Lost in Distraction

Chapter Three



It has been a week since I met the mysterious Braxton James.

There is something about him that makes my mind twist, my stomach turn, and my cheeks blush—all at the same time. I hope I figure it out soon because he has become very distracting and I don’t need distractions. I need to focus on finishing college and starting my predestined life.

I’m meeting him today to work on our joint economics assignment. I grab my books and do a last minute check in the mirror. For someone who doesn’t care what other people think, I seem to be making an extra effort to look good today. My hair is half pinned up with the other half left down, curling down my back. I even put some tinted moisturizer on, a quick swipe of mascara and a little lip gloss to finish off the look. I haven’t felt like making an effort in recent years. I’ve been so wrapped up in my own little bubble that I really didn’t see the point, but today I want to make the effort. I want to see if I can affect Brax as much as he affects me.

I’m nervous. I haven’t felt like this since I was fifteen. Before the day my family…

I can’t think of them, not today. I need to be on my game. I don’t want to come across as a flustered little girl when I’m around him.

We’ve arranged to meet in the library where he’s booked a private study room for us. At first I was a bit hesitant when he sent me a text suggesting the place to meet, but I had to remind myself that I’ve been alone with Brax before and he didn’t try anything. He seems trustworthy, and the more I get to know him the more I feel that he is. It has been a long time since I’ve been able to trust anyone, especially a man.

Closing my door and locking it behind me, I look out the hallway window before heading towards the stairs and spot a black car parked opposite my building. I’ve never noticed it before. It’s not a busy street, so you get to know most of the neighbors and their cars, Seems weird that the guy is just sitting there not going anywhere. Shrugging it off, I head down the stairs and out the door towards the library to meet Brax.



I get a text from Shay telling me he thinks Elise may have spotted his car. Dammit, he knows not to park in the same place twice. Our Ford is inconspicuous enough, but I really didn’t think she’d notice it. I don’t want her to get suspicious, especially when she has just started opening up to me. I sense that she isn’t the paranoid type, but she is still guarded and shy. However, keeping her in the dark about what is going on is the best thing right now.

Elise and I have been texting each other during the week. Nothing too intense or probing, just general getting to know you stuff about my family, her old home town, and our favorite things. She likes drama and comedy movies, I like thrillers and horror. We both like rock music and both have dreams of traveling to Europe one day.

I told her that I used to be in the Army. I didn’t see the harm in her knowing that and it will help explain how I know Shay if they ever meet. I don’t want to lie to her any more than I have to. I don’t think I’ve raised any flags yet, and I hope it stays that way.

I find myself checking my phone when I’m waiting for her replies. I feel like a teenager. The feelings I have when I’m around her are telling me that I’m already too involved. My job is to get close to her so I can keep her safe, but I don’t think I’m going to be able to stop this from becoming personal.

When we left the army, Shay and I headed back to Atlanta where my adoptive father lived. He was fighting prostate cancer and I was the only family he had left. He died six months later and I needed a full time job to keep my childhood home. Soon we found ourselves working in the security business.

The past three years I’ve been so focused on working I haven’t had time for dating. Don’t get me wrong, there have been women, but they were only there for physical fulfillment. No one has piqued my interest enough to take it any further than sex.

Until Elise.

Her eyes feel like windows into my soul, instead of her own. I desperately want to get to know her. I already have an overwhelming desire to protect her, way beyond my professional responsibility.

This job is definitely not going the way I thought it would. I expected a quick intel check where we would advise Gibbons that she was safe and blissfully unaware of the unwanted attention, and then extract ourselves at a later date by dropping out and returning to Atlanta, but there is no way in hell I see myself being able to pull out anytime soon, especially after the updated information Gibbons gave me the other day. She’s in their sights now and I have to stop them. I have to make sure she remains untouched.

I open the library door and see her straight away, standing by the front desk with a leather satchel over her shoulder. She’s twirling her hair around her finger, looking nervous, and it makes me smile. I can’t wait to see the effect I can have on her today, to see what it takes to make her blush again. I walk over to her with a smile on my face and tap her shoulder. She turns with a start and a slow grin spreads over her face. “Hey, Braxton. I just got here too.”

Damn, something about the way she says my name just does things to me. “You can call me Brax if you want. It’s shorter and just rolls off your tongue,” I say with a smirk. I see her blush at my flirting. Damn, she’s cute when she blushes.

“Okay, Brax. You can call me Elle if you want. My dad used to…oh, shit.” She suddenly appears uncomfortable and stares at the ground.

