Shadow in Serenity

forty-one


Jason was pensive as their plane left the runway later that day. “Mom?”

She glanced at him, smiling at the headset that was too big for his head. “Can I call Logan when we get home, and tell him we’re back?”

Carny hadn’t spoken of Logan to Jason since they’d left Serenity, and for a moment, she pretended to be intent on flying the plane.

“Mom?”

“No, honey,” she said finally. “Logan … Logan is gone. He went to Dallas the morning we left.”

He gaped at her. “When’s he coming back?”

“I don’t know.” She struggled to find the right words. “It’s kind of like the carnival, Jason. The magic comes first —”

“Logan’s not like that.”

She bit her lip, wishing she could tell him he was right. But she wouldn’t lie to him. “He is, baby. He’s just like that.”

“He’ll be back,” Jason said. “He has to. He’s my friend.”

Carny didn’t answer, and again, Jason waited. Tears came to her eyes. “Honey,” Carny said, “we may not see Logan again.”

He caught his breath, and when she looked at him, she saw anger rather than surprise. “But what about the park?”

“There are things you don’t know about Logan. He hasn’t been honest about everything.”

“No!” He screamed the word into his microphone, almost bursting her eardrums. She’d never seen more rage on her son’s face. Not even the night he ran away. “That’s not true! Logan wasn’t lying. He’ll be back! You’ll see!”

Swallowing the knot in her throat, she didn’t answer.

She watched as Jason looked out the window, hiding the tears pushing into his eyes. When she reached over to touch his hand, he jerked it away.

“You still think he lies,” he said into the mike bent in front of his mouth. “After all he’s done!”

“Jason —”

“Well, he doesn’t!” he shouted. “You’ll see. Logan’s gonna do everything he promised!”

For the rest of the trip, Jason cried quietly in his seat, staring out his window. Carny couldn’t seem to fight her own tears, and by the time they landed, she was exhausted from the tension in the plane.

When they finally pulled onto the tarmac at Carny’s hangar, she touched his arm. “Jason, you know I love you, and I would have done anything to keep you from getting hurt. I’m so sorry.”

“You’re wrong, Mom,” he said. “I know you are.”

The moment she killed the engine and the propeller stopped turning, Jason was out the door, running to their truck.

The Texas sun was directly overhead as Carny reached her house. The grass had grown taller than she liked it, since she hadn’t mowed it before she left. Next door, she saw Janice out working in her garden. When Janice saw Carny, she abandoned her rake and walked across the empty lot between them. Before she’d even gotten out of the truck, Janice called through the window, “Carny, where have you been? I’ve been worried about you.”

Carny slipped out of the truck. “We went to see my folks. I’m sorry you were worried, but I left J.R. and Bev a note.”

She pulled their suitcases out of the back of the truck. She wanted to ask Janice if she’d heard anything from Logan, but she wouldn’t let herself, not in front of Jason.

Handing the smaller suitcase to her brooding son, she said, “Take your stuff in, Jason, and I’ll call J.R. and Bev to let them know we’re back.”

“Then I’m going to Nathan’s.” Jerking up his bag, Jason took it into the house.

“Go ahead and call them,” Janice said, breaking into a soft smile. “Then come over and I’ll update you on things.” She started to walk away, then turned. “I’m so glad you’re back. We missed you.” Waving, she cut across the yard.

Carny got her suitcase and went into the house just as Jason shot back out. The curtains were still drawn and the lights were out, and it was hot, since she had turned the thermostat off before she’d left.

It was the first time since Carny had bought the house that she hadn’t been happy to come home to it.

She set the suitcase down in her living room and looked at the couch, where she’d held Logan and talked about Jesus.

What had Logan been thinking? That she was a fool?

Tears assaulted her again, and she slumped onto the couch. Taking a deep breath and sniffing back her tears, she grabbed the phone and punched out her in-laws’ number.

“Hello?”

“Bev, it’s me. We’re back.”

“Carny, why didn’t you call? And why didn’t you answer your phone?”

