His Marriage to Remember

Six



Sitting at the desk in his office, Sam stared off into space as he tried to think of ways to turn things around with Bria before he had to tell her that the majority of his memory had returned. There were still some areas that remained a little foggy, but for the most part the dizzy spell he had experienced the night before had restored the events of the past six months—enough so for him to realize that if he didn’t do something, and damn quick, he was going to lose her.

There were some things she thought were problems in their marriage that he didn’t think were problems at all. But the only way to get her to see his side of things would be for them to work together to find a happy medium. He had already conceded that letting her do a few things for him, letting her fuss over him a little, wouldn’t be as degrading to his pride as he had once thought. And although he would love to spend more time with her, he needed to get her to see that he had to work, that making a good living for her was his purpose in life. He had tried to tell her before, but this time he had to make her see where he was coming from, had to get her to understand his side of the issue.

But working things out with her wasn’t going to happen if she divorced him and moved two hours away to live in Dallas. And it seemed that’s what she was hell-bent on doing.

Unfortunately, time wasn’t on his side. If he didn’t find some way to prove to her that she belonged with him within the next week or two, Bria would leave again, the divorce would be final and this time there wouldn’t be a second chance. This time it would be for good.

“Sam, it’s such a nice day, would you like to walk down to the creek with me?” Bria asked from the doorway.

When he looked up, his heart stalled. He didn’t even want to contemplate what his life would be like without her in it. That’s why he had to win her back as soon as possible. The way he saw it, now was as good a time as any to get started.

“Sure,” he said, smiling. He wasn’t surprised she was going back down to the creek. Sitting under that old cottonwood tree while she read a book had always been one of her favorite things to do on a lazy summer afternoon. “Are you wanting fish for supper?”

“Have you decided to disturb the catfish and his lady friend?” she asked, laughing.

“Maybe we’d better plan on having something else tonight,” he said as he turned off his computer and rose to his feet. “I’d hate to ruin their day.”

When they walked out of the house and headed down the path behind the barn to Sugar Creek, Sam reached over and took Bria’s hand in his. He loved touching her, and the thought of having that privilege taken away from him was more than he wanted to deal with. He had watched her walk out once and it had damn near killed him. He couldn’t let it happen again. But what could he do to convince her to stay with him?

He couldn’t talk to her about why she felt divorce was the only answer. That would entail letting her know that his memory had returned and once she found out about that, she would pack up and make things final. Besides, just like the first time she left, Bria would want answers about why he hadn’t rushed to her side when she had the miscarriage, and those were answers he wasn’t yet ready to give her—might never be able to give her.

No, he was going to have to show her that she belonged with him, that she was as vital to him as the air he breathed. He could tell she still cared for him or she wouldn’t be with him while he recovered from the accident, nor would she respond to him the way she did when he held her, kissed her. That was in his favor and a pretty good sign that he wasn’t going to be fighting a lost cause. Maybe spending time with her the way he was doing now was a start and if he thought about it a little more, he was certain he could think of other ways to convince her not to give up on them.

“Do you have any idea how pretty you look today in that white sundress?” he asked, bringing her hand up to his lips to kiss the back of it. Made of some kind of gauzy fabric, the light summer breeze made the full skirt flutter around her ankles and it looked almost as if she floated just above the ground. “You look like an angel—my angel.”

Clearly taken aback, she smiled and shook her head. “Thank you, but I really hadn’t given a lot of thought to the way I look.”

As she handed him the blanket to spread beneath the cottonwood tree, it bothered him that Bria was surprised he admired the way she looked. It bothered him more that he couldn’t remember the last time he had actually told her how beautiful he thought she was. He had always thought she was the prettiest woman he had ever seen and he had told her he thought she looked hot, but that wasn’t the same as paying her a genuine compliment.

“If you aren’t going to be fishing, what are you going to do while I read?” she asked, kicking off her sandals, then lowering herself to sit on the blanket.

He stretched out beside her, then propped his elbow to rest his chin in his palm as he gazed up at her. “I don’t know.” He reached over to draw an invisible heart on her palm with his index finger. When he heard her sharp intake of breath, he smiled. “Maybe I’ll take a nap or just lie here and watch you.”

