The Five Stages of Falling in Love

“I brought some of your mail. A few pieces got mixed up with mine. Thought you might need your water bill.” He waved a couple envelopes in front of him before setting them on the counter.

 

“Oh, wow, thank you! That would have been bad. My kids can eat peas and ketchup for dinner occasionally, but they cannot go without baths. They are surprisingly smelly.”

 

“I don’t think that’s surprising,” he countered seriously.

 

I laughed and watched Abby try to pencil in a mustache on Jace’s wiggling face. He was probably right about that one.

 

“Abby, be careful of his eyes!”

 

She squinted studiously at Jace’s upper lip. “I know, Mom!”

 

Turning back to Ben, I caught him looking at me, not Abby. “I thought you came over to talk about Emma!” I blurted when panic burst to life inside of me.

 

“Oh, no. Uh, I didn’t come over here to talk about that, or, uh, her.”

 

“She says you haven’t called her. I thought you said she was fun.”

 

His eyebrows bunched together. “I’ve called her. She’s called me too.”

 

“What? She told me you two hadn’t really talked since the first date.”

 

“Oh, right. Well, we haven’t been on a second date .Maybe that’s what she meant.”

 

I narrowed my eyes on the giant boy-man in my kitchen and realized he was a terrible liar. “Why not? You said she was fun!” I knew I was repeating myself, but I couldn’t help it. What was his deal with my sister?

 

He broke into an amused grin. “Yes, she was fun. But that was it. We had a good time. I knew that night I wasn’t going to ask her out again and I know she didn’t expect it to go any further either.”

 

“How do you know that?” My tone lashed out, a whip biting at the air around me. The rage monster had taken up residence under my skin again. I couldn’t stop my overreaction from happening even though I desperately wanted to.

 

“Because she told me.”

 

“She did not.” My hands gripped the counter top so tightly my knuckles turned white.

 

“Liz, she did.” His voice gentled. “Your sister is smart, funny and downright gorgeous. But she is not into me like you want her to be.”

 

I whirled around, unable to face him. His words spun around in my head, trying to land in one place long enough for me to make sense of them. But I couldn’t. Emma and Ben were perfect for each other. And even though he put this on her, like it was her decision, I couldn’t help but blame him.

 

I threw open the refrigerator again and yanked out the last of the milk. “Damn it,” I cursed as I poured just enough into four small cups.

 

“What’s the matter?” he stepped forward and took the empty milk carton from my hand.

 

“I need to go to the store.”

 

“I can see why that would make you angry.”

 

His teasing words only pissed me off. “Do you know what it’s like to go to the store with young kids, Ben? I don’t have the time! And I really don’t have the patience for the headache. And my sister is perfect for you!”

 

His big hand landed on my shoulder and turned me toward him. His other hand came next and directed my chin so that I had to look at him. His touch confused me in the worst ways. No man besides Grady had ever touched me like this. Not with this kind of command and intimacy.

 

I couldn’t pick one of my feelings out of my tumultuous head that would make sense. I couldn’t even figure out why Ben’s touch felt intimate or invasive. But the warmth of his skin seeped through my thin blouse and wrapped around my bones.

 

I hadn’t been touched by another man besides Grady, but I also hadn’t been touched by another man since Grady.

 

I missed human affection, a strong man’s touch. My body awoke in ways that had been dormant for a very long time, even before Grady had passed.

 

My brows furrowed and I pressed my lips together in a frown. These feelings couldn’t have been more inconvenient or ill-timed. I desperately needed to get control of my body and thoughts.

 

But then Ben spoke in a low rumble of authority and I knew I had no defense against him in that moment. My only saving grace was that I knew nothing would come of it because Ben was Ben and I was the hot mess that I was. We were friends and we were becoming good friends, but that was all that there was between us.

 

“Liz, I admire how much you think of your sister. I think she’s great too. But you have to understand that we had a great time, there just wasn’t that spark between us. We make great friends though. And we plan on staying friends. She’s even going to help me pick out some furniture this weekend. I didn’t break her heart or treat her badly. And I swear to you, she is not sitting around waiting for my phone call to ask her out. Please believe me.”

 

I swallowed beyond the lump in my throat. “Okay,” I whispered.

 

His hand that gently held my chin dropped to my other shoulder. He stood up to his full height but took a step toward me.

 

He stared down at me with those deep, dark eyes and for a moment I got lost there. I fell into him in a way that scared me. He held my gaze and dipped his head. For a crazy second I thought he wanted to kiss me.

 

After long seconds, he finally spoke, breaking the spell that had settled over the two of us. “You’re a very aggravating woman.” The doorbell rang just as I opened my mouth to defend myself. “I’ll get it,” he said instead. “They’ll need my signature for the pizza.”

 

He took his hands off me and left the kitchen. I collapsed against the refrigerator with weak knees. Who was this guy?

 

I looked over at my kids, but they were blissfully unaware. They’d settled into their drawing projects, not paying attention to me at all.

 

“Go wash up,” I told them. They finally looked up at me. “Ben ordered some pizzas, go wash up and we’ll eat dinner.”

 

“Who’s Ben?” Abby asked.

 

“The pool guy,” I told her.

 

The kids watched in wide-eyed fascination as Ben reappeared with four large pizzas and two boxes of breadsticks.

 

He set the food on the counter and smiled sheepishly at me, “I didn’t know how much would be enough.”

 

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