The Battered Heiress Blues

14





We ordered a pizza for dinner and ate it down at the boathouse. Being there again brought back a heap of memories. The table still held melted candles and an empty bottle of champagne was turned over on the wooden planks below. I grabbed a few of the floor pillows from the back corner for us to sit on. Within ten minutes, I had eaten half of the pie, blaming it on the baby to make myself feel better. Mattie threw pieces of pepperoni to the fish, lying on his stomach with his head sticking off the dock to get the best view as they nibbled the morsels.

All I could think about, in this special place, was Henry. Well, Henry and now Tricia. Anger and jealousy seemed to go hand in hand. Tricia may indeed be the owner of a face that could shatter glass, but all I could imagine was Heidi Klum.

His jacket was still hanging on the hook above our invented bed. Walking over, I picked it up and held it to my nose. The smell of salt and fresh air had replaced his scent, but I put it on none the less, wrapping my arms around me, remembering his hold. Images played in my mind of our night together. The proposal seemed like just yesterday, but months had passed. When I relaxed into those distant thoughts, the sound of that horrid woman laughing over the phone invaded my mind. In my heart, I knew that Henry had crossed the line. Reality began to set in. Things were different now. The jacket slid down my arms and fell to the floor.

I gathered Mattie and we made our way home, using the old jars I’d found in the boathouse to catch the fireflies that lit the tree lined path. The day had been emotionally exhausting. After a quick bath for Mattie and a phone call to Tommy, we collapsed under the multiple layers of linens on my bed. We watched an animated movie he had chosen from my brother’s old video collection. My eyes were as heavy as Mattie’s as we both struggled to keep them open. I knew we’d never be able to stay up long enough to greet Gabe’s mom. The house seemed cold. I tucked us in tight, just leaving our arms on top of the comforter. I placed my hand across Mattie’s chest and we surrendered to sleep.

I heard the door creak open, but felt too sleepy to become alert enough to get up. I felt an arm over my waist, but the weight of it was too heavy to be Mattie. Slowly opening my eyes, I saw Gabe’s face close to my own. Mattie was sandwiched between us. Gabe was still asleep. He probably lay down for a second, with the intention of carrying Mattie to the guest room, as he had always done before, but fell asleep instead. Startling him by moving his arm off my waist would wake Mattie.

Suddenly, I realized that I’d forgotten about Gabe’s mom. The creaking of the door with Ms. Martin’s expected arrival made me realize that she was here. I was thankful. In my tired state, moving her boys seemed like a big task. We’d have to get them situated before I could get her settled into a room for the night.

I carefully turned my head toward the door and surprise claimed every muscle in my face. In the doorway, Henry and Kate stood, mouths open, bewildered by the scene they were taking in. Kate looked furious and disappeared from sight. Henry stood a little longer with the most hurtful expression on his face. I didn’t move. I couldn’t say anything. He finally relinquished his stare and left. If I followed him, he’d know that I was pregnant. One embrace would divulge my secret. If I didn’t go after them, I knew I was destined to lose them both.

The front door echoed its slamming throughout the house followed by the sound of two car doors shutting. Gabe and Mattie didn’t flinch. My head retreated down to the pillow and silent tears wet my face. My decision was made without careful consideration, but with no remorse. Depression had become a fertile breeding ground over the past several months in which to cultivate my new apathy.

Two hours passed before Gabe’s mom knocked on the front door. I was awake for every second replaying the events of the night. Had I made the right decision? My answer to that question changed continuously. The knocking intensified, even though I was sure that the front door was open. Henry and Kate left in such a hurry that they certainly didn’t waste even a second locking the door as they departed. I nudged Gabe. Opening his eyes, he realized that he was holding me and apologized while instantly removing his arm from my waist.

“I seem to be accosting you today. Sorry.”

“No worries. I think your mom is here. It sounds like someone is knocking at the front door.”

“What time is it?”

“Almost midnight.”

“I’ll move Mattie into the guest room.”

“You’ll wake him. It’s fine. Leave him here with me for the night.”

He sat up and ran his fingers through his hair, trying to wake up, before standing and leaving the bedroom. Reaching for the remote, I turned off the television which had illuminated the room. I sat up and pulled the covers off my side, stumbling to the bathroom in the dark. I waited until the door was closed to turn on the light so I wouldn’t wake Mattie. It took a moment for my eyes to adjust. Turning on the faucet, I leaned down and splashed my face with cold water. When I stood upright, the reflection in the mirror scared me. My white gown was stained red. I decided that I wasn’t actively bleeding, wasn’t in pain, and I wasn’t cramping. I needed to be calm and think.