“Who are you?” she asked, frowning. “The Sam Rafferty I know would rather do anything than to willingly be idle for more than five minutes.”

Taking her hand in his, he pulled her down to lie beside him. “I’ve got something to do,” he said, wrapping his arms around her. He eased her to her back, then, removing his hat, he leaned over her to brush her mouth with his. “I’m going to kiss my wife and let her know how much she makes me want her.”

Before Bria could protest, Sam settled his mouth over hers and savored the sweetness of the most desirable woman he had ever known. At first she lay perfectly still in his arms, but as he traced her soft lips with his tongue, then parted them to slip inside, she put her arms around his shoulders and melted against him.

Thoroughly exploring her soft inner recesses, he stroked her tongue with his and encouraged her to return the favor. When she accepted his invitation and did a little exploring of her own, Sam felt the familiar heat like a flash fire in his loins. No other woman had ever aroused him as fast or to the heights that Bria did. He was harder than hell and aching to join his body with hers.

Sliding his hand beneath the hem of her skirt, he caressed her knee, then skimmed his hand up her smooth thigh. He loved touching her, loved the feel of her satiny skin beneath his palms. She was his woman and all that was good in his life. That he might lose her was something he wouldn’t allow himself to consider.

When she shivered, then tangled her legs with his and pressed herself closer, Sam knew she was as turned on as he was. But as ready as he was to make love to her, she wasn’t yet ready to take that step with him. Knowing her the way he did, he knew as sure as the sun rose in the east tomorrow morning, Bria would think of her acquiescence as a moment of weakness and regret her actions, instead of viewing it as the natural act between two people who cared deeply for each other. Having her regret anything they shared together was completely unacceptable.

“I don’t tell you nearly often enough how honored I am that you’re my wife, Bria,” he said, easing away from the kiss. He nibbled tiny kisses along her soft cheek to her ear. “Or that I consider myself the luckiest man alive to have you,” he whispered.

Raising his head, he watched a small tear slip from the corner of her closed eyes to slowly slide down her temple. As he kissed it away, he hated that his words caused her to cry, hated himself for not telling her sooner and more often. If he had, maybe she wouldn’t feel as uncertain as she did now.

“You know, I’ve been thinking this forced downtime isn’t all that bad,” he said, smiling at her.

She slowly opened her eyes to stare up at him. “Are you feeling all right?”

Grinning, he nodded. “I like spending time with my best girl.”

She looked worried. “Seriously, Sam, are you dizzy or having a headache?”

He couldn’t blame her for doubting that he was enjoying his time off. He was a little shocked by it himself.

“I’m fine,” he said, kissing her chin. “Do you want to know what I think we need?”

“There’s no telling what’s running through that mind of yours,” she said, sitting up.

“I think we need a date night.”

“Are you serious?” Clearly stunned, she shook her head as if trying to clear it. “Where did that come from?”

“You’ve been wanting us to spend more time together as a couple,” he said, remembering one of her main complaints about their marriage. “What better way to do it than to have a date like before we got married? Remember how much fun we had?”

“I remember,” she said slowly. “But I wasn’t aware that you did.”

“I guess all this time here at home with you reminded me,” he said, shrugging one shoulder. “Will you go out with me this evening, Mrs. Rafferty?”

She smiled and he could tell she was warming to the idea. “That depends on where you want to go and what you want to do.”

“I noticed there’s an old classic on one of the satellite movie channels that you mentioned wanting to see and I thought we could make some popcorn and watch it,” he said as a plan began to take shape. “Of course, we may have seen it in the past six months and I just don’t remember.”

“What movie is that?” Her tone didn’t sound quite as doubtful.

“It has Clark Gable in it and he’s stuck in a motel with some woman.” He shook his head as he lay back on the blanket. “I don’t remember the title.”

“It Happened One Night,” she said, smiling. “It’s hilarious and I’d love to see it again.”

“Sounds like we have a plan, sweetheart,” he said, smiling at her.

“A date night with the television in the family room?” she murmured.

He nodded. “Remember the dates we used to have just hanging out at your apartment, watching that old twenty-inch television you used to have?” When she nodded, he folded his arms behind his head and stared up at the tree limbs. “You go ahead and read. I think I’m going to take a nap and rest up for tonight.”

