Chapter Forty-two
Severine leaned her body against the pole light, and watched Thayer’s tall frame exit the Arena. Dressed in a pair of black track pants and a sweatshirt, he should’ve looked sloppy. All Severine could picture was him on the court. Grabbing a gray snowcap from the pocket of his hoodie, he put it on and quickly jogged toward her with a wide grin on his face.
People walked around them and to the warmth of their cars. That was where Severine should be, but instead she was looking up at a guy that had earlier made a declaration to her that he couldn’t take back. Branding in the bedroom —completely alone—was for their pleasure. They’d know the marks on each other and how they got there. But something so simple as a point...it was more than that. Thayer had just told everyone she belonged to him.
The air was covered in white flakes. They fell around them, and a few clung to their faces. Severine felt one fall on her eyelashes. She still stared up at Thayer.
“That was a good game.”
Thayer dug his hands into pockets of his track pants as he lifted a single brow and spoke. “You told me you weren’t going to come.”
Severine also never thought she’d be craving Thayer in her bed, but things happen that you don’t expect. Keeping her hands busy, Severine slid closer and placed them in a single pocket of his hoodie. “I wanted to see you play.”
He enveloped her space and pressed closer. “I saw you after half-time. You were talking to Lily.”
“So your first idea was to point at me?” Severine asked.
“You didn’t like my acknowledgement?” Thayer asked innocently. Severine knew better. It was all planned out.
“I didn’t say I didn’t like it...” Severine said slowly. “But now everyone will be wondering what’s between us.”
He lifted a hand to grasp her cheek. “Maybe that’s the exact reason I did it.”
“I still want everything kept private...I want you to myself.”
Thayer’s jaw clenched, and he looked up at the sky. “And you think if people know it will ruin this?”
Severine’s extracted her hands from his pocket and lay her head on his shoulder. “Exactly!”
Like everything else in her life, Severine was afraid she’d take all this in too quickly. Thayer tended to surfeit through her. She’d probably never be satisfied with anything in her life. But with him, she was willing to toss out all her theories for the future. “I’m trying my best, Thayer.”
He slowly nodded and walked her to his truck, with his arm tightly wrapped around her. They walked in silence, both lost in their own thoughts. Severine finally broke the quiet. “What do you want to do tonight?”
For a second, he played with his keys before he looked at her. “I wanna take you somewhere.”
Severine narrowed her eyes as he opened her door. “Where?”
“It’s nowhere you’d think.”
Severine buckled herself in and looked over at Thayer’s profile. There was just enough light pooling in from the pole light outside for her to see the mischievous smile on his face. “You’re freaking me out.”
“Are you doubting me?” Thayer asked as he pulled out of the parking lot.
Severine shook her head instantly. “No.”
“Good. Trust me.”
I trust you with everything.
* * * * *
Severine stared at the scene in front of her skeptically. “Why are we at a park?”
Thayer wiggled his eyebrows and grabbed his gym bag for a pair of gloves. “We’re gonna play a game.”
“You are?”
“We both are,” Thayer corrected.
“I’m in boots with heels, and it’s freezing. I don’t feel like getting hypothermia.”
“You have gloves, and you have a hood on your coat,” Thayer pointed out. “When you start shooting the basketball, you won’t care.”
Severine reluctantly placed her purse on the dashboard. Her eyes were still cautious as she watched Thayer put a pair of gloves on. “I wanna know why we’re here in the first place. You just played a game. Shouldn’t you be tired?”
“Nope.” Thayer grinned happily. Across from her was a man that dominated on the basketball court. But right now, he looked innocent and carefree. “Let’s go.”
Their doors slammed closed at the same time. Thayer waited for her at the hood of his truck. Tucked tight to his hip was a basketball. His right hand was held out for her to take.
As they walked, Severine peered closer at the small basketball court placed in the middle of the park. Only two lamplights were placed around it, giving enough illumination for the hoops to be seen. A thin layer of snow hid the concrete and painted lines on the ground.
“I’m gonna bust my ass,” Severine muttered as they trekked toward the small court. “I can feel it. My ass is already tingling from the contact.”
“I’m not making you do full layups,” Thayer teased.
“I kind of want to do what you did tonight.”
Thayer threw back his head and laughed. “A slam dunk?”
“Yeah. I have the potential.” Severine said seriously. She only lasted for a few seconds before a smile crept its way onto her face.
He looked down at her and grinned. “You think so?”
“I know it.” Severine couldn’t keep her face solemn any longer. She grinned widely as Thayer looked at her skeptically. “You wanna know a super nerd moment for me?”
“Tell me.”
“When I was really little, my babysitter let watch Space Jam. Remember that movie?”
Thayer nodded and laughed loudly. “Hell, yeah. I think I forced Mathias to watch that with me every day for a month. He still cringes anytime I mention Michael Jordan.”
“Well, I loved it. That was when I used to think everything was possible.
The two of them walked onto the snow-covered court. Thayer dusted the snow away with his shoe, making the free throw line apparent.
He turned to the hoop and shot the ball. It connected with the hoop and slammed down to the ground. Thayer ran after it and beckoned Severine to come closer.
“I’m not moving,” Severine warned. “I’ll just shoot from the free throw line.”
Thayer smiled and passed the ball to her. “I’m surprised you know what that is.”
Severine rolled her eyes. “I was actually good at basketball.”
“How good?”
“Good enough to kick your ass,” Severine teased. He gave her a funny expression. “I enjoyed it a lot.” She twirled the basketball with her fingers and after years, she did her best to keep the form correct. It hit the rim and veered to the right.
“Not bad, Blake.”
