A Summer to Remember

chapter Twenty-Two

The following day, I awoke early. Not only was the show that evening but the cryptic message Talia had given me the night before weighed heavily on my mind. I tried to forget about it during my shower and afterwards, I slipped into a colorful short-sleeved, orange bustier mini-dress courtesy of Alexander McQueen and a pair of orange and black striped platform sandals by Christian Louboutin.

After I allowed my hair to dry on its own and wore it in long, wavy locks and put on the lightest makeup I could get away with, I left the bathroom. I walked into the bedroom and placed my makeup bag back into my luggage before I stood and looked outside the open picture window.

The air conditioning was at a pleasant temperature but outside, a bright burning sun and impossible humidity awaited us with stifling heat.

Paul strolled up to me before he kissed the top of my head. He looked casual in a pair of a fitted, expensive blue jeans and a white, short-sleeved silk shirt. “You look great. Ready to go get some breakfast.”

I smiled before I nodded my head. “I’m starving.”

He turned me around and kissed my lips. I didn’t care his open mouthed display of affection had ruined my perfect lip gloss. “Listen, today is going to be fine. We’ll get through it the same way we do everything else. Don’t be nervous. I don’t know what they have on me but it certainly isn’t insider trading.”

It was a joke I was supposed to find funny but I merely smiled. “Go on downstairs. I have to repair my lip gloss.”

“I can wait for you—”

“No!” I exclaimed a bit more forcefully than I intended to before I grinned at him again. “Find us a nice intimate table.”

Paul’s features seemed conflicted before he finally said, “All right. I will meet you downstairs. Don’t be too long.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

I repaired my face before I grabbed a matching Hermès Kelly bag in leather and left our suite before I walked to the elevator. The couple next to me had a copy of the Miami Times as the wife brandished it at her husband several times to make a point in lightening-fast Spanish.

“Excuse me, may I borrow your paper?” I wondered out loud in proper Castilian.

The couple turned their head my way. “Yes, of course,” the wife replied in perfect English.

I immediately took it as soon as it was handed over and went directly to the Entertainment Section. It was buried but I soon found the story. There were two photos: the picture on the left was one of up-coming actress Kendall Lawson and next to her was Paul. I knew they dated so that wasn’t really a shock.

What was a complete and utter surprise that struck me like a ton of bricks was the most recent photo on the right they had of her. She was still thin but she wore an ivory shift dress and matching Yves Saint Laurent Tribute sandals. She stood next to her current boyfriend, an extremely popular hip-hop star from Brazil with café au lait skin, a gorgeous face and a body to die for. His arm held her delicately by the waist and he wore a large smile on his face. Her baby bump was hard to miss because she looked well into her second or perhaps her final trimester.

I scanned the piece before I got to the good part:

Although Ms. Lawson has kept mum on the paternity of the child she is expecting in October, it is pretty obvious the father isn’t Kool Luc, her current flame she has dated for the past four months. This time last year, the blockbuster actress dated Paul Branson, an Investment Banker at CDG Investments in Manhattan. When contacted directly by the Miami Times, Ms. Lawson’s Rep remained steadfast and would not give a firm “Yes” or “No” as to whether Mr. Branson is the responsible party.

My breath fell in slight pants and I tried to control myself as I handed the paper back to the older before I boarded the elevator with the couple. There wasn’t much that could be said. He obviously didn’t know or he would have told me. Perhaps she was afraid he would try to talk her into an abortion although I refused to believe Paul was that shallow.

The elevator dinged and I slowly exited though I wasn’t sure I could handle all the different emotions going through my head at the moment. I walked to our table in a fog and sat across from him. He held a copy of the paper in his hands and bit on his lower lip.

The waiter came over and took my order that consisted of a vegetarian egg-white omelet and a mimosa. I knew I needed alcohol like a hole in the head but I couldn’t conduct this conversation with Paul dead sober. My mouth might spit out words I would regret later and sometimes it was best to hide one’s feelings than to say something out of spite or anger.

To say I was angry was an understatement of the year. I knew it probably wasn’t his fault and many times after a relationship ended, an accidental pregnancy was discovered but many women usually took care of the situation. Obviously, Kendall, being the good little German-Scots-Irish Catholic Midwesterner, decided it was better to have the child than to get rid of it in utero.

Paul sat in silence until the waiter left before he inquired, “Are you feeling all right? I can only assume you borrowed someone’s paper and read the story yourself.”