“Why would you need to rest up when we’re just watching a movie in the family room?” There was a hint of a panic in her voice and he knew she remembered how the evenings had ended when they stayed in at her apartment. He usually spent the night making love to her.

“The movie doesn’t come on until after the nightly news,” he said reasonably. “I don’t want to fall asleep in the middle of it.”

Before she could respond, he reached for his hat to cover his eyes and while Bria read, Sam lay on the blanket beside her planning his next move. Seduction was out of the question. For one thing, she was still under the assumption that they were getting a divorce and had gone out of her way to avoid making love with him.

No, his best course of action would be to court her the way he had done when they first met—the way he probably should have done before she left the first time. They had watched movies, gone dancing and spent hours talking about how they wanted their lives to turn out.

All those things had worked for him to get her to say yes when he asked her to be his wife. Maybe they would work again in his effort to get her to stay married to him.

* * *

When the microwave beeped, Bria removed the bag of popcorn and, opening it, poured the fluffy kernels into a bowl. She had no idea what made Sam think back to when they had first started seeing each other, but why did he have to recall that at this stage of the game? Why couldn’t he have seen that the many times she had pointed out that she wanted them to spend time together as a couple the way they had in the beginning of their relationship?

“Sweetheart, the movie is about to start,” he said from the family room.

“Go ahead and make yourself comfortable on the couch,” she called back as she removed a tray from the cabinet to place the bowl of popcorn and two soft drinks on it. “I’ll be right there.”

When she carried the tray into the family room to set in on the coffee table, Sam was already positioned in a corner of the couch with one long leg stretched out across the cushions. She knew what he intended. He wanted her to sit between his legs and lean back against his chest the way they used to sit and watch movies when they first started seeing each other.

“Hey, where do you think you’re going?” he asked when she moved to sit in the chair flanking the couch. He caught her hand as she walked past him. “We can’t have a date night if I’m over here and you’re over there.”

“But I thought you’d be more comfortable—”

“Sweetheart, you’ve been entirely too worried about my comfort lately.” He gave her a grin that caused her lower stomach to flutter with anticipation. “I’ll let you know if something goes to sleep and starts hurting.”

She wasn’t as concerned with something going to sleep as she was with something waking up. But there really wasn’t anything she could think of to explain why it was a bad idea to cuddle on the couch with him while they watched the movie.

Sighing, she sat down between his legs and tentatively leaned back against his chest. Sam immediately wrapped his arms around her and held her snuggly to him.

“You’re way too tense,” he said, kissing the side of her neck. “Relax and lay your head against my shoulder, sweetheart.”

When she did as he requested, Bria closed her eyes as his warmth surrounded her. She tried to fight the feeling flowing through her, but there was no denying that in Sam’s arms, she felt as if she was where she belonged—where she would always belong.

She told herself she should move, that she should escape the temptation Sam posed to her peace of mind. But for the life of her, she couldn’t seem to find the strength. Just as had happened since returning to the ranch, each time he held her, each time he kissed her, the will to resist became that much weaker. This was the man she used to know, the man she fell in love with. She had missed the teasing touches, the subtle hints of how she made him want her and the feel of his body as he let her know his desire was only for her. There hadn’t been enough of that in the past couple of years. If there had been, maybe they could have worked past his not being with her when she miscarried and she wouldn’t have left him.

Reaching for the bowl to keep from turning to reach for Sam, Bria started to get some popcorn. When her fingers came into contact with Sam’s, her heart skipped a beat and she felt as if an electric charge coursed all the way from her fingertips up her arm to her shoulder.

“I think this is yours,” he whispered as he brought a piece of popcorn up to her mouth.

A shiver of excitement coursed through her from his warm breath feathering over her ear, and when she opened her mouth, his fingers brushing her lips as he fed her the popcorn caused a tingling sensation to pool in the most feminine part of her. She tried her best to concentrate on the movie and forget about the man holding her so close.

But when he shifted her to cradle her in his arms, then lowered his head to cover her mouth with his, Bria quickly realized she was fighting a losing battle. Heat swirled throughout her body as Sam traced her lips with his tongue, then coaxed her to open for him. As he stroked her with his tongue, the longing in her built to an almost unbearable ache and she couldn’t have stopped herself from kissing him back if her life depended on it.

