She was dangerous for me in every way. I was addicted to her warmth, her kiss, her body.
Not only that, the more time she spent with Ella, the more I was drawn to her. She didn’t treat her like a kid, but a friend, which I respected. She wanted no part of authority and respected those boundaries as well. After her first few days in St. Thomas, Ella made it impossible for Koti to feel left out. She refused to do anything without her. Their fast bond made Ella’s trip much easier to manage. I didn’t constantly have the need to cater to one or the other. If I was honest, it was one of the best times I’d had with Ella. Our first vacation away from Texas just us, father and daughter, a new definition of family.
Except Koti really wasn’t a part of it, so she played friend to both of us. I couldn’t help but get a little sentimental at the sight of Koti when she slid on her mask.
“Now there is a familiar sight.”
She grinned and pushed her chest out. “Except this time, I have miss tits.”
I groaned. “Don’t remind me.”
She bounced from flipper to flipper. “You were all hot and bothered over my mother then, ewww.”
“Hey, she was a retired supermodel and I was fourteen, sue me.”
“Whatever happened to your chipped tooth?”
“The miracle of modern dentistry.”
“You should have kept it, you were a lot cuter with it.”
“Was I?”
“Your freckles are gone too, shame, and a lot of your accent. I would say I improved and you went downhill.” Throwing my head back, I laughed as Ella came barreling through the front door with her flippers attached.
“Let’s go!”
We all made our way down to the beach as Disco avoided the water, barking at the tide. After a day of sun and snorkeling, the girls settled by a fresh fire I constructed, marshmallows roasting.
“This is the life. That’s how you say it right, Koti?”
“Yes. That’s exactly how you say it.”
“I wish I lived here,” Ella piped. “Do you ever get tired of it?”
“Never. And I’ll never leave.”
“Do you ever go back to the States?”
“Technically, St. Thomas is the US.”
“You know what I mean,” Ella snorted.
“I haven’t yet. I’m not a fan of flying, but I will.”
“Will you come see me at my new school?”
I slashed the air with my hand, my eyes all warning and Ella went immediately on the defensive.
“Sorry, Dad, but I like her. She’s my friend too. And you could let her sleep at our house since she let us stay with her all this time.”
A moment of uncomfortable silence passed before I spoke up.
“True. Koti, you’re welcome to come to Texas anytime.”
“Thanks,” she said, with a laugh due to my discomfort. She’d been true to her word and hadn’t made any part of our situation awkward. A part of me hoped our time together meant more to her than a fling because it was becoming the case for me, but I knew I couldn’t have it both ways.
“Or we could come back here, right Daddy? I’m sure Grandma won’t mind.”
“Right.” I stared at the fire as the girls stuffed their mouths with s’mores and compared their chocolate-covered faces. I gazed at my daughter who was the perfect picture of innocence and the woman who sat next to her, who didn’t deserve the shit cards she was dealt but looked just as pure sitting next to her. Inwardly I sighed as I snuffed out the fire and followed them in the house. Our nightly book club had begun, but it seemed I was the only one serious about reading as they giggled back and forth comparing notes about Outlander while snacking on grapes.
“Jamieeeee,” Ella snorted. “He’s so hot.”
“He totally is,” Koti said, with far too much enthusiasm for my taste.
After several minutes of listening to their fawning over a fictional man, I lowered my book and gave them a pointed look. “Would you two shut up.” I picked up my novel in an attempt to resume my reading. A second later, I was smacked in the head with a fistful of grapes. I glared over at the two of them who feigned innocence and hid my grin behind my book.
STEVIE NICKS SANG “EDGE OF Seventeen” as I pulled into the small parking lot singing along at the top of my lungs. Banion greeted me with his usual thousand-watt smile. “Yank, you look fresh.”
“Not from the boat?”
“Nope, you’ve finally got the island glow.”
“Finally, huh?”
“Yep, or something else making you happy. You got a new man?”
“Nope.” And that was the truth of it. “New friend. And I’ve known him since I was a kid.”
“Oh well, he gay?”
I laughed through my reply. “No.”
“Well, then he’s a blind yank. You were bones when ya got here.”
“I know.”
“All fixed up then?”
I nodded, my smile disappearing. “My parents came and went.”
He looked me over, his skin darker from days of endless sun. “Not such a good time?”
“Not at all.”
He shrugged. “Things happen the way they are supposed to happen, nothing you can do.”
“Yeah.”
“Something else bothering ya?”
“Nope.”
“So, this friend is nothing more? I think you pretend. I will wait here with a bottle of your banana rum,” he joked as he handed me three fresh bouquets.
A month had passed since Ella left the island and Ian had managed to get back to the States twice. Each time he went I got a taste of missing him. Wanting to believe it was good exercise for my heart, I spent my days alone venturing out of my house, keeping dinner dates with Jasmine. I’d even graced her infamous wine bar again, got drunk off my ass and ended up dancing until the wee hours of the morning. I may have accidentally slipped up that night and borrowed Jasmine’s phone to FaceTime my soon to be ex non-boyfriend.
He appeared on screen with a scowl. It was, after all, two o’clock in the morning.
“What in the hell are you doing, Koti?”
“Just wanted to check in with you, crocky.”
“It’s late.”
“Or early, don’t be such a pessimist.”
He groaned as I tilted the phone down giving him an ample shot of my cleavage. “Try to use your nice words, I might be in the midst of missing you and you’re going to fuck it all up.”
He grinned then as he sat up in bed. “I might be missing you too. A little. But I have to say there are perks of sleeping in my own bed.”
“Yeah, like what?”
“I don’t get slapped in the head every night.”
“That’s active dreaming, totally unintentional.”
“I don’t have a dog trying to lick my balls in the morning.”
“That’s not her fault, they look a lot more fun than they are.”
He lifted a brow. “I’ll grant you that.”
Ziggy Marley sang “Drive” over the radio as I stood and swayed my hips.
“So, I take it Jasmine finally talked you into another night out.”
“Are you proud of me?”
His smile had me melting on the spot I was swaying in. “Very.”
“Well, I didn’t do it so you would be proud of me. Believe it or not, I love to dance.”
“Then we should dance together.”
Stopping my hips, I stood at a nearby stool at the bar. “You dance?”
“God, you act like I’m the Grinch.”
“If the Whoville hat fits.”
He shook his head, giving me that dead stare I’d grown to love.
“I’ll be back in four days. I’m trying to tie some things up here.”
It wasn’t my place to ask what things, so I didn’t. “K. See you then. Night.”
There was a pause on his end as his eyes swept my face, the silence conveying more than we were allowed. “Night, beauty.”
Ian’s bag was left abandoned on the porch as he pressed me against my back door taking turns between nipping and biting at my neck.
“This dress, damn,” he said as I smiled against his kiss.
“You like it?”
“I hope you aren’t wearing this out.”
My deep red backless sundress dipped so low you could see the divot at the top of my ass. My tits were bared on either side by a thin strip of material. Tilting my head back, I gasped as he discovered I wasn’t wearing a thing underneath.
“You better not be wearing this out of the house.”