“I mean it,” he says. “I love you.”
I nod my head before realizing that I should probably say something back. I barely get the words out as I say, “I’m so totally in love with you.”
He smiles in a way I’ve never seen. The corners of his eyes crinkle slightly, and his cheeks are so high up on his face it almost looks painful. The nervous energy fades into the background as we move toward the bed, still holding one another, and still smiling. Kissing is great, but this is better. As he lays me on his bed, I try not to think about how he learned his moves. The way he runs his hands up and down my thighs to the light touch over my dark brown curls sends blissful waves through my entire body. His lips press light, purposeful kisses to every peak and valley of my pale flesh, and when he finally crawls up my naked frame, I wrap my hand around his silk-soft member as he shows me how to roll on a condom. Everything about this is as perfect as perfect can be. Bringing him inside of me stings for a moment before it dulls to a raw ache. Still, I won’t let him stop. No pain could make this so uncomfortable that I wouldn’t want this with him.
Through all the new sensations and the buzz of my building orgasm, I make myself a promise that I won’t ever leave him and I won’t ever hurt him.
IT’S NEARLY THREE in the morning when I realize that I really need to get home. Dad won’t stand for my being out all night, especially if he finds where I’ve gone. Not that he would have any doubts. Duke and Nic—but more importantly, Robin—are all asleep, so once we’re dressed, Jeremy leads me out the front door. It feels slightly more respectable than sneaking in his bedroom window.
When I pull up to the house, I breathe a sigh of relief that all the lights are off. Thankfully it seems like Dad and Holly are tucked safely in their bed. I cut the engine and slowly climb out of the car. My thighs are sore and I feel little bit grimy, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. Being with Jeremy like that was better than I even could have imagined.
I want to do it again. Only, I hope it doesn’t hurt so much next time. And maybe next time I’ll actually orgasm and it won’t fade away at the last moment.
The front door unlocks with ease, and I cancel the alarm before it makes a sound. If Dad really wants to keep me in the house all night, he should probably change the code. I’m way too good at this for his own good.
I make it past the kitchen and into the living room, at the foot of the stairs, before it happens. The light switch clicks, and the room is suddenly basked in artificial light from one of the end-table lamps. I’ve been caught sneaking out and sneaking back in before, so that’s not such a big deal. It’s the fact that my hair is a complete disaster, I’m pretty sure I have a few hickeys on my neck, and I smell like Jeremy that worries me.
“You better have a good fucking explanation for this,” Dad says.
I still haven’t turned around to meet his eyes, both out of fear and embarrassment. My heart beats loudly in my chest, and my hands shake at my sides. This is going to be bad.
With a stiff upper lip, I turn around and face my fears. Dad is wearing a pair of his old black sweatpants that Grandma’s asked him to throw away more times than I can count. As always, he hasn’t worn a shirt to bed, and his wavy hair is pointing in a hundred different directions.
“I’m an adult,” I say. Something moves in the corner of the room, and it’s only then that I notice Holly in the chair by the fireplace. She’s wearing one of Dad’s big T-shirts and, from the looks of it, nothing else. Of course it’s okay for him to have sex with his girlfriend, but it’s not okay for me to have sex with my boyfriend. At least we’ve had enough respect for household furnishings not to do it on the fucking kitchen table. He is such a hypocrite.
“You are way too wrapped up in that boy,” he says. He folds his arms over his chest and shakes his head. I can tell that he’s trying his best to hold back his temper, but it looks like it’s barely working. That’s okay because my temper is shot, so this is about to get real good.
“What’s your problem with me and Jeremy? Is it because I want to spend every minute with him? Is it because I don’t want to be away from him? What is it, Dad?”
“Yeah,” he says. His tone is more biting than it was a moment ago, but that’s probably in reaction to mine.
“Then what the hell are you doing with Holly? You’re always together, you hate to be away from her. You live together. If I need to take a step back, so do you.”