Obviously, I needed to go to the hospital. After showering off and changing clothes, I called Dr. Brandon who told me that he’d meet me there. I’d thought about calling Tommy, but I really had no news to share until I was examined. While I was deciding what to do, a knock interrupted my thoughts.

“Julia, are you okay? I thought you were coming down to greet my mom.”

I opened the door. Worry must have consumed my face. Gabe stepped toward me and took my arms in his hands.

“What’s wrong?”

“Can I trust you?”

“You know you can.”

“No. I mean really trust you to keep my secrets. I hate to ask you to be my confidant because it means jeopardizing your relationship with Kate; which is already tenuous.”

“Julia. Kate was a dream- an awakening. You’ve become my family. My allegiance is to you. Your secrets are safe with me. I promise you that.”

“Could you drive me to the hospital?”

“The hospital…? Why? What’s the matter?”

“I’ve been bleeding. I’m not hurting at all, but I’m bleeding.”

He turned off the bathroom light as he pulled me into the bedroom and toward the door.

“Of course. Let’s go now. Mom can stay with Mattie.”

“What will we tell her?”

“You can trust my mom, Julia. She’s not too thrilled with Kate or Henry for that matter. We’ve adopted you. You’re part of our family whether you want to be or not.”

I smirked.

“Did you call the doctor?”

“He’s expecting us. He told me not to worry. I hate when they say that…spoken like a man who has never had a baby growing inside him.”

“Hey tiger, relax with the male bashing. Let’s focus on getting you to the hospital quickly.”

“Sirens?”

“You bet.”

We made our way downstairs and told Ms. Martin what had happened. She hugged me tightly and reminded me not to borrow trouble. Who was she kidding? Trouble always found me. I tried to keep a positive outlook for the baby’s sake and was comforted that I wasn’t hurting and the bleeding had stopped. Somehow, I figured pain would come with a miscarriage. I would be starting my third trimester soon and anyway, I felt fine.

Gabe pulled up to the emergency department and insisted on getting a wheelchair which I dismissed as ridiculous. When he disappeared into the hospital, I simply got out of the vehicle and started walking on my own. I managed to clear the sliding doors before he rolled up with the chair. His look said it all. I think he’d grown accustom to my stubborn nature. He pointed to the chair and insisted that I comply with his request. I shot him my best annoyed smile and conceded to his wishes. The nurse triaged me and took me back straight away. Gabe asked if I wanted him to remain in the waiting room, but I didn’t want to go through everything alone so he willingly accompanied me.

We waited for Dr. Brandon who arrived shortly after us. He reiterated that I shouldn’t panic and asked whether I wanted Gabe to stay for the ultrasound. I grabbed Gabe’s hand and told him to proceed with the scan. The baby’s heart was strong. We smiled at each other as the thumping sound filled the room.

“Your baby girl looks strong,” said Dr. Brandon.

“A girl,” I said delighted, squeezing Gabe’s hand tighter.

“Sorry. I forgot that you wanted it to be a surprise. It’s the late hour,” he offered apologetically.

“Why am I bleeding then?”

Dr. Brandon pushed the machine away as the nurse cleaned the gel off my abdomen. He looked serious. He looked like a killjoy- the deliverer of bad news. I wouldn’t allow my fears to trespass on this happiness. My baby girl was alive and well.

“We need to talk about something. A complication has developed.”

“What are you saying? You said she was strong. That’s why my appointments have been less often.”

“She is. I’m worried about you.”

“What does that mean?” Gabe said as he sat on the bed next to me, putting his arm around my back.

“You’ve developed a complete placenta previa. Typically, we wait to diagnose a previa, hoping that the placenta will continue to migrate up towards the fundus of the uterus, with the progression of the pregnancy, but that hasn’t happened in your case.”

“English, please.”

“Your placenta is completely covering the cervix.”

“That’s bad, then?” Gabe inquired.

“Having a vaginal delivery would be life threatening. You’ll need a C-section.”

“What did I do wrong?”