“I turned it off Sunday,” she said. “Guess I let the battery die after that. I really just didn’t want to talk.” Carny heard Jason’s shouts outside. She stood and looked out the window. He was running, with Nathan on his heels, heading home with a smile on his face the size of Texas.

“It just isn’t like you to go off like that,” Bev said. “Are your folks all right?”

“Yes, they’re fine. Uh … Bev, let me call you right back, okay?”

“Carny, I have things to tell you!”

“In just a minute,” Carny said.

Hanging up the phone, Carny hurried to the door and caught Jason as he burst in. “Jason, what is it?”

“Mom! It’s started! I told you it would!”

“What has?”

“The park!” He tried to catch his breath. “Nathan said there were bulldozers and cranes, and they’re clearing all the land!”

“What?” She turned to Nathan, who looked ready to burst. “Nathan, that can’t be. Logan left town.”

“Yeah, to get more money,” Nathan said. “Now Logan’s got all the money he needs. Our money, and the bankers’, and some other people he got. It’s gonna be so great! My dad took me out there to see the work this morning. They’ve been working for three days.”

Carny felt the blood draining from her face. “Are you sure?”

“Positive. Dad said they’re clearing all the trees, but the ground-cutting ceremony is next week.”

“Ground-cutting? You mean groundbreaking?”

“Yeah, that. The governor is coming and everything!”

She brought her hand to her forehead and released a shaky breath. “This is unbelievable.”

“I told you, Mom! I told you!”

“Get in the truck, Jason,” she said, grabbing her keys. “We’re going to see.”

“All right!”

Nathan called home to tell his mom he was going with them, and they climbed into the truck. Carny screeched out of her driveway and drove toward the site.

“Isn’t it great, Mom? Logan did just what he said he’d do. Now aren’t you sorry for what you —”

“Jason, please!” she snapped. “Just … just let me think for a minute. I have to think.”

Jason got quiet, and Carny tried to sort out the thoughts spinning through her mind. If what Nathan said was true, then Logan was going ahead with the plans. And that must mean that he’d decided to keep hiding the truth from Serenity. But maybe he really was making good on his promise to build the park. He wouldn’t have spent money on land and excavation if he wasn’t.

On the other hand, the failure to honor his commitment to come clean spoke volumes. But maybe …

No. She couldn’t entertain the maybes. There were too many of them. The town could be operating on assumptions, clearing trees on faith. She drove up the highway until she neared the site, then slowed down.

“Mom! Hurry up!”

Swallowing, she forced herself to step on the accelerator again. And as they passed a cluster of trees, she held her breath.

“Mom, look! A bulldozer!”

Jason began bouncing on the seat, and Carny brought her hand to her mouth. Across the horizon, she saw bulldozers and bush hogs and other machinery clearing the land. Teams of men worked across the site. “This can’t be!” she whispered, pulling the car onto the shoulder.

“I told you, Mom! I told you!”

“But … where’s Logan?”

Jason and Nathan jumped out of the truck. Slowly, Carny got out too. A man with a hard hat and a clipboard stood near them, talking into a walkie-talkie. “Excuse me,” she said. “Who do you work for?”

The man took off his hat and wiped his tanned face with the back of his arm. “King Enterprises and the town of Serenity, ma’am. We’re clearing for the amusement park.”

Still amazed, Carny looked around. “Are you sure? I mean … did they pay you? With money?”

The man set the hat back on his head and laughed. “Well, I sure wouldn’t be out here in this heat if he hadn’t paid a good portion, lady. And MidSouth of Houston and the FSB of Dallas guaranteed the rest. That’s good enough for me, ma’am — I’ve done a lot of work for them before.” He looked her over, then glanced back at her truck. “Are you from the zoning board?”

Her breath seemed to come harder, her brain spun with possibilities, and her heart hammered … but whether it was with hope or dread, she wasn’t sure. “No. Uh … where is Mr. Brisco?”

“Last I heard he was in Dallas. But he’s supposed to be flying in sometime today. We have a meeting at three, so it’ll have to be pretty soon now.”

