“Oh, hello Lauren my daughter, is this a new number? It didn’t come up as you on my phone”
“Yes it is a new number, delete the old one and swap it with this, how are you?”
“Yeah, we are all good here; Jason rang me a couple of weeks ago, asking if I had seen you, what was that all about, what’s going on?”
“Jason rang looking for me, why didn’t you call and tell me?”
“Well I was going to but we had to pick Emma’s kids up from school and it went right out of my head and he didn’t call back so I assumed he had found you and you had gotten over your little sulk”
Emma’s kids. Of course, her new husband’s grandchildren would obviously be top of her priority, much more important than her own, possibly missing youngest child.
“Wow, thanks for being so concerned with my welfare mother, good job I was only running from a case of domestic violence and that it wasn’t anything too serious ehh”
“What, what are you talking about, what domestic violence, what’s going on?”
“I have left Jason mum; he has violently abused me our entire marriage but it’s gotten progressively worse over the past couple of years and I ended up at the hospital a few weeks back with bruised ribs, a fractured cheek, and a dislocated shoulder. On top of that, he has also been shagging around. I don’t know how many other women there have been or for how long it’s been going on but I know for sure that there has been at least one and I’m done with it mum, I’ve left him and not only have I left him but I’ve met somebody else and moved in with him” I pause for a second “and he’s ten years younger than me, his name is Gabriel, and I’m so in love I could burst”
“Gabriel, what sort of name is that for a bloke?”
“What, that’s all you have to say?”
“Well look Lauren, I’m sorry about you and Jason, but I did always think he was a bit of a bully and if he’s been knocking you about, well then you’ve probably done the right thing leaving him. Really, if it’s been going on a long time, perhaps you should have left him years ago”
Unbelievable, there’s me expecting snide remarks and she’s fully supportive and telling me I should have acted sooner, unbelievable.
“So, what’s this Gabriel like? A bit manlier than his name I hope, it’s a bit of a poofs name ain’t it? Can’t see you being with some poofta type after being with a man’s man like Jason all these years, ten years younger eh? Well done you” She says on a laugh.
Unbelievable! This reaction is so not what I was expecting, every time she opens her mouth she surprises me.
“Mum, Gabe is far from a poof, he is very much all man”
“Good, glad to hear it. How have the boys taken the news, have you told your brothers and Vickie?”
“Sonny’s okay with it, Ryder is refusing to take my calls and I haven’t spoken to any of the rest of the family, but I will”
We continue our conversation with small talk and we end it with her telling me if I ever need to get away, I should come and stay with her, she would love to see me. That’s the kindest thing my mum has said to me in years and I get to wondering, is it just pity that made her be nice to me for a change? Very probably.
I scroll through the messages on my phone, and then listen to my voice mails, they’re all from Jay, the first being sent on Monday and only confirms that Julie's husband, John, must have gone straight into work and repeated what his wife had seen, or a version of it at least.
Well you didn't waste any time did you, you fucking whore, or was this already going on? I should of broke your neck, you fucking slut, showing off your new boyfriend at the supermarket and fucking him in the middle of the shopping center in front of everyone, just wait till I get my fucking hands on you, and whoever the cunt is, wait till I find out where he lives'
His voice sounds venomous and it actually gives me goose bumps listening to him. The next voicemail was left at three in the morning on Wednesday.
‘Lauren, we need to talk, we need to sort this out, it’s just silly now, and you need to come home. Let’s just forget all that’s happened and make a fresh start’
Well that’s a complete change of tone, it actually makes my pulse quicken, I don’t want to but I feel a little bit sorry for him, he is obviously realising that I am not coming back. I feel sad and guilty, shit, I don’t want to feel anything when I hear him but how can I not, there are a quarter of a century of emotions tied up in that voice, most of them fantastic and joyous, I can’t switch all of that off in just a few short weeks, I don’t want to hurt him with what I have with Gabe but for me, there is no going back, I have seen the light and no matter how this new relationship unfolds, I will not go back to being the person I was just a month ago, I won’t go back into the dark.