She wanted Sam—had never stopped wanting him. He was the first and only man she had ever been with and the only man she would ever want. But if nothing changed—if everything stayed the same as it had been for the past couple of years between them—could she live the rest of her life that way?

The last thing she had wanted was to end their marriage, but she had been so lonely and unhappy that she felt there was no other alternative. He either didn’t understand or was too stubborn to see her point of view when she tried to explain it all to him, and although her heart was telling her to give him another chance, she was afraid they would fall back into the same pattern of her taking a backseat to the Sugar Creek Rodeo Company.

When he eased away from the kiss and raised his head, the heat in his eyes stole her breath. “Sam, I can’t—”

“Shh, sweetheart,” he interrupted, smiling. “You’re missing the movie and this is one of the best parts.”

As he helped her sit up and nestled her back against his chest, the feel of his strong arousal pressed to her backside caused a tremor to track its way through her. How was she supposed to concentrate on anything when all she could think about was the man holding her so close? Or the fact that as insane as it was, she wanted him just as much?

“I’m really tired,” she said, pretending to yawn. “I think I’ll go upstairs to bed, but you go ahead and finish watching the movie.”

“No, I’ll go upstairs with you,” he said, using the remote to turn off the television. He gave her a look that made her feel warm all over. “I’m pretty tired myself.”

When he followed her upstairs and they entered the master suite, Bria took a deep breath as she changed into her nightshirt. It was becoming more difficult by the day to think of plausible reasons why they shouldn’t make love. Sam wouldn’t hear of her sleeping in the bedroom down the hall because she was afraid she might disturb him. And how much longer would she be able to deny the desire building inside herself and keep from turning to him to make love to her?

She tried to remind herself that it was only because the doctor had ordered him not to work that she was getting quality time with him now. But she had missed the easy connection they had when they were dating and in the first months of their marriage. To experience that again was proving to be much more difficult to resist with each passing day.

As they got ready for bed her anxiety increased, and by the time they were lying on the mattress and he took her into his arms, Bria’s nerves felt as if they were about to snap.

“Sweetheart, you’re way too tense,” he said, turning her on her side to face away from him.

The feel of his strong hands gently massaging her shoulder and neck muscles was heaven and hell rolled into one. Any time Sam touched her, her longing for him increased. But as he worked the knots from her muscles, it felt as if he massaged away her will to resist him.

“Sam, I—”

“It’s all right,” he said, kissing the back of her neck. “I know you’re exhausted.” He turned her back to face him. “We can make love when you feel more rested.”

As he pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her, Bria wasn’t sure whether her sigh was from relief or disappointment. She had started to tell him that she was extremely tired, but she wasn’t entirely certain she wouldn’t have asked him to make love to her. It had been so long since she had shared that intimacy with Sam and no matter that none of the issues between them had been resolved, she missed sharing that with him.

Relaxed from his soothing touch and secure in his arms, Bria felt the peacefulness of sleep begin to overtake her. There would be plenty of time tomorrow to think about the disparity between what her heart wanted and what her mind was telling her to do. At the moment, she felt she was where she belonged and that was all that mattered.

* * *

The next afternoon as he walked back to the house, Sam smiled as he thought about his date night with Bria. He could tell she was waging a battle within herself, and the part of her that still wanted him seemed to be winning. That was all the encouragement he needed to proceed with his plan.

He was going to pull out all the stops to get her to stay at Sugar Creek Ranch. After giving it serious thought, he had come up with a project that he was certain would make her happy. That’s why he had snuck out to spend the entire morning down by the creek and couldn’t wait to show her the surprise he had for her.

“Bria, sweetheart, could you come here a minute?” he called as he entered the back door.

“Sam? Are you all right?”

He heard her hurrying down the hall toward the kitchen and knew she had to have been worried about him. He had told her he was going to the barn to talk to the ranch foreman about some new bucking horses and she had probably called to check on him.

“I couldn’t be better,” he assured her.

“Where have you been?” she asked when she rushed up to him. “I called the barn a few minutes ago and Roy Lee said he hadn’t seen you.”