“I did. I’m assuming she didn’t tell you otherwise you would have mentioned this very important information to me especially since you are aware of my condition.”

He glanced at me with guilt-ridden, crystal blue eyes. “I’ve known since June. It was the reason why you found me in the Hamptons on my own. I didn’t know what to do because Kendall informed me of her predicament but she also told me she’d started dating Kool Luc and neither wanted me to be a part of the child’s life.

“I begged, pleaded with her to allow me to at least send child support but she doesn’t want me at the birth. If I am not there then she can’t put me on the birth certificate because we’re not married. I needed to clear my head and at the time I was dating Ashley. If she found out, she wouldn’t have understood and would have made my life a living hell.”

I breathed deeply before I said, “After the Rohypnol incident with Ashley, it still didn’t make any sense for you tell me then? I truly want to know why you are treating me like I will break like shattered glass if you confide any of your secrets to me?”

“Listen, I don’t have a good excuse for not telling you, Jerrica. Maybe I was nervous and scared…this whole ‘incident’ you keep talking about, it’s not the end of the world. I, technically, will have a child but it means nothing if Kendall doesn’t want me to be involved. She’s known Kool Luc for a long time and chances are they will probably get married. That’s why we broke up in the first place. She cheated on me with him.”

“Oh.” I couldn’t think of anything reassuring to say to Paul because part of me was still too pissed off about how he’d known for almost two and half months his ex was expecting his baby but he hadn’t bothered to tell me.

He grabbed my hands and squeezed them gently. “Please don’t let this come between us. If it makes you feel any better, I was just a sperm donor for all the impact I will have on that kid’s life. She wants nothing to do with me and the breakup was extremely painful despite my not being in love with her. I almost feel like she did it on purpose so she could have one white kid and her parents won’t think too badly of her when she marries Kool Luc and they have children together.”

“It’s not that…” I trailed off and looked around the restaurant. “I always feel like we are starting over every time another secret comes out. It would have been so much easier if you’d been honest with me about what ever has happened in your life that is going to have a direct impact on our relationship.”

His crystal blue eyes turned cold and he glared at me with a look on his face that clearly spelled out he was the one who was pissed off now. “Listen, Jerrica, I love you very much but if every time something unsavory pops up about me in the news or gossip starts to fly that makes you uncomfortable then perhaps I am not the one for you. Don’t get me wrong, I love you with all my heart, but you have to understand if I kept anything from you it’s because I honestly thought you were in no position to handle what I would have to say.

“This is hard on me too. I work for one of the most prestigious investment banking firms in the country. Do you think they are going to want this kind of sordid news floating out there about a junior partner? Every time something unsavory happens, I catch hell at work. My parents are extremely disappointed in me and my only saving grace right now is you.”

I slipped my hands out of his and stood up. My mimosa had arrived to the table therefore I drank it down and put the fluted glass back on the table. “I think it’s best if I spent some time apart from you. I’m not breaking up with you because I love you so very much but I need to get my head straight and being around you isn’t going to help the situation. I hope you understand.”

Before he could say a word, I grabbed my purse and strolled out of the restaurant. I walked out of the hotel and the humid, Florida air hit me like a hot fan blowing in my face. I immediately began to sweat and walked toward the nearest taxi waiting for a pick up as something hit me hard in the face. I waved the bug away before it settled on my shoulder and I glanced over to see the biggest roach I’d ever witnessed in my life. It was a real live f*cking Palmetto bug!

I screamed bloody murder as I swatted it away and ran to the taxi before I hopped in and was greeted by the cool, refreshing environment only a working air conditioner could provide.

The driver looked over his shoulder and inquired, “Where to, Miss?”

“The Setai, please. I believe it is on Collins Avenue,” I responded in a hurried tone, still freaked out about the bug incident.

Funny, I was more freaked out about the Palmetto bug incident—the pounding of my heart in my chest proved as much—than I was about Paul. Some part of me felt I was being unfair to him and judging him for a situation that was well beyond his control. I knew this in my mind so why couldn’t I communicate this to my stubborn heart that wanted to feel broken and as if he’d shattered it into a million pieces? My heart was a f*cking drama queen I would leave in two shakes of a lamb’s tail if it were possible at all but it was as much a part of me as my mind and neither could seem to find symbiosis with one another.

I needed a second opinion and the person who could give it to me was less than five miles away from where I was staying. It seemed like a no brainer to me I should definitely consult Talia because if anyone knew about heartbreak, it was her.