Fire Always Burns

chapter 8

The fire could not be contained. Firefighters dug trenches only to have flames fly overhead, laughing as they danced into the trees. The water sprayed from their hoses, but the fire simply blazed higher. Mother Nature refused to cry, instead blowing hot wind across the arid landscape, feeding the fire.

The next two weeks were perfect. I lived on this wonderful high where everything seemed to be going my way. Andrew and I spent almost every day together, laughing, kissing, and daydreaming.

We started imagining what it would be like to go to school together, where we could be together without worrying about hurting our friends. My past felt so far behind me that it could never catch up. With Ray in the picture, Andrew's mom had almost stopped calling him at work to check up on him. She was full of a self confidence I had never seen, radiating happiness like a small sun.

With his mom finally behaving like an adult, I convinced Andrew to contact Colorado State University and tell them he would be starting in the fall. I even applied myself. I thought that Andrew and a new school might be enough to erase my past. I could try again and do it right this time. I thought things were finally going right, the future starting to look bright again.

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"How many screws do you have?" I asked looking at the boxes scattered across the counter. I hopped up on the edge of the counter, swinging my feet as I watched him work.

"I'm not one to kiss and tell, but I can tell you all about the nails, " Andrew grinned wickedly at me as he organized the boxes of screws and nails into piles.

"You are such a boy," I stuck my tongue out at him and he just smirked at me.

"You like it," he countered walking around to the front of the counter.

"Yes, yes I do," I said as he put his hands on either side of me on the counter. "How could I not?"

I felt a tingle of anticipation run through my body as his stomach pushed into my knees, his hands going to my hips. I leaned forward and closed my eyes, knowing he was mine. I felt our lips touch, electricity passing between us. Our tongues met, feeding the fire burning through my core. No one had ever made me feel this way with just a kiss.

"What are you two doing?"

I felt Andrew freeze, my own blood stopping cold. We broke apart like ice hitting the floor, each of us picking a random direction. I felt the blood rush to my cheeks and drain out of me at the same time. Luke stood in the doorway, his green work apron hanging limply from his hand. His hazel eyes full of betrayal. I slid off the counter, avoiding his piercing gaze.

"I said, what are you two doing?" He glanced back and forth between Andrew and me, his hand tightening on the apron.

"Luke, it's not what it looks like-" Andrew started, but Luke cut him off.

"Not what it looks like? It looks like you and Holly were kissing. Like you two have something going on. You want to lie to me about that, Andrew?" Luke's voice was cold, his knuckles starting to turn white on his apron.

"Luke, we didn't mean for you to find out like this," I said softly.

"So at least you did mean for me to find out. That's nice. How long has this been going on?" Luke's eyes blazed a cold fire.

"Not long. It just kind of happened, and we couldn't stop it," Andrew said quietly.

"Couldn't stop it? Yeah right. You chose not to stop it. We promised to never do this. You both promised me, promised each other to not do this," Luke said, frustration dripping off each word. He paused for a moment, the anger emanating out of him in waves as he kept his voice even. "Do you know how much I have wanted to break that promise? How close I've come to doing what you two were just doing? But I stopped. I kept the promise."

"What do you mean?" my mouth blurted out before I could stop. Luke rounded on me, his eyes fierce.

"Doesn't matter. Holly, you aren't ready for this. Neither of you have any idea what you are doing," Luke's voice was soft and low. I had never seen him so angry. It was a cold fury that scared me more than him yelling. He continued, his voice frosting the entire room. "I can't believe you two would do this. I didn't know our friendship, all of our friendships meant so little to you. Holly, I want you out of this shop. Tell your dad to get the parts he needs from another store. Andrew, your shift is done for the day. If you need to change your shifts, talk to my dad. I don't want to see either of you."

"Luke, please, we didn't mean to hurt you," I said taking a step towards him. He put up his empty hand to stop me, his other hand gripping his apron so tight I was sure it was going to break.

"Holly, if you didn't mean to hurt me, you wouldn't have done this. You would have kept the promise you made to your friends. I thought you were better than this- I thought you were smarter than this. I want you both out of my shop. Now."

Andrew and I looked towards one another, and back towards Luke. Cold fury and pain swirled around him, filling the room like a snowstorm. Andrew took off his work apron and set it carefully on the counter, putting his hand on my shoulder. He pulled me towards the front door, and I glanced back over my shoulder to look back. Luke stood in the center of the store, his hand still gripping his apron and a look of utter betrayal and loss on his face.

I had betrayed the one person who had always looked out for me. Andrew opened the door, and I felt a cold tear run down my face. The wind battered both of us as we walked to Andrew's car in silence, my heart growing heavier with every step. I slid into the passenger seat, the plastic leather cold and hard. The wind howled outside the window as we sat there in silence for a moment.

"I can't believe how bad I feel right now," I whispered as I wiped a tear off my cheek.

"I feel the same way," Andrew agreed quietly.

"What did Luke mean when he said he came close to breaking the promise?" I asked as Andrew started up the car.

"Britney. He has a thing for Britney. When you went away and Eli got his job in the city, it was just the three of us. I was still really busy dealing with all Dad's stuff, so I wasn't around much. He and Britney got really close. I didn't know just how close until today though. I feel terrible," he said quietly as he turned onto the main road.

The sun was setting, but instead of turning the world into shades of gold, it hid behind the clouds and simply dimmed the world to gray. A cold snow spitted at the car. It wasn't enough moisture to make anything wet, just enough to leave spots on the windshield and suck the heat from the world. Flakes hit the windshield like little angry bullets, evaporating as soon as they touched the ground.

"Can I come hang out at your place? I don't feel like going home," I asked staring out into the deepening gloom. Andrew nodded and silence filled the car. Neither one of us felt much like talking. Andrew punched the radio, looking for something to fill the quiet.

"In other news, this has been the driest winter on record. The national weather service reports that the drought is likely to continue. Officials are already concerned for the high fire danger present in most counties throughout the state," the radio reporter droned. Andrew switched the station to oldies. A snowflake hit my window, melting quickly and distorting the world outside. All I could see in the darkening night was Luke's face and the pain we had just caused him.