Before I can stop myself, I lean in and quietly tell her, “It’s okay. You can talk about them, you know.”

She has alluded to her parents being gone in our text conversations, but she hasn’t told me outright what happened to them. Elise has said that they are no longer around and I haven’t let on that I know about the murders because that would blow my cover. I put my index finger under her chin and lift it upwards, bringing her eyes to mine. I take a moment to stare into her eyes; they amaze me more and more every time I see them. But looking at them now, full of unshed tears, breaks me.

“Seriously, it’s okay. I think I might just take you up on that offer and call you Elle. I like it. It suits you,” I say quietly so only she can hear.

“T-Thank you for n-not asking about it.” She’s stuttering a bit now, trying to get past her revelation that she obviously isn’t ready to share. “Shall we head on up and get started?” she asks, pointing to the stairs leading up to the private study rooms.

“Sounds good,” I reply as I place my hand on the small of her back to direct her up the stairs. I know I shouldn’t be touching her, but I can’t help it. My resolve to only concentrate on the job continues to falter the more time I spend with her and I don’t think I can stop now. I want to follow through with whatever this thing is that’s happening between us.

I just hope she is feeling it, too.



I can’t believe I brought up my dad in front of Brax. I’m horrified!

I haven’t told him about my past. As much as I try to block it out, it seems to be in the forefront of my mind lately.

I swear I stop breathing the moment that Brax puts his hand under my chin and lifts my face upwards; I have to swallow down the lump rising in my throat. He is being so sweet and hasn’t asked any awkward questions that I’m not ready to answer yet.

My heart melts when he says I don’t have to hide myself from him. I wish I could believe him, but I’m so used to shutting myself off from everyone and I don’t think I can change that habit just for him. I don’t want the sad looks from him. It would be far worse than anybody else.

If only I knew why.

After suggesting we head upstairs, I feel Brax place his hand on the small of my back. My whole body trembles when he touches me and I’m so embarrassed, I can feel my cheeks warming up. He must think I’m skittish, or that I didn’t like him touching me—but I definitely did. When he takes his hand away to open the door to the study room, I can still feel him there, like his touch has branded me.

This whole situation is unnerving. I’ve been strong for so long, keeping everyone out, then suddenly I meet a gorgeous guy and I turn into a timid little girl when he’s around. I think it is more than that, though. His touch feels warm, like my whole body is being heated. I’ve never felt that way with anyone before. He opens the door to the study room and ushers me through. I’m sure he is looking at my ass, but I don’t want to look back and check.

This is going to be a long couple of hours.



We spend most of the afternoon discussing the assignment and working on our presentation. She seems to have a genuine interest in Economics. I’m guessing it is her father’s influence.

“Did you see those fraternity pledges running naked through the middle of the quad this morning? That is hazing gone bad,” I say, trying to get Elle talking about anything non-economic.

“Yeah, it’s crazy. Who would put themselves through that?” she replies shaking her head. “I can’t imagine joining a sorority.”

“Aww c’mon, Elle. I’m sure you’d love to be publicly humiliated while you strive to belong,” I say sarcastically.

“Hell no! Never going to happen,” she retorts with a sly smile.

Damn. The look on her face makes me think of bad things, things I shouldn’t be thinking about right now. I’m enjoying just talking to her and little by little she is showing me a different side. It may be small steps, but I know it is a big thing for her.

I look up and watch her as she works every chance I get. She is so beautiful. Her skin is flawless and her features are so fine and feminine. Her mouth is perfectly curved, making me wonder what it would be like to kiss her. What makes her even more alluring is that I don’t think she has any idea of the effect she has on the people around her, in particular the males around campus, and especially me.

I start noticing her little mannerisms. Like how she breathes deeply and slowly when she’s thinking, but then starts fidgeting when her mind wanders. When she is frustrated or stumped, she bites the pad of her thumb between her front teeth. And she blushes...a lot. She almost catches me watching her, but I quickly look down at my work and grin when I see her sneaking glances my way. She is still a total enigma to me. Considering what I know about her family, her past and the fact that she’s being targeted by some dangerous people, you’d think I wouldn’t be attracted to her, but I find myself wanting to be near her all the time.

A knock on the door breaks our concentration and we both look up as one of our classmates comes in. “Hey, guys. Sorry to bother you, but your time is up.”

I glance down at my watch. “Oh, man. I can’t believe we’ve been in here for over three hours.”

Elle nods her head. “I guess we just lost track of time.”