The fragile hope growing in Carny’s heart frightened her as she took the jubilant boys back to Nathan’s. She found Janice sweeping her back porch. “Janice, I don’t understand why they started clearing the land so soon. What happened?”

Janice leaned the broom against the wall. “Logan called a town meeting Monday night and showed up with Eric Hart. Eric gave a small concert, then told us he was going to partner with us on the park. They actually chose Serenity!”

So it was going to happen. The park was going to be built. And Logan was going to withhold the truth to make it happen. Did he really think that she —?

“I know you’re still worried, Carny. We all know you were right about him.”

“Wait. What?”

“After the concert, when Eric left, Logan told us the truth.”

Carny narrowed her eyes. “What truth?”

“That he really came here to con us.”

Carny almost choked. “He told you that?”

“Yes. He said he fell in love with the town and God got hold of him. He asked our forgiveness.”

Carny was dizzy. She reached for a patio chair to steady herself. “He really did that?”

“He did. He had all our cash separated into envelopes and offered to return it to anyone who asked. Some people took their investments back. But the rest of us forgave him and decided to trust him. After all, he didn’t have to tell us. People change. We’ve seen that happen in you, so we knew it could be done. If God can forgive, then we should, too, right? We’re setting up a corporation called Serenity Trust, so we’ll be partners with the other investors. It’s really happening, Carny.”

Carny couldn’t think. Could it be true? Leaving Jason with Janice, she ran back to her truck and headed for the airstrip. As she drove, she had the dizzying feeling of teetering on the edge of a cliff, waiting to fall off with the slightest breeze. Her heart pounded and her adrenaline surged.

The airport was quiet when she got there, and she went straight to the radio and sat in front of it, wondering who would be flying him in.

“Serenity ground, King Air Zero-Niner Bravo. Anybody there?”

Carny attacked the radio mike. “Serenity to zero-niner Bravo. Who is this?”

She heard a loud whoop. “Carny, is that you? You’re back?”

“Brisco?”

“Oh, thank you, God.” She heard a long pause, then, “Carny, why did you take off like that? Why haven’t you been answering your phone? Didn’t you get my messages?”

She slapped her hands over her face, then grabbed the mike again. “I got one … part of it. It made me mad so I deleted it. I thought you reneged.”

Again, a long pause. “I thought you trusted me.”

“I did, until you skipped town!” She carried the mike toward the window, until the cord pulled her back. “Where are you, Brisco?”

“About fifteen miles southeast of Serenity,” he said. “Which runway are we using?”

“Runway one-eight,” she told him. She let go of the mike, went to the window, and looked southeast. She couldn’t see him yet. Not sure whether to laugh or cry, she went back to the mike. “Serenity to … whoever you are.”

She heard him chuckling. “King Air Zero-niner Bravo.”

“What did you do? Steal a jet?”

“I’m in Eric Hart’s plane,” he said. “He’s in big, Carny. All the way in. We’re calling the park Hartland.”

She laughed and shook her head. “I heard.”

“I have a lot to tell you. Are you ready to talk me down? I’m still not sure about these landings.”

Collapsing back in her seat, Carny wiped her eyes. Then it occurred to her what he’d said. “Tell me you’re not alone in that plane, Brisco.”

“Except for Jack,” he said. “For some reason, Eric’s under the impression that I’m a longtime pilot. So he loaned me the plane for a few days. Only thing is … I forgot to tell him my landings are a little shaky, and I haven’t yet gotten my pap er work.”

Her chest locked. “Are you scamming me again?”

He laughed. “Just a little. I’m with Eric’s pilot, who’s also a certified instructor. We’re completely legit. So what do you think?” he asked. “Fifty bucks says I can land this pup as smooth as butter.”

“No bet, Logan,” she said. “You’ve been flying by the seat of your pants all your life. Something tells me you’ll land the plane just fine.”

She heard him laughing across the radio waves, and hurrying outside, she watched his approach. He had landed smoothly the last few times they’d flown, and she was confident that he could do it. Logan could pull off anything.

It was as if he’d done it a thousand times, and as he came in with the finesse of a veteran pilot, she put her hands on her hips and waited.

