Fire Always Burns

chapter 15

An epic battle. Men verses flame, spirit against nature. Water poured from hoses like rain. Planes and helicopters poured red dust as though it had no end. Masked yellow uniforms felled trees and dug trenches, giving the flames no place to run. The flames screamed in defiance, casting embers to the sky. The chief called for more. It had to be enough.

My voice didn't seem to carry in the smoke and I quickly grew hoarse. I knew I was going to have to leave with or without my dog soon if I wanted to make it off the mountain at all. I called out frantically, hating the idea of leaving her to smoke and flame because I couldn't find her.

I headed deeper into the pine trees, down towards the tree fort Andrew and I had made as kids. Luke's dad had given us scrap wood and we had made a fort one summer long ago. Shadow loved it in the trees by the fort. There was a family of squirrels that lived in the fort now and whenever the fence went down, Shadow would try and escape to the fort like it was her own secret base. I hoped I would find her there, but I knew if I didn't I was going to have to head back alone.

The smoke was darker in the trees, the dry needles crunching under my shoes as I headed down the steep slope. I couldn't see Shadow anywhere and my voice hurt from the smoke and screaming. I turned to head back, hoping the dog was smarter than me and waiting back at the house. A flash of golden fur caught my attention in the trees up ahead, and I called out to her and ran forward.

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He hit the speed dial. Holly's phone rang and went to voice mail. He was going to be furious if she was just somewhere else and doing this to make him worry. He started pacing, chewing on the inside of his lip. Something was wrong and it was making his whole world feel off balance.

Bing. Home. Can we talk?

He barely read the message before replying, Why aren't you evacuated? Why aren't you here? He glanced at the TV, where the image of fire danced on the screen. He didn't wait for her to type back. He hit the call button, anxious to hear she was alright. She couldn't possibly be at home- why would she ignore the evacuation call?

"Holly? Why aren't you at the evacuation site? Are you alright?" He wanted to scream into the phone.

"I haven't gotten a call yet- I didn't think it was that close," her voice crackled over the line. He was glad to hear her voice, but her answer terrified him as he looked at the fire map.

"Holly, you have to get out of there- they are saying that whole mountain is about to go up once the wind shifts. You have get out of there now, Holly!" His hand was shaking as he pressed the phone to his ear. He could barely hear her as she told him she didn't have a car.

"Holly, I can't hear you- you're breaking up. Holly? HOLLY!" he yelled into the phone, hearing only static on the other end. He tried to dial her again, but it went straight to voice-mail.

A cold doom settled around his shoulders. In his mind he heard her screams as the fire engulfed her. The ash from her burned home falling on his head, her voice calling his name. He had to do something.

"You alright, Andrew? You look like you saw a ghost," Ray put his hand on Andrew's shoulder, shocking him out of his morbid daydream.

"Holly didn't get the evacuation call. She's still at home," he whispered, his eyes big as saucers. Ray paled and swallowed hard. The two men's eyes met.

"I'll get my truck," Ray said. Andrew nodded and followed him out to the parking lot.

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I heard the crack before I felt it, my foot sliding into a hole and twisting as I fell. The pain was immediate, and I struggled to pull my foot free. Small branches and sticky sap caught in my shoelaces, as I pulled it out of the hole. It flopped on the ground, bending the wrong direction. Tears filled my eyes, burning against the smoke. It didn't hurt as much as I expected, but I had a feeling that would quickly change.

I struggled to my knees, tears running down my face. I looked up and saw Shadow coming towards me through the trees, her long tail wagging. She licked my face, taking tears and soot as I held onto her soft fur. She whined softly as I hooked her leash to her collar, and prepared to stand.

It was so quiet. The birds had stopped singing. I heard the wind in the trees, the pine needles rustling together in fear of the flame. A primal panic started to grow in my belly, a need to run, to flee and escape. I battled to my feet, but my ankle shot lightning bolts of red pain through my leg. I couldn't put any weight, let alone walk on it. I bit my lip, trying to distract myself from the pain.

I needed a plan. "Come on, use your brain, Holly!" I yelled out into the woods. The trees absorbed the sound but it released the fear out of my brain. Inspiration struck- my old bicycle was in the garage. I had to make it back to the house. If I made it to the garage, I could pull out the bike and coast down the hill and not need my ankle. I knew the tires were flat, but at this point that was the least of my worries. I looked at Shadow and she wagged her tail. I told myself she was trying to encourage me. I took a step and screamed as I collapsed on the ground.