I stare into her eyes and I know exactly why it is easy to lose track of time when I’m with her. She mesmerizes me, and she is a lot easier to talk to now that she is slowly letting her guard down.

Even if it is a little bit at a time.

I watch as she stands up and starts collecting her things. I don’t want to end my time with her yet, so thinking on my feet I come up with a plan. “Do you want to grab something to eat with me? Think of it as a reward for all the work we’ve done today.”

She seems a little taken aback by my invitation. “Um…sure, sounds good. But can we swing by my place and drop my stuff off?”

“Sure, that’s a great idea. Let’s go,” I reply, clearing my books away.

I stand and head for the door, waiting for Elle to join me. I wasn’t planning on sharing a meal with her tonight, but I want to get her talking again without the distraction of school work. I’m hoping she’ll open up to me and be completely honest. I want to know everything I can about the elusive Elle Halliwell.



I’m standing in my bathroom, trying to pull myself together.

When Brax asks me out for something to eat, I’m surprised. I’ll admit that I’m starving, but I’m surprised by his invitation. Maybe he heard my stomach rumbling and felt the need to feed me to shut it up.

I can’t work out why he is so interested in me. I’m aloof, standoffish, and to be honest, shut off. Why would anyone want to spend any longer than they had to with me? In my dark moments, I don’t even want to spend time with myself.

So now he’s in my living room and I’m in my bathroom, staring at myself in the mirror while trying to hold off a panic attack. I don’t invite people into my home, but I didn’t really think about it when I asked to drop by my apartment. It’s my sanctuary, my escape from the big bad world out there, and Brax is the first person I’ve ever allowed inside.

Looking at myself in the mirror, I think back to my past experiences with men. It has been limited to meaningless hookups while trying to make myself feel something again. I’ve learned that there are two types of men. The ones who are forward and go after what they want, and the ones that work slowly, gently pushing their way in and then striking while the iron is hot. Brax is obviously a believer in the latter. It has only been a week and we’ve already met up twice, texted, and now a meal. He comes across as someone who doesn’t want to miss an opportunity when it presents itself.

It’s not like he knows much about me. I could be some crazy psycho woman who has ten cats and a secret teaspoon collecting fetish. He could be a fugitive or a closet evangelist wanting to save my soul.

God, I hope not.

I sit down on the edge of my bathtub and put my head between my legs, trying to concentrate on slowing down my breathing. It’s only dinner for Christ’s sake, not a lifelong commitment. Pull yourself together, Elle. I quickly check my makeup and hair and wash my hands before heading towards the living room.

I walk through the hallway door. He’s staring out my window with a troubled look on his face. Maybe he has changed his mind about dinner or about being here with me.

“Brax?” I question quietly.

When he turns around, his eyes widen and I’m met with a look of shock that quickly grows into a wide grin. I’ve changed into a tight, short sleeved, red top, black skinny jean paired with my favorite black knee-high boots and finished off with a black bolero to cover my arms. As he looks me up and down, the look on his face turns into something more, his eyes are full of lust, bordering on hunger. He walks towards me holding out his hand and stares me straight in the eyes.

“Elle, you look stunning. I feel almost unworthy now.”

“You look good too, Brax.”

We just stand there, silently taking each other in, and my panic disappears. Suddenly I feel a blanket of calm surround me. This is surreal. I haven’t felt embraced like this since my family was alive. He breaks the spell.

“Let’s get you fed,” he says, lacing our fingers together in an intimate move that shocks me, but I don’t let it show as he moves me towards the front door. My hand feels so warm in his.

If this is what it feels like to get too close to the fire, I’m feeling more and more inclined to give myself up to the flame.



Halfway to our destination, I suddenly realize that I haven’t told Elle where we are going.

“You like pizza, right?”

“Of course. What college student doesn’t?” she retorts with a smile.

God, I love it when she smiles. It may not be a huge ‘light up the room’ grin, but seeing how she distances herself from everything, a small smile from her is a concession I’ll take anytime.

We arrive at the pizzeria and take a booth towards the back. I make sure I’m facing the door, back to the wall. It’s a habit that has been ingrained into me through my years of training, just like scanning the place automatically when we walk in.

I’m well aware that I’m seven years older than Elle, but thankfully she hasn’t shown any sign that our age difference bothers her. God, I hope it doesn’t. I’m trying to act a little younger, but I don’t want to pretend with Elle. She deserves more than that.

A waitress approaches our table. “Hi! I’m Tina, your waitress for the evening. What can I get you guys to drink?”

