Ethan and I fell asleep on the couch, watching movies. I was so emotionally drained that I found I was falling asleep at the drop of a hat lately. I woke up in the middle of the night with a kink in my neck and had to move to my bed. I nudged Ethan and told him I was going to my room. Without saying anything, he followed me in there and held me the rest of the night.
I woke up before Ethan, and lay there thinking about my life. I was wrapped in the arms of the man who had been my best friend for years, and the man who I had been in love with for three years was finally giving me what I wanted, but at a hurtful price. Did I still want Paul, or was Ethan my answer? I turned and looked at Ethan’s sleeping face and smiled at the sight.
No matter what happened, I knew I couldn’t survive losing Ethan. He has been my rock and the thought of not having him gave me chills. I now realized the feelings I’d recently developed for him were real, but it still scared me to death and I was apprehensive. He told me he loved me and that he has loved me for forever. I knew he was attracted to me, but love? That wasn’t something I’d considered.
I wasn’t sure what to do. Looking at him, all I wanted to do was just snuggle close and forget the rest of the world. I wanted him by my side with no worries, no stress, but that wasn’t reality and I couldn’t dodge my life forever. Paul made it clear he wasn’t giving up, and a part of me didn’t want him to, even though he’d shown me, very clearly, just what an a*shole he could be. I couldn’t ignore my heart. He was still in there.
Ethan stirred and pulled me close. I couldn’t hurt this man, just the thought tore me apart, but I couldn’t push him away either. I needed him too much and I wanted more from him if I was honest with myself. Could I really want two men at the same time? Was that even normal?
“Good morning, angel,” he said and I jumped a little. I felt him chuckle deep in his chest. “I didn’t mean to startle you,” he laughed as he ran his hand through my hair. “I could get used to waking up next to you.”
“Good morning, and me too,” I said shyly, ducking my head.
“No being shy with me, no matter what’s changed,” he whispered, continuing to rub his fingers through my hair. “Now that I’ve said it, I’m going to say it often. I love you, Aly, no matter what.”
I felt the affect his words had on me. What I had done to deserve this man, I’d never know. I couldn’t tell him the same yet, but he didn’t care. He was here.
“Thank you,” I whispered back. I wrapped my arms around his neck and breathed in his scent. He always smelled of citrus and I loved it.
We stayed in bed like that for a while. It was Sunday and the fact that I had to go into the office tomorrow, made me nauseous. So far I’d been able to stay strong around Paul, but that had only been for minutes at a time. I hadn’t been around him for hours since the incident and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep my strength around him for hours at a time.
Ethan finally got out of bed and made me breakfast. He looked so sexy at the stove, stirring eggs without a shirt on. He really was an amazing specimen and I suddenly wasn’t shy to stare. His abs rippled as he bent over to grab the spoon he dropped and when he caught me staring, a huge grin appeared on his face.
“Like what you see, angel?” he asked, teasing.
I continued staring and nodded. “Yep, sure do. You are hot, Ethan.”
His grin got wider. “Oh yeah? Well coming from you, that absolutely made my day.” He turned off the stove and walked over to the bar where I was sitting, spooning the scrambled eggs onto my plate.
“Bon appétit,” he smiled.
I took a bite and my mouth watered at the taste. He had added some cheese and garlic salt to the eggs, and they were delicious. I continued to eat, savoring every bite. I saw him toss some toast onto my plate and set a glass of orange juice down. He finally came and sat by my side, grinning at my reaction to his breakfast.
“You like it?” he asked, nudging me with his shoulder.
“Mmm hmm,” I moaned, swallowing another bite. Ethan’s eyes suddenly changed, desire taking over. It made me a little nervous but excited too.
Ethan stood up and I looked at him questioningly. He came up behind me and took my fork from my hand, setting it on my plate. I felt him grab my hand as he pulled me off of my stool.
“What are you doing?” I asked, confused.
“This,” he said as he touched his mouth to mine and placed his hands on my waist. My heart jumped when I felt him pull me to him and how much he desired me. His tongue slid between my lips and I immediately opened my mouth, welcoming him. He groaned as his tongue dove in my mouth and turned his head, deepening the kiss.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I allowed myself to let his amazing kisses strip me of all thought. His hand went to the back of my neck, pushing me even closer, and all sense left me as he started walking me to the couch.
The backs of my knees hit the couch as he pushed me down, landing on top of me. We continued kissing, our passion growing by the minute. I wanted him to touch me everywhere, but didn’t dare let him know at the moment. I didn’t want anything to ruin what we were doing.
He lifted his mouth and touched his forehead to mine, breathing fast. “Oh, Aly, you have no idea what you do to me, what you’ve always done to me,” he breathed.
I smiled up at him, running my fingers through his hair. I loved hearing that. I had no idea what was going to happen, but as I looked in his eyes, I shoved those thoughts aside and brought his head back down to mine for another amazing kiss.