“Nothing, Julia. Your previous uterine surgery made you more susceptible to a situation like this. Your bleeding was the best possible thing that could have happened- it revealed the previa. If you went into labor on your own, the outcome would be poor. We know what we’re up against now.”

“What do I do?”

“The best case scenario would be to get you to thirty-eight weeks, but I’d be thrilled with thirty-six. We’ll be doing more ultrasounds. I’m concerned about intrauterine growth retardation which is just a fancy term for the baby’s growth lagging behind. The tech will do a biophysical profile each time you come for a scan. As far as you’re concerned, you’ll be on strict bed rest for now. That means that you can do limited walking to the bathroom and around the house, but no more. I’d like you to limit the time that you’re out of bed. As long as the baby is doing well, I won’t order complete bed rest at the hospital.”

“You might as well order complete bed rest, doc.” Gabe knew me too well.

“Very funny,” I shot back.

“I’m serious Julia. You have to do your part. Keep your stress level low. Take your blood pressure every day. As we get closer, I’ll use steroids to help mature her lungs. You’ll require a planned C-section and perhaps a transfusion.”

“And? There’s more. I can tell by your facial expressions that gloom and doom is on its way.”

“And… I must also tell you that a hysterectomy is a distinct possibility, given the complexity of your current situation and past uterine surgery. I won’t know until I open you up and see where we’re at. I just want you to be prepared.”

“Deliver my daughter in good health and I don’t care Dr. Brandon.”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it, but for now, strict bed rest. Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“Tonight was a saving grace. Go home and get to bed.”

“A saving grace,” I repeated. “I’m a lucky girl.”

“Bed,” Dr. Brandon reiterated.

“I will. Thank you for coming.”

“No problem. I’ll have my nurse call to schedule a follow up appointment. No driving, either.”

“I’ll get her there,” Gabe firmly stated.

“Then I’ll see you both in a week,” he replied as he exited the room.

My head fell on Gabe’s shoulder as he hugged me. A nurse interrupted us to take a final set of vital signs and give me my discharge papers. Gabe left to get the car as the nurse wheeled me to the emergency department entrance. I sat there thinking about what Dr. Brandon had said. Maybe this was a good thing. We were prepared now and could protect her. Bed rest was destined to get on my very last nerve, but I’d do anything to save her. I was never given that chance with Connor. This time, I had more control.

Gabe played the cheerleader during our trip back to the house, telling me that everything was going to be okay and reminding me how strong her heart was beating. I didn’t share his enthusiastic attitude, but I was happy that this was a treatable condition. Gabe had called his mom to let her know that we were on our way home. She was waiting on the veranda as we drove up, opening the door as the car stopped.

“Let’s get you inside and up to bed. I moved Mattie to another room in case you couldn’t sleep and wanted to watch some television.”

“That was sweet of you.”

“I made some chicken soup.”

“I’ll bring it up,” Gabe said as he walked toward the kitchen. “Help her get her pajamas on, Mom.”

“I will. Take your time on the steps, Julia.”

“You all are going to kill me with kindness.”

“Don’t be silly,” she responded.

“No, really. You have to stop doting over me. We need to talk business.”

We climbed the steps slowly; more so than necessary, but I was trying to placate the help. Gabe’s mom had been a registered nurse her entire life and had only recently retired last year. She was still filling in some shifts at the hospital to supplement her income.

“What kind of business?” she asked.

“How would you feel about moving in here and taking care of me and then the baby until I’m back on my feet? I have to hire a nurse anyway so I’d rather hire you.”

“It would be my pleasure to help you, Julia, you know that, but I couldn’t accept money.”

“Why ever not? That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. If I’m going to pay someone anyway, why not you?”

“I’d feel uncomfortable being paid. I’ve grown to think of you as a daughter over these past months. You’ve done so much for Mattie. Taking care of you would be the least that I could do in return.”

We made our way into the bedroom, closing the door behind us so that I could change. Ms. Martin helped me into a pair of guest worthy pajamas that would be suitable for Gabe’s company. She tucked me into bed as our conversation continued.

“That’s bunk. I take care of Mattie because I love him. Gabe has become a great friend to me and I look up to you. I won’t shower you with money, I promise. I’ll pay the going hourly rate for a 40 hour week. No more. How does that sound? If you say no then I won’t hire anyone and I’ll be left to my own devices; which can only mean bad things for me with my stubbornness.”