On autopilot I reply, “A beer,” wincing when I realize that Elle isn’t old enough to drink.

“I can drink a soda or something if it makes you uncomfortable?” I say to her.

She looks back at me, amused that I’m trying to be considerate. “It’s fine. I can be around alcohol, you know. Go ahead, old man,” she replies teasingly. I can’t help but raise an eyebrow at her sassiness. Another new side to her I haven’t seen before. She continues to surprise me with all her different layers.

“A soda and a beer. Do you know what you want to eat?” the waitress questions.

I nod my head at Elle. “It’s your pick.”

“Hmm, how about a pepperoni with extra cheese?”

Even though I should be keeping my carbs down, I nod in agreement. “Sounds good.”

“So, do you think we’re on the right track with the assignment?” I ask, trying to keep the conversation light and not overtly personal.

“Yeah I think we’ll ace it,” she says with a smile.

“Great. I couldn’t have done it without your help, that’s for sure. You seem like a natural at that kind of stuff.”

Her eyes widen at my praise, like she’s not used to hearing compliments. She stutters through a reply, “T-Thank you, but don’t underestimate yourself. I mean, you had some great ideas too.”

I can’t help but grin at her now. Cute and sweet, a gorgeous combination. I don’t know what it is about her tonight, but she seems a lot more relaxed in my company. I’m relieved and I’m finding myself thankful for more personal reasons than professional.

Eyes on the prize, Brax.

Our drinks arrive and I take a swig of the ice cold beer which goes down way too nicely. Sipping her cola, I catch her looking up at me through her lashes.

Damn, that’s hot. My mind wanders as I think about the way she could look while doing other things.

Removing her lips from her straw, she lifts her head. “Got any plans for the weekend?”

That breaks my train of thought and I can’t stop the grin creeping up my face. “Not really. Are you looking for something to do?” I hear her breath catch in her throat. She is so cute when she’s flustered. I know I’ve put her on the spot, but I really want her to make the next move.

“Um…I mean, I wasn’t…. uh, maybe,” she replies with a shy smile. “I mean, I don’t have any plans, but if you wanted to catch up, you know, to go over the assignment or something... I’m game.”

I can tell she’s in uncharted waters now, so I’m going to be gentle on her. I don’t want her pulling back, especially when she’s come so far in the last week. “Yeah, we could do that, or we could just hang out.” I can’t stop smiling at her reaction to this whole conversation.

“Yeah, okay. Sounds good,” she replies quietly. I swear I hear a sigh of relief when the pizza is placed on the table in front of us. Catching the aroma from the pizza, I realize how hungry I am. With everything going on, I haven’t eaten since this morning.

“Dig in, Elise, before I demolish this whole pizza and disgust you with my huge manly appetite,” I say, rubbing my stomach. The giggle she gives me is adorable, and I’d do anything to hear that again. I look up from my half-eaten slice and notice that her eyes have a new sparkle to them. They’re so unlike her file photo, her green eyes appear even more striking in person. I frown at myself. I’m in trouble here.

Rule of operations #1: Don’t get too close to the target.

Well that rule has been seriously broken and trampled on. So glad Gibbons and the boss are back in Georgia, that’s for sure.

She notices me frowning and asks, “Hey, are you all right?”

“Of course, babe. Sorry, just thinking that this pizza isn’t going to be big enough for the both of us.” I laugh but realize she’s not laughing with me. She’s staring at me. What did I say? Then I realize that I slipped and called her babe.

Shit!



He called me babe?

I tense up and peek up through my lashes at him. The look on his face is telling me that he just realized what he said.

He caught me off guard with his quick comeback about spending time with him on the weekend. I seriously wasn’t trying to push him into seeing me again and I was horrified that I could be so careless with my comment, but relaxed a bit when he said we should hang out. I’ve felt so comfortable tonight, a big change from this afternoon when I was so on edge around him. It still feels like I’m in uncharted waters, though. I’ve been shut off for so long and keeping away from people, especially males.

It’s not like it’s the best conversation starter. “By the way, my parents were murdered three years ago so I have no family. But don’t worry, I have a lot of money that I don’t know what to do with.”

Brax seems different, though. I can’t pinpoint what it is exactly, but he is making it so easy to let my guard down, it’s almost like he’s trying to knock it out with a sledge hammer. I wonder if it is a good thing because letting my guard down leaves me open to getting hurt again. What happens if we get close, but when he finds out about me and my past he can’t disappear fast enough?