Tears flooded her eyes again. Idly, she wondered if she’d ever again be that stoic, free spirit who never cried. So much had changed since Logan blew into her life. She watched him taxi back up her small runway and pull onto the tarmac, and as she wiped her tears, she gave in to the relief and unadulterated joy merging in her heart now. He was here. She could hardly breathe as the plane came to a stop and he opened the door and stepped toward her. Then she couldn’t stand still any longer. She broke into a run as he came toward her, and soon he was running too, his face a fragile mask of new, unexplained emotions. He swept her into his arms as they met and crushed her against him.

“Man, you scared me,” he said in a fierce whisper. “What if I’d never seen you again?”

She pulled out of his arms and hit his chest. “You left without a word! Just took off! What was I supposed to think? You couldn’t have any meetings with bankers on a Sunday, and you hadn’t mentioned going the night before. You were going to confess to the church, but you didn’t. And you checked out of the motel!” She hit him again.

He grabbed her hands to protect himself. “I called you from the road around one that afternoon, after I knew you were home from church. But you were gone, and nobody knew where you were.”

“Doc told me —”

“Let me explain. I couldn’t sleep that night, Carny, and about four in the morning I got a call from Eric Hart. He said he wanted to see me. He was in Dallas doing a charity concert the night before, and he hadn’t gone to bed. He’d been thinking about the park. He asked me to come meet with him before he left for Nashville. And I knew that if I presented his commitment to the town before I confessed, they’d be more likely to believe that I could really do this. I didn’t want to wake you up and get you to fly me there on a second’s notice, especially with Jason asleep and everything, so I rushed to the Odessa airport and caught the first plane out. But I wouldn’t have gone if I’d known you’d think I skipped out on my promises. You could have called.”

“I was furious! I didn’t want to talk to you. I thought all the God talk was just a farce.” Closing her eyes, she leaned her forehead against his chest. All that grief. All that misery. All that soul-searching. And all because she had been so sure he was going to let her down.

“You know, Carny, you’re not the only one God can change and make it stick.”

She saw the other pilot getting out of the plane, saw Jack bounding down the steps. Before she could answer, Logan kissed her, a desperate, ravenous kiss salty with her tears.

When he pulled back, he whispered, “There’s so much I have to tell you.”

She grabbed fistfuls of his shirt. “Tell me now.”

Wiping her wet cheek with his thumb, he said, “Well, let’s start with my fear that I couldn’t be the kind of person who wasn’t fighting God or conning His people. The past is so powerful, Carny, and when nothing’s ever come easy except a scam … when the only person who ever cared was a grifter himself … when the only accomplishments that amounted to anything were the stings we pulled …”

“You start thinking that’s who you are, who you’ll always be,” she whispered. “I know. I’ve been there.”

“And shaking that life loose is the riskiest thing I’ve ever done. It’s scarier than sneaking out of town with a lynch mob on my tail. It’s scarier than having your best friend die on you.”

His gaze was soft and honest as she stared at him.

His eyes misted over. “But I’ve really been cleansed. And all of a sudden, the most important thing in the world to me is being the kind of man who pleases God. And God cleared the way, Carny. He gave the towns people forgiving hearts. They didn’t run me out of town. But I never meant to let you down. Funny thing is, when I let people down, it’s usually planned. This is the first time I’ve been so desperate not to, and it happened anyway.

“But then I decided that you’d have to come back eventually, and when you did, I’d be here, and I’d spend the rest of my life proving to you that I was different. Even if you didn’t want me here, I’d stay, Carny. Because I can do this. I can bring Serenity back with this park. I can make something out of all this. And maybe not now, but someday, God will smile down on me and make you love me.”

“It’s too late,” she whispered as tears streamed down her face.

For a moment, he only gave her a dismal, longing look. “Are you sure, Carny?”

She smiled through her tears. “Yeah, Brisco. Someday is now. It’s a done deal.”

He threw his arms around her then, burying his face against her neck, and held her so tight that he lifted her off the ground.

“I don’t suppose you would marry me,” he said as he set her down.