Severine laughed and ran after the ball. “Not bad? Kids on youth leagues can shoot better than me.”
“You haven’t played in years.” Thayer pointed out. He was just being generous. They both knew she sucked.
Severine tsked at Thayer and tossed him the ball. “It’s so easy to give advice when you’re on top.”
With one hand, he aimed at the hoop. It was a swish. Back and forth they went. Severine mostly watched from the side.
“You wanna call it quits?”
“Nah.” Severine looked down at her boots that were undoubtedly ruined from the snow. She was having too much fun to leave. “My feet are past the frozen stage.”
Thayer laughed and shot the ball and then retrieved it. The process continued for a few more minutes. Severine finally interrupted the quaint silence between them. “So why did you bring me here tonight?”
He lifted his shoulders and shot the ball. “I wanted you to see a part of my life.”
“Didn’t I see that tonight at the game?”
The ball landed on the concrete waiting to be picked up. Thayer stayed put and stared at her. “That’s just a game. Privately, when no one is around, it’s a chance for me to focus and clear my head.”
“It’s therapeutic.” Severine said quietly as she looked at him.
Thayer picked the ball back up and shot underneath the basket. “Exactly.”
Severine walked up the to the free throw line. Thayer joined her and stared at the basket. “When I was I kid, all I had was a basket attached to a barn.”
Severine peeked a look at him and let him speak.
“It was the crappiest thing. The barn was close to falling apart. It had a caved-in roof, the red paint of the building was past chipped and faded. At one side of the barn was the basketball hoop. It was like the barn and barely hanging on. My grandpa and dad took it down, and we painted it white again. In green paint we had my last name, my jersey number fifty-five, and NBA in bold letters. After that, I didn’t care what held up the hoop. It was holding my dreams.”
“You used it a lot?”
Thayer nodded. “All the time. Winter was my favorite time to play. I’d get off the school bus and go straight to the place that I considered, ‘my area,’ and play until my bones felt frozen. The sun would set early and I’d watch it go down and keep shooting until the lamp light came on. I didn’t really need the light. I knew my shot by heart.”
“Weren’t you ever told to go inside?”
A small smile came onto Thayer’s lips. “All the time. I’m crazy, though, I loved the winter air. My lungs felt clean afterwards. Everything felt refreshed.”
“Did it always stay that way for you?”
Finally Thayer turned to her. A part of his soul was being shared. His gray eyes were raw and fresh with the truth. “Not always. Life got a little better, and a little worse. I don’t think I can ever close this door of my life. It will always be an outlet for me.”
“Do you want to go pro?”
Thayer shook his head. “No. To get to that point it’d be less of an outlet and more about the game. If I miss a shot here, it doesn’t matter. If I make one, well that just surges me further.” He turned to her and held the ball out. “You shoot.”
Severine clapped her hands together, and Thayer tossed it her way. The first shot of Severine’s bounced off the rim. Thayer tossed the ball back to her. She tried again and missed. Her body was less chilled and her breath hefted out lightly. Severine kept catching the ball from Thayer. Sometimes she’d make a shot, but most times she didn’t. But when she did, Thayer was right, it encouraged her to keep going. Severine’s cheeks were frozen, her hood had fallen off minutes ago, but she was having genuine fun.
“Your turn.”
“You weren’t bad,” Thayer conceded.
Severine flipped her hood back up and finally asked a question she knew he might not answer. “When you started playing basketball...why was it a hard time for you?”
The flicker of light in his eyes went away. “My parents were getting divorced and were each trying to get full custody of us. My mom won after a nasty battle. I lived with her for a year until my grandpa won full custody of Mathias and me. Macsen stayed with my mom.”
She tried to picture both Macsen and Thayer broken apart as children, living in two different households. Sympathy wrapped around her heart. They should’ve been able to know each other. They were brothers. “That’s why you lived in Tennessee as a kid.”
He nodded. “During my seventh grade year, Mathias and I finally got to live with my dad. I’d visit my grandparents in the summer. They were like second parents.”
“I can understand that,” Severine said quietly.
She processed Thayer’s explanation of his family life. It answered so much. Her heart ached for him, though. When her parents split, she was too little to notice the change. How could she miss something that had never been there? But to be tossed around between two parents like a hacky sack would’ve done more damage than Severine could ever imagine.
“Is that another thing we have in common?” Thayer asked.
Severine nodded and walked closer to him. Thayer rolled the ball away and met her halfway. “I think we’re alike in so many ways.”
“I liked you watching me play tonight,” Thayer whispered.
Her throat felt like it closed; she couldn’t get enough air in her body. When he looked at her so sincerely, she forgot everything else. “I liked watching you, too.”
“Not at the game. Here. Right now.” His honesty projected off him and onto Severine.
She wanted a ladder to climb into his soul and fix everything that had ever broken him.
“My ass is numb and I’ve lost all feeling in my feet. But I don’t care.”
“Are you still that cold?” His arms wrapped around her tightly.
“After jumping around and shooting? I’m just chilled now.”
His fingers pressed into her hair and the snow falling down around them melted into her dark strands. Severine kept her body still. Pressed against him, she didn’t feel the algid temperature.
“The winter sun burns the worst. You know that, right?”
Severine said nothing in response. Her chest was being slammed by a freight train. Whatever he said, she knew it was going to crush her. From the truth in his eyes, she knew he wouldn’t be able to take it back.
“No one would really know. Who stays outside long enough to really notice? The air is freezing and harsh. But if you really concentrate, you’ll feel the heat.” Thayer laughed harshly. It pained him to speak. “I think you’re my winter burn.”
The war in her mind came at a standstill. There was no optimism left for her. She wouldn’t walk away from him pain free.