“Well, when you put it like that, I have no choice but to accept your proposal.”

“Perfect. When can you start?”

Gabe walked through the door with a tray of food.

“Start what?” he asked.

“I’ve hired your mom to be my nursemaid or jailor depending on how you look at it.”

“Good. I’ll worry less,” he said.

“The only condition, Ms. Martin, is that you not sit around this house all day watching me like I’m a guppy in a fishbowl. You have to leave and do things with Mattie. I’m sure that Tommy will be torturing me with his company very soon.”

“Do you plan to tell anyone else?” Gabe inquired, with his mom elbowing him in his side to zip it.

“No. Do you all plan to tell anyone else?”

Two no’s were spoken in chorus. My secret seemed safe. Now, I would have to rely on my brother’s discretion. I was dreading the call that I knew I had to make. He’d never forgive me for keeping something like this from him and I wouldn’t dare hurt him. Gabe and his mom left the room to get settled in, closing the door behind them. I decided to call Tommy since I couldn’t sleep. Considering it was 3:45 AM, I knew he would be in bed, but I wanted to hear his voice. Tommy was always my rock.

“Hello?”

“Tommy?”

“Jewels? What’s wrong?”

“Why does something have to be wrong?”

“It’s 3:45 AM in the morning. What’s the matter?”

“Don’t freak out.”

“Nothing good ever comes from those words when you speak them.”

“It’s not altogether horrible news. I had to go to the hospital this evening. I was bleeding.”

“The baby?”

“She’s fine.”

“She?”

“Yes. Your niece is okay. I started bleeding, but it stopped.”

“What caused the bleeding?”

“I have a complete placenta previa.”

“A what?”

“My placenta grew over the cervix so the baby can’t be born in the traditional way. I’m on strict bed rest now. The doctor will deliver her by cesarean section once she’s at a viable age. We’re shooting for thirty six weeks.”

“Do you want me to hire some help for you?”

“No. Gabe’s mom is a registered nurse. She’s agreed to move in and help out until I get back on my feet.”

“I’ll be there tomorrow.”

“That’s not necessary. I’ll be bed-ridden for several weeks. You have plenty of time to sit and stare at me.”

“I’m coming.”

“Whatever- just don’t be dramatic. I’m going to be fine. You should wait a few weeks. Ms. Martin will probably need a break from me by then. You know that I don’t make a good patient.”

“Truer words have never been spoken.”

“You’re hilarious. Your talent is wasted on us sinners.”

“So I’ll come in two weeks?”

“How can you possibly get away at Christmas?”

“You let me worry about me. You have enough on your plate; what with having a child out of wedlock and complications to boot.”

“Nice. You’ll be getting coal for sure.”

“All I want for the holidays is for you to abide by Dr. Brandon’s orders. I’m scared, Julia.”

“I’ll be fine. Cover me with prayer. I’ll do my part. You have my word.”

“I’ll hold you to it.”

“Understood. Will you bring some things from my apartment?”

“Sure. What?”

“I had asked Henry to get rid of Connor’s things, but I doubt he followed through on that. If the blankets and toys are left, will you bring them for Emma Grace?”

“Emma Grace?”

“It was good enough for Mom and Ms. Walker. She’ll have their same strength.”

“Mom would be thrilled. I love it, sis.”

“I’m glad.”

“Have you told Henry?” he timidly asked.

“No. I don’t plan to tell him either. The doctor wants me to keep my stress level to a bare minimum. Arguing with Henry would be counterproductive. I will tell him…at some point. I’m not ready.”

“What about John?”

“Father could care less, Tommy.”

“Don’t speak for him, Julia. He would want to know. Mom would want you to tell him.”

“Oh, God in heaven, spare me the turn the other cheek sermon at this late hour. Maybe you’re right. I’ll think about it. Now, you should get back to sleep.”

“You’re really okay then. You’ve told me everything?”

“Yes. Don’t be so paranoid.”

“Don’t be so you.”

“I’ll try. Love you.”

“Love you too. Goodnight.”

With that farewell, I decided to try some of the soup that had cooled off. No one could cook like Ms. Martin. As I finished, Gabe stopped by my room to tell me that he had called in for work. He was going to Tybee Island to pick up some of his mom’s belongings for the duration of her stay. I thanked him profusely for his friendship and with that I collapsed and fell asleep.