Sam could see the worry in her eyes and automatically put his arms around her to hold her close. He knew he shouldn’t be elated by her obvious concern for him, but it was further proof that he wasn’t fighting a lost cause.

“I’m fine, Bria. I didn’t mean to upset you.” His spirits soared when she put her arms around his waist and hugged him back. “I’ve been down by the creek.”

She leaned back to give him a disapproving look. “What were you doing down there? You know someone is supposed to be with you when you go that far.”

“Bria, I haven’t had a dizzy spell in the past few days and I don’t need a babysitter. But I don’t want to talk about that now.” Smiling, he took her hand in his and started for the door. “I have something I want to show you.”

“At the creek?” she asked as she followed him. “What is it?”

“If I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise,” he said, grinning as they walked down the path toward Sugar Creek.

When they reached the cottonwood tree, she frowned as she looked around. “I don’t see anything different.”

“Look closer,” he said, pointing toward some stakes with heavy cord strung between them. “Isn’t that where you said you thought would be a nice place for a gazebo with a swing?”

Her confused expression turned to surprise, then one of delight. “Are you really planning to have one built?”

Stepping up behind her, he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her back against his chest. “It’s what you mentioned you thought would be nice, isn’t it?”

“Yes, but that was right after we got married that I talked about it.” She shook her head. “I thought you had forgotten.”

“Oh, I didn’t exactly forget,” he said, nibbling kisses along the delicate shell of her ear. “I just never seemed to have the time while I was home to call a contractor and get the work started.”

He knew the moment the words left his mouth that he must have touched a nerve by the way her body stiffened. “It wasn’t that you didn’t have the time, Sam. It was more like you wouldn’t take the time.” She pulled from his arms. “There’s a big difference.”

“I’m taking the time now,” he pointed out, wondering how things could have gone downhill so damn fast. She had seemed genuinely happy about him building the gazebo for her and now she looked as if she was angry with him. “Don’t you still want it?”

“I didn’t say I wanted it to begin with, only that I thought it would be nice. But that’s not the point.” She closed her eyes as if trying to hold on to her patience. When she opened them, she shook her head. “We both know that you were forced to take the time off. It’s not like you did it voluntarily. And the only reason you’re thinking about building it now is because you’re bored and want something to do. As soon as you’re cleared to go back out on the road with your livestock company, you’ll forget all about it.”

Stuffing his hands into the front pockets of his jeans, Sam shrugged. “It doesn’t matter whether this little vacation was forced on me or not, I’m taking the time to do it now.” He stepped forward to put his index finger beneath her chin and tilt her head up until their eyes met. “It’s something you’d like and it will get done, Bria. I’ve made sure you have everything you want and I’m not about to stop doing that now.”

She stared at him for several long moments before she turned and started walking back toward the house. “Whatever you say, Sam.”

As he fell into step beside her, he wisely let the matter drop. Bria had her mind made up and nothing he could say would change it. Besides, she would see soon enough that he meant what he said when the construction crew showed up and started building the gazebo.

But it bothered him that she doubted he would see the project through to the end. He had bent over backward to see that he got her everything she had ever mentioned she thought would be nice or he thought she might like to have. She had mentioned she didn’t have time to read as much as she would like, so he had hired Rosa to do the cooking and cleaning. When she said the road leading to the house was a little bumpy, he had a crew come in and put down an asphalt driveway the half mile from the main road up to the house. She saw a necklace and earrings in a magazine she thought was pretty and two days later she was wearing them. What more did she want from him?

He supposed he could point out all the things he had done for her, all the ways he had shown her how much she meant to him. But that just wasn’t his style. Hell, she knew all that and it hadn’t made a difference three months ago. Why would it make a difference now?

On their way to the house, he motioned toward the barn. “I think I’ll check in with Roy Lee about the new string of bucking horses. They should be ready by the time the doctor releases me for work.”

“You do that, Sam,” she said, staring straight ahead.

Watching her walk the rest of the way to the house, he shook his head. Bria was still in a snit and he didn’t have a clue why. Maybe if he gave her a little space, she would calm down and see that everything he did was for her. And in the meantime, he hoped to think of something that would restore her good mood and put his plan to show her that they belonged together back on track.