon as Mikhail slammed her door, she sat up and tried the handle. Locked, and she couldn’t open it from the inside. Mikhail clambered into the front seat. Rayna’s gaze sought Nate, where he was just beginning to stir again as the man behind the wheel put the vehicle in gear.

Rage and panic fueled her desperation. She reached over the seat for Mikhail and slammed his head against the headrest, then slid her arm around his throat and clamped down tight. Strangled choking noises came from the man as he struggled and clawed at her arm. Nothing made it through the red haze surrounding her until Boris’s gun barrel bumped against her temple.

“Stop or I will shoot you.” His foot on the brake, Boris waited patiently for Rayna to make her decision. His make-my-day expression clearly said he didn’t care which way this went.

Reluctantly, she released her grip and sat back against the seat. Mikhail coughed and choked in the front. When he quieted and looked at her over the seat, the cold hatred in his eyes held her motionless. The blow came lightning fast, caught her in the face, and turned out the lights.