“Oh, I might be persuaded,” she said through tears, “if you asked at the right time and place.”

He set her down and touched her face. “And what would that time and place be?”

“Anytime, anyplace,” she said.

Laughing, he kissed her as Jack barked up at them.


Logan used his persuasive talents to talk Hugh Berkstrom into throwing the wedding reception of the century on the back lawn of his estate, after they were pronounced man and wife at the Deep Waters Christian Church, where Logan had been baptized the week before.

Carny’s parents wasted no time cornering Logan at the reception and trying to sell him on their own plan to set up a string of games at the back end of the park. “And if you’ll listen to me, son,” Dooley said, “I can give you a thousand ideas on how to turn a profit in other ways. We really need to talk.”

Logan nodded toward Carny, who was dancing with Jason across the room. “You’ll have to talk to my bride,” he said. “The town just appointed her park commissioner. She’s going to be in charge of keeping Hartland clean and legitimate. And she’ll even have to clear the new hirees … you know, just to make sure that everything’s kept aboveboard.”

Lila’s face fell. “She won’t have time for that. Not with the airport expanding.”

“Oh, Carny can handle a lot more than you think.”

“But she don’t trust anybody,” her father said. “If you leave it up to her, the only people who get hired will be inexperienced townies who don’t have a clue how to make a bu ck.”

“We’ll have some good, wholesome, decent people working in Hartland,” Logan said. “There’s nobody better qualified to do this job, or more passionate about doing it right. She’s fair,” he added with a chuckle. “Submit your proposals to her. She’ll let you know.”

Dooley and Lila were crestfallen as he walked away. He saw Ruth sitting in her golf cart, watching Carny and Jason dance, with a brilliant smile on her face. Strolling toward her, he followed her gaze. “She’s really beautiful, isn’t she, Ruth?”

“She’s stunning,” Ruth said. “You’d better be good to my baby, Logan.”

“Don’t worry, Ruth. I’ll spend the rest of my life making her happy.”

Ruth took his hand and patted it. “Somehow I think you will.”

Jason left his mom to run off with Nathan. Cutting through the dancers, Logan took his wife in his arms. “Have time for a dance with your groom?” he asked.

“Of course.” She laughed. “So what were my parents talking to you about?”

“Working for the park. I referred them to you.”

“No wonder they looked so upset. They know they don’t stand a chance with me.”

Logan caught sight of Dooley across the lawn, animated as he talked to a group of guests who’d gathered around him. “Tell me something. Does your father make bets on card tricks?”

“Only if they’re rigged.”

“Well, he’s liable to make a fortune at this reception.”

Carny looked over her shoulder and saw him engaging in the same tricks he’d used for years. “Oh, no. He never quits. We’d better break up the reception before he cleans everybody out.”

They left for their honeymoon in Carny’s truck — decorated with shaving cream, toilet paper, and tin cans — and headed for the airstrip, where earlier Logan had filled Carny’s plane with white roses.

“Nassau, here we come!” Logan said, carrying her, wedding dress and all, to the plane. “Imagine Serenity raising the honeymoon money as our wedding gift. And I didn’t con a single one of them.”

“No, you didn’t,” she said, “Do you realize why they did it? They did it for you. With the pace you’ve been keeping, they were afraid you’d collapse before the park is finished.”

“Oh, I have plenty of energy,” he said. “And rest is the last thing I’ve planned for our honeymoon.”

She laughed as he put her into her seat and dropped a handful of white rose petals into her lap. Breathing the aroma of the roses, she closed her eyes and smiled. Logan went down the pre-flight checklist, as she had taught him, then they took off into the sunny sky. “So what exactly are we going to do in Nassau?”

A wicked grin crept across his face. “Oh, I don’t know. I hear there’s a lot of money there, Carny. Montague always had this dream of hitting that place. And I had this great idea —”

“Don’t even think about it.”

Throwing back his head, he laughed. “Had you going for a minute, didn’t I?”

She leaned closer to him and grinned up into his face. “I can see right through you, Logan Brisco. You know that, don’t you?”

“And you married me anyway. Whoever said you can’t con a con?”