It took a minute for the red haze of pain to lift. I had to keep moving, the fire was coming. I had to get to the garage and to my pink bicycle. I could do it. I had to do it. I started crawling on my hands and knees, the pine needles and dried grass poking and sticking to my skin. Pine bark and rocks scraped my knees, but at least I was moving forward. All I had to do was get to the garage.

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Ray skidded to a halt in Holly's driveway and Andrew ran up to the front door. He froze as he saw it was open, a duffel bag and dog food sitting on the front porch. He pushed the door open, calling out her name. The house was deathly quiet. Andrew's hair stood on end. Where was she?

"I'll throw her stuff in the truck. Where is she? Could she have gotten a ride from someone?" Ray asked picking up the bag and throwing it over his shoulder. Concern flooded his voice. Andrew shook his head and ran his hand through his hair. This felt wrong.

"We had to blow through that barricade- I doubt anyone is left up here. I'm going to check the back- she is probably just getting Shadow," Andrew said, hoping he sounded more confident than he felt. Ray nodded and started putting the bag in the back of the truck. Andrew ran through the house, calling her name just to make sure she wasn't inside before heading out on the back porch.

The swing creaked as a gust of wind caught it. It smelled like burning up here, the sky turning pitch black. He looked down into the yard, hoping to see Holly walking up with Shadow, but there was nothing. A sickly yellow sunshine broke through and fell on the empty yard; it made Andrew's blood run cold.

"Power's out," Ray said joining him on the porch. Andrew's head turned quickly towards him.

"That mean's Shadow's fence is out- Holly must be looking for her," Andrew felt a slight sense of pride that his voice didn't quake. He felt like every word should have come out vibrato.

"Would she have gone after her dog? The fire is going to get here any minute," Ray shifted on his feet, his eyes scanning down the hill for any trace of flames.

"She didn't know how close it was. She would have gone for her dog," Andrew glanced at him.

"We look then," said Ray with a nod. "We won't leave here without her."

"If Shadow got loose, then she probably went to the fort. We'll check there first," Andrew said.

"We better hurry," Ray's voice filled with urgency. Andrew looked out and from the vantage point of the porch could see embers starting to float up from the trees in the valley.

Andrew sprinted down the hill towards the old fort, Ray close behind him. He had to find her. He had to save her. He could never forgive himself if he lost her this way, without telling her he was sorry. Without telling her that he loved her.

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It was easier to breath down low to the ground, but the smoke still made my lungs hurt. I pulled my shirt up over my nose, but I still had to concentrate on not coughing, breathing only through my nose. My eyes watered with the soot, and I could feel tears tracking down my face. Shadow kept with me, whining gently and pulling me towards the house. I just had to get to the garage.

I was so tired. It didn't seem like crawling would be that much more effort, but the incline, the rocks, the slip of the pine needles and the pain in my ankle were taking a toll. I pulled myself to a tree and leaned my back against it. It hurt to breathe, but my lungs begged for oxygen.

Shadow whined and pulled softly, her eyes looking past me. I followed her line of sight to the edge of our property. A faint glow was starting to creep into the trees. The fire was coming. I felt a surge of adrenaline push through me, my ankle and the pain forgotten. I had to get to the garage. My pink bicycle. If I could just get there everything would be fine.

I started moving again, moving forward on sheer will. I could hear a crackling noise growing behind me. I didn't know if the heat was the fire or just my imagination, but I knew I was sweating. Shadow pulled me by her leash, the house in throwing distance. I didn't know I could be this tired; I didn't know I could hurt this much. The adrenaline was wearing off, but I still had a ways to go. My hand slipped on a pile of pine needles, causing me to nose dive into the ground. I tasted dirt and pine sap. The garage seemed so far away. I looked behind me and I could see orange beginning to dance in the trees.

Flames danced like sprites across the branches, while orange and red imps frolicked on the dry grasses below. The smoke was black and heavy, waving into the sky like the hair of a demon. It was beautiful in a destructive way. I wondered if I was going to die of suffocation or burns.

Shadow barked, a high pitched yelp that made me look back towards the house. The sky was almost blue compared to the demon crawling up the backside of the hill. She whined and pulled on the leash. All I had to do was make it to the garage. Shadow would never let me live it down if I didn't at least try. I forced my body to move up the hill again.

I barely made it the length of my body up the hill before sliding back down the incline again. I didn't remember this hill ever being this steep. I started to cry, tears running down my face. I could hear a noise that reminded me of bonfires and camping, knowing the flames were coming closer.