I’d be alone and broken again.

But hearing him call me babe, I kind of like it. I could never admit that to him, though.

“Elle, are you okay?” Brax asks, snapping me out of my self-pitying monologue.

“Oh. Yeah, sorry, just thinking about something. It’s all good. Hey, we should get going. It’s late, and I don’t want to keep you.” I want to go back to my apartment now. Thinking about getting hurt again makes me feel like the walls are closing in again. I need the sanctuary that my home provides.

Brax seems taken aback by my need to leave. “Yeah, sure. Let me take care of the bill, and I’ll walk you home.” He stands and makes his way to the counter to pay for our meal. I breathe out a sigh of relief, knowing that I’ll be in back in my sanctuary soon. Back where I won’t have to watch what I say or do.

Brax comes back to the table and holds out his hand to me. I look up at him, and his returning smile melts away any uncertainty I have. I smile back at him as I grab my purse and put my hand in his. He laces our fingers together and leads me outside. We turn in the direction of my building and walk hand in hand down the sidewalk. The warm feeling is back and my unease has all but disappeared again.

It’s like his touch is my salve and to be completely honest, I’m liking it.



Stepping out of the restaurant, I do a quick check of the street. Nothing seems out of place or suspicious, but I can’t relax just yet. I’ll feel a lot better when we’re off the street and she’s back in the safety of her building. We’ve got a bug in her apartment now, for security in case Shay and I are engaged elsewhere. If anything out of the ordinary happens, it will raise an alarm back at headquarters and we’ll be paged or the police will be called immediately. I hated invading her privacy when we swept her apartment earlier in the week, but it is a necessary requirement of the job.

I know I’m distracted in my thoughts and Elle picks up on it. “Hey, are you alright? Sorry for losing track of time,” she says, getting my attention.

I look down at her and can’t help but smile. She’s tall for a woman, but still shorter than my six feet, two inches. Her heels probably help, too. Damn, those boots do killer things to her legs. They make them look long and sexy as hell.

“Yeah, ba…Elle, we’re all good. Let’s get you home and out of this cold,” I reply, putting my hand on her back as we walk towards the front door of her building. I feel a warmth radiate through my body whenever I touch her. It is amazing how a simple touch can do that.

When we are almost at her door, I spot Shay’s car parked a few houses down. I nod in his direction, our own signal which lets him know he’s off duty. Once I get home I’ll check in with him and see if he has anything to report, although I’m sure I would have heard by now if it wasn’t safe for her to return home. I’ll still feel better after a debrief. After opening the door and ushering Elle inside, we climb the two flights of stairs to the first floor and reach her apartment door. I’m suddenly feeling nervous. I haven’t felt this way in years.

What am I, a damn teenager?

She smiles then turns to put her key in the door, unlocking and opening the door. Just as she goes to open it, she pauses and turns back to me. She’s looking at my chest, like she is having a war of words in her head. Damn, there is that blush again.

I can’t resist touching her. I place my index finger under her chin and gently raise her face to mine. I slowly move in until I’m close enough to feel her breath on my face. Unable to stop myself, I cup her cheek with my hand. “Good night,” I whisper before I kiss her lips, gently parting them with my tongue. Her whole body stills as her lips and tongue start to follow my lead.

Deciding that I need to pull away before I lose all self-control, I open my eyes and end the rousing kiss. The expression on her face is so enticing and her sparkling green eyes are full of wonder. That was just…

I’m speechless.

I stare down at her, taking her all in. By the look on her face, I’m hoping she feels this too.

“Goodnight, Brax,” she whispers as I pull my hand away from her cheek.

“Goodnight, Elle,” I murmur back, kissing her on the cheek. With a huge smile on my face, I turn and walk away towards the stairs. I don’t look back for fear of losing all of my restraint. I can’t afford to lose control with her. There is too much at stake. Her safety, my job, whatever this is that is developing between us.



Oh my God. He kissed me.

He smelled like beer, pizza and mint. Such a heady combination, but he smelled delicious. It was so sweet and light and my whole mouth was tingling wherever he touched.

My first kiss with Brax and I’m literally ruined.

I quickly open my door and close it behind me. Leaning back against it, I try to calm my frazzled nerves. I shake my head. Damn that man. He has done something no one else has done for the past three years. He has made my heart beat again, made me feel something, and goddamn if I don’t want more of him. I walk towards my bedroom, turning off the lights with only one thing on my mind.

When can I kiss Brax again?