Shadow whined, tugging on the leash. I let her go. Maybe she could make it out. I wondered if Andrew would feed her for me. I just wanted to give up. Just to rest for a moment. A small voice started screaming in my head, screaming that I didn't have a moment. I had to get up and move. It coaxed and pleaded with me to keep going. The voice in my head finally resorted to wondering what people would think when they found my body; what Andrew would think.

"Fine, I'll move. They will find my body clawing up this damn hillside," I growled and grabbed the earth, forcing myself up. There was no way I was going down without a fight. My hands were bleeding, covered in tiny scratches from broken pine branches and rocks. I couldn't feel my knees anymore, but I was sure they were nothing but hamburger by now. I knew I wasn't imagining the heat anymore, the sweat evaporating as fast as I could make it. I could barely breathe. My eyes were full of dirt and smoke, I could barely see and I didn't dare wipe my eyes. Shadow began barking, the noise seeming hazy and far away.

"I am coming you damn dog! I am going as fast as I can! I am not as good on four legs as you are," I snarled, digging my fingers into the ground and pushing forward. I had to just make it to the garage.

"Holly?" I thought I heard Andrew's voice. It couldn't be Andrew. Andrew was mad at me. I loved him though. Didn't people always say they heard the voices of people they loved when they were dying? A hallucination. I knew I had to be imagining his voice. I loved him and my brain was letting me hear him one last time.

"Shadow, come here, girl! Where is she? Where is Holly?" That seemed a strange thing for my imagination to say. But, I was going to die, so who knew what my imagination might come up with. I reached for another handful of earth. Shadow kept barking.

"Holly! Ray, I found her!" Andrew's voice seemed closer, but still far away. I held onto the ground, my fingers pulling at the grass to keep moving forward. I felt hands on my shoulders. I looked up and saw a shirtless Andrew picking me up. Now I knew I was hallucinating.

"I got you Holly, I got you," Andrew whispered into my ear. "Can you walk?"

I felt my lips make the motion but no sound came out, so I just shook my head. Andrew picked me up like I was a child, cradling me in his arms. He was so handsome in the firelight. I wished Shadow would stop barking, she was ruining the moment.

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The smoke was getting thicker, and Andrew pulled off his shirt and held it up over his nose. The acrid fumes burned the inside of his nose. It was hard to see, the fire's smoke blocking out the sunshine and filling the air with ash. He started calling out her name, his voice frantic.

Shadow barked. He spun on his heel, heading along the hill towards the frantic barking, calling out for Holly. Shadow ran up to him, nuzzling his hand and wagging her tail.

"Shadow, come here, girl! Where is she?" Andrew asked picking up her trailing leash. As if he expected an answer, he asked again. "Where is Holly?" Shadow whined and pulled him down the hill.

Holly lay on the ground, her hands dug into the steep hillside like she was fighting to stay upright. Pools of pine needles lay around her, her face covered in dirt and ash. "Holly!" he cried. He could see the fire in the trees, flames licking up and down the parched bark. He dropped his shirt and ran towards her yelling, "Ray, I found her!" as Shadow barked.

Her lips were white against the ash on her face, her dark hair tangled and filled with needles and branches. He put his hands on her back, checking to see that she was breathing. He started whispering to her, as he brushed her off and pulled her to sitting. She stared blankly at him, like she couldn't believe he was there.

"Can you walk?" He asked. She looked confused for a moment, her lips forming a no as she shook her head. The heat from the fire was making him sweat, he could hear it roaring in the distance like a hungry beast. He scooped her up, and she put her head on his shoulder as he started back up the hill. She seemed so light in his arms, like he could carry her forever. It only took a moment to make his way up the hill and around the house, calling out to Ray to start the truck.

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I felt Andrew power up the hill, holding me close to his chest. He made the distance between where I was and the house in a matter of seconds where I had struggled for what seemed like hours. I wrapped my arms around his neck, breathing in his masculine scent. His bare skin didn't smell like smoke, but like running water and sunshine. He was so solid beneath me, his body pressed against mine. I wondered if he was going to the garage, because we would never fit on my bicycle together. A car horn sounded as Andrew rounded the corner of my house, Ray's truck in my driveway.

"Ray, I got her and Shadow- I think she's going into shock," Andrew shouted.

"Get in the back and lay her down, we gotta get out of here now!" Ray yelled back. I heard a metal thunk as the back of the truck slammed down. Andrew set me down gently on the warm metal, and called Shadow's name. She jumped up next to me, her fur brushing my leg. Andrew slammed the truck gate up and jumped in the back.

"Go! Go!" He yelled, pounding the side of the truck, gathering me back up in his arms. The engine revved and I peeked out over the side of the truck. My house stood illuminated against a sea of black and sparks. I never did make it to my bicycle.